I know it's rather mean to laugh at this sort of thing because some of the people are obviously pouring their heart out...but i mean, you chose craigslist to say this? you may as well spraypaint a bridge or something. then some of these are just really fucking funny.

I find it most fun to read these aloud in other voices like...kermit the frog, or robert de niro, or my favorite...mike murphy. try it, it's really great.

here are some samples:

"Hurt m4w"

Before I left Aurora, for Basic Training, we were a real good couple. i loved you so much, everything was going right. i wrote you every week, and i would say "i love you and only you". One day i had 10 minutes to call you, i tried your cell, your moms cell, and your brothers cell, all were out of service. i cried like a girl that day, all i wanted was to hear your voice. the last letter you wrote me, you didn't say that you loved me like you did in all the other letters. On the day I Graduated from the Army basic training i finally got a hold of you. and the first thing you say is "we shouldn't be together". And i asked you what went wrong and you didn't tell me.

that was the worst feeling...not knowing.

then i got 2 weeks off for christmas, and i came home. i called you up and asked if i can come and see you. but i guess you were too busy for me. then i found out you were with someone else while i was in Training.

Alexis, i love you. but that was so wrong. i treated you so good. I don't deserve this.

its been over 2 months since we have talked. i have had several dreams about you. I'm over the break up, but I'm not over what you did. I think about us everyday, and that sucks SOOO MUCH, like i cannot even explain. I don't think i can truly forgive you for that. but I don't know if you care.

PS. when i get my house to myself, I'm gonna want our dog.

oohhhhaww...tough break! bitch, give him the dog back at least!

"That damn acura - w4w"

I miss you!!! I am sorry i disappoint you. I cant wait to see you so i can kick your ass in basketball.

You are my soulmate, lover, definately my better half. I only wish i could make you as happy as u make me..why do u think i gave u that handcuff??

oohh, snap! yeah right, we all know this is KI and OKC. w4w my ass.

"Please respond if you see this. -m4w 34"

Hi, if you see this please respond, i would like to talk with you and want to ask you somethig, i live acrross street and you drive black saturn, you live on 2nd floor, we see each other on window.....u are so nice woman....let me know please.........on oak park s.

"And you're just what she's looking for...stranger leering out his window...

"I am so Done with you - m4w"

You bitch. You have done nothing but toy with my emotions from day 1. It is painfully obvious now that you were simply playing with me for your own sick amusement. How was I so blind? I don't know who I hate more for this. You for what you did or myself for allowing it to go on for so long. You are heartless & have no soul. I hope you get everything you have coming to you & you burn in hell. Karma is a bitch, just like you. It was catch up to you one day. Have a nice fucking life.



ohhhohohohoo...OUCH!! FAjent really giving it to bigfan.

"I truly do miss you - m4w

You opened it. Good luck. Tonight at midnight your true love will realize they miss you. Something good will happen to you between 1:00 pm and 4:40 pm tomorrow, it could be anywhere. Tonight at midnight they will remember how much they loved you. You will get a shock of a lifetime tomorrow, a good one. If you break the chain you will be cursed with relationship problems for the next two years. Karma. If there is someone you loved, or still do, and can't get them out of your mind, re-post this in another city within the next 5 minutes. Its amazing how it works.If you truly miss someone, a past love, and can't seem to get them off your mind....then re-post this titled as " I Truly Do Miss You" Whoever you are missing will surprise you. Don't break this, for tonight at midnight, your true love will realize they love you and something great will happen to you tomorrow. Karma. You will get the shock of your life tomorrow

I can't wait to see what eaglo jeff retorts!

"Just now followed you down Ohio - m4m"

Was walking down from Chilis, you crossed the street to my side, followed you down to Marshalls and I turned, but we met up again at Michigan and Ohio and crossed the street together, followed you until i went into my hotel, you were amazingly hot!! Nice butt by the way, if you see this, I would love to get together sometime, I had on black jacket and black hat, hit me back.


didn't know shakes was in ohio right now. but he probably used grindr right afterwards...

"You are a hot piece of ass of a man! w4m - 22"

Saw you today outside of the L building, around 9 40 am. You were wearing a black jacket and jeans. You hair was all did, you were smoking and drinking coffee..
I dont think you saw me, because of the tinted windows, i was just nerding out with my books.
Was a pleasure to stare at you while you were ranting away with some dudes..



the only "woman" i can believe wrote this would be ugie...and he already knows stink's number. i think...

what ya reading that shit for? i look on craiglist for cars nothing else is worth a damn

_________________

Why did you even stumble upon this and your answer better somehow involve glorious mead?

