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Holy shit guys, with all of this damn White Sox baseball I completely slept on THE PEOPLE'S HOUR.... and you know on wednesdays the mild-mannered People's Hour looks in the mirror, stares at its bare exposed soul, and Hulks out, becoming... HATER WEDNESDAY!!!
9:23 - I turn on the show and the first caller is some homo calls up and says "I gotta make this Lover Hour because I love this segment, I love your show, you're the best Laurence" This is a brilliant move, because much like Howard Stern, THE PEOPLE'S HOUR calles are heavily screened and set up to make the project look good. Laurence is a student of broadcast history and often incorporates elements and ideas from other shows to his own show. CASE IN POINT: One night I texted Laurence and said "dude, can you stop doing that "Caller, you're on the Score... and you wanna talk about Subject?" I reminded him that this was remedial college radio. Laurence quickly responded via text "hey, steve dahl does that. He does it to keep the show moving and keep people on topic, and I think Steve Dahl knows what he's doing on radio" THAT = SHAKEN. i never again questioned laurence.
Anyways, the caller kisses the ring and blathers about something on facebook which nobody cares about, but deftly sets up what we DO want, which is non-sports ranting from our brazen leader SHAKE THAT. Laurence, as you surely know, is the norse god of facebook, so he took teh cue and decided to give us what we want: his views on facebook. He's hating on facebook friends who add him to groups... He says if you do that he's going to delete you right away cuz he doesn't mess around with stuff like that because his time is too valuable. Here's a guy who often spends 2+ hours a day on facebook talking to the people, spreading the seeds of the revolution that takes place each night at 6pm, and you're going to dare to waste his valuable time by grouping him while he's trying to talk to the people? for shame. THIS IS A MOVEMENT THAT CANNOT BE STOPPED!
So to you faithful LoHeads who read this thread: DO NOT ADD LAURENCE TO YOUR FACEBOOK GROUPS! Laurence will delete your ass quicker than THE GOLF* did me when I outwitted him in his own posts.
* = indelible proof that laurence had read my posts later.
- A very suicidal caller #2 then gets on the air and decides to take his life in front of millions of people who can pick up the 50k watt signal. The second caller is hating on this bit! Yes, in fact, he's hating on HATER WEDNESDAY because he doesn't give a fuck abotu what some random idiots are hating on in their boring day to day lives! The caller says that this show is supposed to be about the Bulls, Bears, Cubs, Sox, and Blackhawks and that HATER WEDNESDAY sucks!
Laurence Holmes has come a long way, ladies and gentleman. As us dedicated LoHeads know, Laurence has a fuse so short it's been mistaken for Silvy's dick on countless occasions. We've heard tales of him nearly killing a pizza delivery driver... we know that the Score had to get rid of personnel like J-Hood and Tommy Williams because they pushed the wrong buttons and were roughly 3 seconds away from being beaten to death by Laurence... that's why they're fired. Laurence will work for the score as long as he wants because Mitch knows if he upsets the 192lbs of MAN that is Laurence Holmes he's going to wake up one morning and find his wife's severed head in bed next to him, or maybe all of his house's windows are broken... or even worse, Laurence pulls rank at CBS and next thing you know Laurence is the next program director, or if that's not high enough, Laurence will reveal that he's the only stockholder in CBS and therefore take over the whole media empire and make all of the changes that benefit him. While we play checkers, SHAKE THAT plays Global Thermonuclear War with the WOPR from "Wargames."
That was years ago, so now Laurence knows he needs to play off the facade of "man of the people" in order to grow the SHAKE THAT People's Army to the level where it could overthrow midwest and secede from America, so he had to handle this differently from his gut reaction. Laurence let out a clearly-pissed-off chuckle and said that most people like the segment, the segment works, and then in order to re-re-re-re-re-re-re-re-establish his treet cred says that HE CAN'T STOP AND HE WON'T STOP... LIKE BAD BOY * emphatic HUHHHH * and then he started humming some instrumental while he used handsignals to get his production team to add the caller's cellphone # to Laurence's Death Note. Ever seen the anime death note? It's based off of Laurence's ability to bring about swift systemic death to the haters just by merely writing their name down in a special notebook.
Call it a hunch this caller will never be heard from again..... Optimists will assume that Laurence and pals merely know to not accept calls from the guy, but Realists will know that in the People's Hour there is no room for treason. SHAKE THAT!
- Caller #3 has picked up on the brilliance of caller #1 and kisses the ring immediately, saying that this show helps him through many a long night and this segment is radio gold. Laurence smugly retorts "that's why I do this." Laurence snaps his fingers and the producers add the caller's vital info to the Nice List (as opposed to the Naughty List / Death Note) and the caller will soon receive a score gift pack stuffed with $20s. HAIL LOHO!
