you know, i've been doing a lot of soul searching lately and i've come to a decision on an issue of major importance in my day-to-day life: whenever b&b ends and it's time for terry's two favorite words in show business, LAWANCE HOMES, i have been conditioned to expect nothing but the highest quality early-evening sportstalk radio in town. and i get that... but lately, something hasn't been right.

it used to be that each show kicked off with a rousing rendition of LMFAO's "shooting star" which opens with a vocodered "L-M-F-A-O" and then a sample of some woman saying "shake that" and then the instrumental version ensued. if you missed the opening, fret not, every half/hour started off with the song. it was more than a stupid bumper to set up the show... it was a theme song. it was a lifestyle. it was a declaration of party time on the sports talk radio circuit (stay tuned for the subliminal song of the day and later on the people's hour.... seriously WHO ELSE GIVES US AN HOUR OF THEIR SHOW?! )

the formal lyrics start off like "we like to party rock / we came to lose control / came to get the party people dancing" and if that isn't the epitome of a laurence holmes show, i don't know what is. since we'll never get back the "who's taking a hit off of michael phelps' bong?" segment, this was as closed to unrequited party in convenient sports talk radio show format as we're ever going to get.

laurence is a mystery to me... on one hand he embraces all of the things that all of the classic-rock-perpetual-repeating people on this board make fun of him for... the comic books, the tough guy status, the crusade against "grown ass men" wearing sports jerseys (unless it's on "all bets are off" aka "chicago tribune live" -- then it serves a higher purpose) and say what you will of the man voted chicago's least favorite sports talk radio host on this very board, he embraces what makes him sir laurence of larry holmes.

on the other hand, he seems to cave in to some of the pressure doled out by denizen of this board... he changed his themesong to some classic rock song that i know nothing about... he mentions the board and the haters... and he sometimes tries to get outside of himself and become our facebook friends.

i say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. since the soothsayer macradamus has predicted that jason goff won't be one of our favorite hosts until the year 2021, it's obvious that laurence is here for awhile. now that we're approaching a season where he's going to be on 4 hours a night more often than not, why not show the haters that their venom can never defeat your spiderman by bringing back shake that?

i once postulated that schoolkids should be taught the ways of redman's seminal song, i'll bee dat, a song which celebrates the fact that there will be haters who will say this and that but you know what? fuck you, I'LL BEE DAT. rather than make this 500% tl;dr by quoting the lyrics of the whole song, i'll drop the hook and a little bit of the beginning of the second verse... and while i do that, i'll secretly be dancing to LMFAO... not in physical form, for that would be embarrassing, but IN MY HEART AND SOUL, WHERE IT MATTERS.

[Chorus]
My middle name must be Fuck You
Cause every time I walk by
niggaz be like, "F-U-UCCCK YOUUUUU!"
I'll be dat, I'll be dat, I'll be dat, I'll be dat
My first name must be He Ain't Shit
Cause every time I'm in a car
bitches be like, "He ain't shit!"
I'll be dat, I'll be dat, I'll be dat, I'll be dat

Yo nigga, yo yo nigga
I heard the party goin on in there - YEAH
Well let me shake my stankin ass in there - YEAH!
Soon as I walk in, dogs are barkin (ARF ARF ARF)
Haters play the back, I stay in front like handicapped parkin

so for the love of god, larry, do us all a favor and once again implore us to SHAKE THAT

_________________

Does Urkel really warrant such a long post?

Larry will go to Rio, find you, and rip your arms off

Youre now in Larrys "needs an ass kicking" priority line