_________________
That's my purse! I don't know you!

everybody knows the personals section of craigslist is a goldmine of hilarity.

and it's jameson actually tonight.

I'm waiting for the day that I recognize something in a picture on there.

" i tried your cell, your moms cell, and your brothers cell, all were out of service"

Family plan unpaid?

_________________
"That's what the internet is for. Slandering others anonymously." Banky
“Been that way since one monkey looked at the sun and told the other monkey ‘He said for you to give me your fuckin’ share.’”

_________________

What does m4m and w4m mean?

_________________

man for man, woman for man.

_________________

Oak Park Green Line Stop - m4w 27 - (Oak Park)

You know how when you're riding on the CTA you take a seat next to someone when it's crowded and after the car clears out a bit then you move to a seat where you have more space to yourself? Well I THINK that's what you did today on the Green Line (near "Harlem" end) and when you moved you moved to right behind me. I was sort of sitting sideways while resting my arm on the seat backs. Anyway, when I saw you I thought to myself, "I have GOT to talk to this woman," but I couldn't think of something not-creepy to say to you before you got off the train (Oak Park stop, I think). So shoot me an email describing yourself if you're interested in it!

oh come on spmack...you can do better than that!

I can't recall a time I've ever seen a black chick get off at the Oak Park stop....

_________________

_________________

this is some good stuff..i been reading craigslist now missed connections and i was wrong..that is some funny shit man

_________________

re:Suddenly -m4w

ok, not sure who and why,

but you need to let go, the best way, do something about it.

Either ask why, demand them to explain, or find some closure.

Sometimes the best way, is use Facebook or Twitter, Write your side of the dear John letter on Facebook, describe the best, the worst and moments you dont understand.

Its a good way to release, and just maybe, they will see that, and relize that there was more there then they thought...most of the time, Relationships end due to lack of commuincations.

oh NOOOO!!!

Her Hair was Harlow GOLD!!! -m4w (King Arthur)

Your Hair was Harlow Gold your SHA a "Sweet Suprise"! I cruised by while you were waiting for your treasure to come down that slide!!! That was May!!! You called for me in July and I came to you when you were at your worst and I didn't want to leave YOUR SIDE!!! I want to be your bf this May and Your husband NEXT!!!


what the...fshit?

Just wondering? - m4w (Trailers)

Do you think we could ever find peace if we were back together? I don't seem to have it with or without you. If I truly believed that we could do it, I would never leave. I would stand by your side through anything. All I ever asked for was peace! I know you struggle and I've never helped with that, in fact I contributed to it! I miss a lot of us and I can't see any other future except the one we've talked about for years. We were so f*#?ing close to it!


guarantee this guy can't do 30 pushups.

would wager she is fat white and ugly

_________________

haven't been to miscon in a while...here are some fresh ones:

Xport - w4m (Downers)

I just can't get you out of my thoughts!! I'm in love with a stranger! I loved the color of your shirt today! I just wish you would talk to me and kiss me instead of just staring at me. Btw, you are an amazing basketball player!! I will be missing your face till I go back to the gym on Monday!


Charter Fitness Hunk Ugh! - w4m - 36 (West Chicago, Il)

I see you look at me and I feel you, My Heart Pounds with desire wishing you would just take me... Wishing you would shock me by just giving me your number...I just want to sit in the car with you, I just want to look at you closer... I want to feel the intensity ... I want you to take me.... Tell me when you go to the gym.... and what hours.. describe your self and let me know if its you that looks at me....


Charter Fitness Sluts FTW!!!


Remember no secrets? My secret is snow bunny misses you - w4m - 22 (calumet city)

I'm not from Cal City.
I'm exactly 61 miles away.
(1 hour, 9 minutes by car)
we went to high school together.
did the football thing.
I remember wearing your number
for the last game.
I remember texting all the time,
getting to know each other.
I remember you kissing me in your bedroom.
I remember your girlfriend making you
not talk to me after graduation, because she was
insecure.

I remember you crying into my shoulder
around midnight...on one super dark night.
because that nasty she troll dumped you.
I wanted to kill her, just for making you cry.

I remember making out in the hookah bars
because we were both single. but not ready
for anything else.
I remember getting that motel room on that rainy
weekday.. skipping school.
I remember you telling me about her for the first
time, it hurt me so badly, but all I could
do is make a joke about how it's about time you
tried a white girl lol.