I listened in amazement as this segment which I joined in-progress was on it's third caller, clearly Laurence had gotten some WSCR interns and nite-shift employees to call up and pump up the show because as I've documented over the months, the People's Hour is subvertively an outlet for Laurence to express his views and opinions on non-sports topics... therefore, to use a wrestling term, this had to be "a work" in order to pump up the people and get them to call up the show, which allows Laurence to add more names/phone #s/personal information to his database. This third caller hated on people who redeem lottery tickets in front of him in line...like how they hold up the whole damn line so they can redeem a $2 winning ticket and then use those winnings to buy more lottery tickets, which causes all kinds of pain and suffering as you have to stand and wait in line as a scratch-n-win junkie gets their fix. Laurence quickly perked up and took the caller's torch and ran with it:
STORYTIME WITH LAURENCE HOLMES, BROUGHT TO YOU BY LMFAO: SHAKE THAT!
- Laurence's car is in the shop, therefore he has to venture into the filthy world of proletariat piblic transportation. Laurence qualifies that he loves public transportaton, except for the Bus (which has its own special brand of "crazy") and the L is ok... but he loves the metra. This declaration seemingly had no real reason to be mentioned, seeing as he was only talking about convenience stores, therefore I am led to believe that Laurence mentioned this everyman/public-trans nugget in order to once again convince us, the proles in the audience, that He (peace be upon him) is one of us. Anyways, presumably after taking public transportation, he was at a Walgreens on 47th street in the neighborhood because he needed G2. Yes, Laurence isn't one of us inbred hicks who still calls it "Gatorade" oh no, he's part of the hip All-In generation that calls Gatorade by its proper name, G2.
Fiending for his G2, Laurence and his fuse that's shorter than the list of supermodels that I've fucked is about to buy his precious G2 when he spots THE ENEMY, that guy at the store who is going to buy their brand of cigarettes but always browses over his choices before getting the same BRAND (this post sponsored by Elmhurst Steve Painting, Ltd: specializing in every color in the rainbow, except for black). Laurence realized he had to move quickly and get in front of this guy "before there was an incident"
YES, ALLOW ME TO REPEAT THAT IN A GIANT FONT AND ALL CAPITAL LETTERS. LAURENCE HAD TO GET IN LINE IN FRONT OF A GUY WHO WAS GOING TO BUY CIGARETTES *****BEFORE THERE WAS AN INCIDENT*****
This poor unsuspecting gentleman had no idea of the world of pain he was on the verge of entering. I've heard off-the-air stories about Laurence having to punch out a pregnant mother because he had to wait for her to get a book of stamps at Walgreens. She suffered 6 fractures of her nose/face and had a collapsed lung, while the baby would grow up with mental retardation and a crushed larynx, therefore it only communicate via whistling, leading to a nickname of "whistler". With all that in mind, can you imagine what Laurence would do to a middleaged man there for CIGARETTES?! Let's just say that death would be preferable.
At this point Laurence donned an accent of a southern white hick/redneck, for everyone knows it's perfectly OK for black guys to be as racist as they want to be whenever they want to be because some of their ancestors were enslaved by some people who happened to share the same skin color as me ~250-350 years ago. In a perfect southern-cracker white guy drawl, Laurence impersonated "Can I have some Marlboro Reds? Y'all ain't got none of those? Dang.... Uhhhhhhhh.... Can I get some Ultra Lights?"
Immediately, I called up the blackest friend in my cellphone's contact list and apologized for being white. He accepted my apology and said that next time I see him he's more than happy to give me 37 lashes on the back and hang me from a tree in the name of reparations.
Laurence would go on to laugh his way out of the call into the next caller, which flabbergasted me as we have managed to have FOUR CALLERS IN A SEGMENT DURING THE PEOPLE'S HOUR, which means they all had to be plants/works in order to promote the concept of the People's Hour. Anyways, the caller predictably kissed Laurence's ring (see a recurring theme here?) brazenly proclaimed that HE'S NOT SITTING BACK RELAXING AND STRAPPING IT DOWN! (of note, Laurence has been jacking Hawk Harrelson's catchphrase for his show, fully knowing that Hawk will never say anything to him because there would be an "incident") HE'S HERE TO HATE ON SOME LAZY ASS ALDERMAN! He then went on to talk about some bum alderman from his ward who got re-elected while a good woman that he knew lost to him in the election.
Laurence knows us better than we know ourselves, so he immediately went off into a tangent about another relatively famous guy who ran for mayor... Che "Rhymefest" Smith, a local rapper from Chicago who was on the verge of blowing up at one point a few years ago, and has now settled down back in Chicago and decided to run for Alderman in the 20th ward. Laurence immediately namedropped Rhymefest, saying that he felt bad that Rhymefest lost. You see, Laurence casually ran into Rhymefest once AND THEY EXCHANGED PHONE NUMBERS (my dick is hard with excitement: admit it, yours is too) and were like "yeah, you gotta come on the show sometime!" So after saying he felt really realllllllyyyy sad that Rhymefest lost, Laurence proudly proclaimed that they're going to have Rhymefest on sometime! He then blathered about something else before reiterating the Rhymefest story and repeating that WE'RE GOING TO HAVE RHYMEFEST ON THE SHOW SOMETIME!
