Don Tiny wrote:
The problem with breaking-up with a Japanese girl is you have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message.
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| To bring some levity back to the board, https://mail.chicagofanatics.com/viewtopic.php?f=100&t=100625 |
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| Author: | chaspoppcap [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:13 am ] |
| Post subject: | To bring some levity back to the board, |
this is one of my 8 year old nephews jokes. Why does Cinderella not play Basketball??? She is afraid of balls |
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| Author: | rogers park bryan [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:14 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
So your 8 year old nephew is Bernstein's cousin the Doctor? |
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| Author: | FavreFan [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:17 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
That's a hell of a joke Chas. I think the board can begin healing now. |
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| Author: | chaspoppcap [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:24 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
another one What do you call a cow having seizures? Beef Jerky |
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| Author: | Don Tiny [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:26 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is. |
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| Author: | good dolphin [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:27 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
what do you call a masturbating cow? Beef Strokenoff |
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| Author: | Don Tiny [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:28 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
good dolphin wrote: what do you call a masturbating cow? Beef Strokenoff Didn't The Unknown Comic get in trouble for telling that one on The Gong Show? |
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| Author: | Don Tiny [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:29 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
I heard they moved the Jerry Sandusky statue to the library ... they figured it would encourage more people that see him to stay quiet. |
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| Author: | leashyourkids [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:30 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
This will be a happy-go-lucky thread until someone steps over the line with a joke. Don't be that guy, chas. |
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| Author: | Don Tiny [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:31 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
The problem with breaking-up with a Japanese girl is you have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message. |
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| Author: | FavreFan [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:32 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
leashyourkids wrote: This will be a happy-go-lucky thread until someone steps over the line with a joke. Don't be that guy, chas. Like any good comic, Chas knows his job is to find where that line is drawn and then cross it deliberately. |
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| Author: | Chus [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:32 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
Don Tiny wrote: The problem with breaking-up with a Japanese girl is you have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message. Too soon. |
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| Author: | chaspoppcap [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:37 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
what do you call a cow with no leggs?? Ground beef |
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| Author: | Don Tiny [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:39 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves? Christopher Walken |
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| Author: | chaspoppcap [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:40 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
leashyourkids wrote: This will be a happy-go-lucky thread until someone steps over the line with a joke. Don't be that guy, chas. Give me the talk,have you seen what Don Tiny been posting? |
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| Author: | Sir Loin Of Beef [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:44 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
Don Tiny wrote: The problem with breaking-up with a Japanese girl is you have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message.
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| Author: | Hockey Gay [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:47 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
You guys hear about the guy in Wisconsin who died while drinking milk? The cow fell on him. |
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| Author: | chaspoppcap [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:47 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
How can you tell the bride at a Packers wedding?? New overalls |
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| Author: | Unfunny Mult [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:49 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn’t find any. |
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| Author: | Chus [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:50 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
chaspoppcap wrote: How can you tell the bride at a Packers wedding?? New overalls
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| Author: | chaspoppcap [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:50 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
I bought a package of batteries but they weren't included |
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| Author: | Hockey Gay [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:51 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
chaspoppcap wrote: How can you tell the bride at a Packers wedding?? New overalls BEARS!!!! |
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| Author: | leashyourkids [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:54 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
chaspoppcap wrote: leashyourkids wrote: This will be a happy-go-lucky thread until someone steps over the line with a joke. Don't be that guy, chas. Give me the talk,have you seen what Don Tiny been posting? Point taken, but Don would have been 2nd on the list. |
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| Author: | Don Tiny [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:55 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
leashyourkids wrote: chaspoppcap wrote: leashyourkids wrote: This will be a happy-go-lucky thread until someone steps over the line with a joke. Don't be that guy, chas. Give me the talk,have you seen what Don Tiny been posting? Point taken, but Don would have been 2nd on the list. I'm a lovable scamp. |
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| Author: | chaspoppcap [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 11:59 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
U.S. Marine bumper stickers U.S. Marines -- Travel Agents To Allah" "The Marine Corps -- When It Absolutely, Positively Has To Be Destroyed Overnight" "Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Anyone Who Threatens It" "Except For Ending Slavery, Fascism, Nazism, and Communism, WAR has Never Solved Anything.* |
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| Author: | chaspoppcap [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 12:01 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
Military Rules By Service Marine Corps Rules: 1. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one. 2. Decide to be aggressive enough, quickly enough. 3. Have a plan. 4. Have a back-up plan, because the first one probably won't work. 5. Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet even your friends… 6. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun whose caliber does not start with a "4." 7. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive. 8. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend. (Lateral & diagonal preferred.) 9. Use cover or concealment as much as possible. 10. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours. 11. Always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose. 12. In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived. 13. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating your intention to shoot. Navy SEAL's Rules: 1. Look very cool in sunglasses. 2. Kill every living thing within view. 3. Adjust speedo. 4. Check hair in mirror. US Army Rangers Rules: 1. Walk in 50 miles wearing 75 pound rucksack while starving. 2. Locate individuals requiring killing. 3. Request permission via radio from "Higher" to perform killing. 4. Curse bitterly when mission is aborted. 5. Walk out 50 miles wearing a 75 pound rucksack while starving. US Army Rules: 1. Curse bitterly when receiving operational order. 2. Make sure there is extra ammo and extra coffee. 3. Curse bitterly. 4. Curse bitterly. 5. Do not listen to 2nd LT's; it can get you killed. 6. Curse bitterly. US Air Force Rules: 1. Have a cocktail. 2. Adjust temperature on air-conditioner. 3. See what's on HBO. 4. Ask "what is a gunfight?" 5. Request more funding from Congress with a "killer" Power Point presentation. 6. Wine & dine 'key' Congressmen, invite DOD & defense industry executives. 7. Receive funding, set up new command and assemble assets. 8. Declare the assets "strategic" and never deploy them operationally. 9. Hurry to make 13:45 tee-time. 10. Make sure the base is as far as possible from the conflict but close enough to have tax exemption. US Navy Rules: 1. Go to Sea. 2. Drink Coffee. 3. Deploy Marines |
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| Author: | Hockey Gay [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 12:03 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
Well this thread is ruined now. It had a good run. |
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| Author: | chaspoppcap [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 12:05 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
Ill jump back to kids stuff How Can you tell the groom at a Packers Wedding? New Rodgers Shirt |
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| Author: | chaspoppcap [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 12:06 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
Why do Flies have wings??? To beat Sox fans to the garbage cans |
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| Author: | pittmike [ Wed Jun 01, 2016 12:06 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: To bring some levity back to the board, |
Don Tiny wrote: The problem with breaking-up with a Japanese girl is you have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message.
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