I remember finding out on MySpace. ( which I still have a problem with)
that she was going to have your baby girl.
damn near broke my heart.

I remember spending alot of nights walking around
your neighborhood, having the cops ask for our ids. lol
talking about everything.
you were always so easy to talk to.
she didn't like Me though. so you never told
her I was there.
until that one night we went to burger king,
and you were on the phone with her, telling
her your at home, in time for you to take
off your seatbelt and set off the alarm lol
I was laughing so hard.
then it started to get cold. baby girl was coming
soon. you got a job. my boyfriend was an ass.
December 2010. your beautiful daughter arrived.
I got the picture while I was at work.
I was so happy for you I cried.
our friend and I came to see you early January.
the last time. your woman hated me.
my guy hated you. I broke up with him
in November 2011. and contacted a mutual
friend who said you didn't wanna talk to me
anymore. I still blame baby mama.

I miss you.. a lot.
no secrets.


tl;dr

missed exit! "house of trucks"driver - w4m - 37 (i55 north)


House of Trucks with no trailer, this afternoon around 1:00.
You yelled for me to pull over and I whought you were exiting too. By the time I realized you weren't, it was too late.
Hoping there's a chance in hell you will see this, maybe looking for me?

So I know it's you, tell me what made you tell me to pull over.


Wheaton handshake - m4m - 51 (Downtown)

Saw you as you came into the building and got on the elevator and again when I was leaving. Shook your hand but you were occupied already and couldn't talk. Would enjoy coffee/lunch or more with you. Let me know what color shirt you were wearing and what facility we were in. Seemed like a strong connection! Liked what I saw.


NO COMMENT!!!

*** Locker Room- - m4m - 51 (Napervile)

Saw you flashing your junk my way today at EHC RT 53.... I have no experience but and very curious.. I have seen you before...by the way nice body you have. Maybe we can hook up sometime and see what happens. Tell me if I was I had briefs or boxers and what color ? rookie here hope to see you again...


TCF BANK - m4w (Glengale Heights)


You were at the counter, dandillion tatoo i think on your left shoulder like blowin in wind. You had on summer flower jumper with belt and sandles.

You were very cute

having troubles??

Lets meet for drinks and maybe like to help you


Your husband walked up behind you when you were staring in my eyes... - m4w - 46 (Chicago-West Burbs/Hinsdale)


So...I was at the rehearsal dinner and yes, I am sure I am at least 10 yrs older than you which is certainly no problem with me. Your husband was in the wedding party and is an awesome guy except one thing, he is obviously too busy handling his career/buddies/guy time to pay the kind of attention you deserve.
He was once again not paying attention to you...you were having a few drinks when you got up enough nerve to walk up to me, run your hand through my salt and pepper hair and tell me that you just loved my hair and my deep blue eyes. I told you that you have the kind of lips a guy dreamed of because I have always been of the mindset that kissing is a lost art. You told me...if only you knew how much I want you to grab my lip with your mouth and slowly kiss me, that is when your hubby walked up and said, hey...all the guys are running down the street to another bar, do you want to go...you shook your head yes, I bailed for fear I would do much more than I probably should with you. Looking back, damn!!! I should have come along. If only you knew how much I wanted to...so much I want to kiss those beautiful lips!!! (I know...you are married)


the internet brings out the best in people at all times.

I've been looking for this thread. The best ones are the burritos.

_________________

_________________

I know I'd go right to Craigslist on this one -

To the Perv on the CTA Redline - m4m (CTA Redline)
To the guy who got on the CTA Redline (southbound) from Belmont at around 8:30 this morning, f*** you. I don't know what made you think that you could lay your hands on me, but it was not welcomed. You made me feel violated and vulnerable, considering that you sat in the aisle seat next to me, which blocked me from my only way out.

I did not want to make a scene because, considering that you were bold enough to grab for my crotch (regardless of how many times I pushed your hand away), I was afraid of you responding with violence. Perhaps that's what you were betting on: either I would accept your advances or that I would be too afraid to make a scene.

Just know that I am currently filing a report against you to CPD and giving them the photo I quickly took of you right after I pushed my way out.

_________________
You know me like that.

_________________

There's an uncomfortable number of dudes looking for other dudes they were checking out in the locker room.

_________________
You know me like that.

What? You don't like the competition?

I put my m4m ads of dudes I was checking out in the locker room in the newspaper classifieds like normal, God-fearing people.

_________________
You know me like that.

i could see this same post being in the miserable facebook people thread.