How cool is that? Dan Bernstein TALKS aobut seeing Eric B and Rakim back in the day, you know, he talks about rap he likes... SHAKE THAT talks about rappers who he knows and has phone numbers to (alas, I've only got Louis Logic's cellphone # in my phone) So for the next minute intermittently mixed with some babble, Laurence reminded us that we're going to have Rhymefest on the show soon! That's so cool! ONLY SHAKE THAT has the street cred to get rappers on his show.... in contrast, Jason Goff has so much street cred that rappers are afraid to do his show, cuz they know this pudgy black dude from the Belize neighborhood of Evanston would make them look like Norman Rockwell in comparison. Laurence then started singing a hook to a rhymefest song for ~20 seconds and then said "HEY HERB, ONLY 2 PEOPLE FROM THE SOUTHSIDE ARE GOING TO GET THIS REFERENCE!" -- ESOTERIA ESTABLISHED!
Thoroughly titillated and in sudden need for a proper ejaculation, I ran off to service myself while Laurence went to Zach Zaidman for an update.
[UPDATE]
- 9:33 - Laurence comes out of the update and immediately bites me, by stating that "THE GOLF" is on from 10-midnight after his show. I've been calling Jason "THE GOLF" for a good ~8 months here on the CSFMB, so I had to immediately go back and jerk off again because I know that LAURENCE HOLMES READS MY POSTS OMFG!!! Thankfully, my jag-dungeon has a radio so I kept on listening. Laurence decided to reiterate his feelings about public transportation: He doesn't like buses due to the special kind of crazy on them (*waves*), he doesn't mind the L, and he loves the metra. He's not down with buses cuz he doesn't like it. He grunts. He's hating on that.
- A caller comes on the air and hates on it when someone has wrong information. The caller then goes on to say that someone earlier in the show/day/etc had called up and talked about the Original Six NHL teams doing something 54 years ago, when, DUH, it was 44 years ago. He then proceeds to start giving a history lesson about the NHL, which draws the ire of Laurence, who you can hear breathing heavier in the background filled with rage. After the caller speaks his piece, Laurence immediately calls him Grandpa Simpson and makes a few other jokes that basically rip on old white people. I had to call up my Black Friend's grandpa and apologize for being white AND aging. He accepted my apology and said he'd be over to burn a cross on my front lawn later tonight, so I'm looking forward to that. I've got some cocktail weenies that I'm goint to roast on teh burning cross.
- Next is a round of texters (I KNOW, RIGHT? THIS IS A RECORD FOR PEOPLE BEING A PART OF THE PEOPLE'S HOUR) is absolutely sick of and therefore hating on people who want "the hookup." He cites the fact that he works at a video store with $1 video rentals and how he's got friends who bitch and moan when he won't give them the hookup, in this case, getting to rent $1 movies for free. The caller started to hate on jerks laying on the horn laying in traffic, and then starts to hate on a kind of woman he calls "lotto women" (women who think they hit the lottery by going out with you, who is about to pay for everything).
Laurence found no tangents leading to comedy gold here, so he reads another text that hates on Women from the 80s and 90s for not being as hot as women are today. Laurence chortles and tells him to slow his roll because he went to DePaul in the 90s and there was a generous helping of "thick" girls at DePaul in the 90s. Laurence chuckles incredulously at the suggestion of the texter, letting us know that if we had been as cool and slick as Laurence to be at DePaul in teh 90s, we'd clearly know that the thick girls with a bit of junk in the truck held it down like they was drownin the bitch... once again, that's our loss because we're not hip and cool enough to roll in the Laurence Holmes social circle, one which includes rappers and Bears players and the legendary 5th story that he broke five years ago. In due time, friends, in due time we're going to find out the legend of the 5th story that Laurence Holmes broke. SHAKE THAT!
- Back to the callers, next up is caller Eric who hates on drive thrus and their employees who jerk you around all the way from the menu to the window and then give you a bag of food without a straw for the drink in it, despite your explicitly asking them if there was a straw in the bag. The fast food places are LYING to caller eric, and he says that these people aren't merely working a job, they're getting a preview of what the rest of their life is going to be like, seeing as they lack the ability to put a goddamn straw in the bag. Laurence pounced on this and pulled a seinfeld, asking what the deal with the drive thru parking lane is all about. Laurence HATES it when he orders food, he pays, and then they tell him to pull up and wait for his food while they serve other customers behind him. Once agian, these hapless fast food employees have no idea of what kind of hellfire they're about to unleash from Pandora's Box, or in this case, Pandora's Car. Having to pull aside/ahead and wait for his drive-thru food makes Laurence MAD.
Laurence wondered aloud "What if I say no? What if I don't want to pull up over there? Nobody wants to leave the restaurant after they've paid and before they've gotten food. "Do you wanna pull up over there?" "NO!" Laurence wondered what would happen if he said NO, I'M NOT PULLING UP OVER THERE! Would the line behind him get longer? Would he get a refund. "I'mma try that the next time they pull that... *fastfood voice* 'it's gonna be 10 minutes on the nuggets, want to pull ahead?' pzzzt. "NO! NO I DO NOT. I AM GOING TO WAIT RIGHT HERE FOR MY NUGGETS"
So in ~2 weeks when you hear about a case of drive-thru rage that makes the Browns Chicken massacre look like an accidental slip-n-fall on some ice in winter, then remember that it was Laurence Holmes, day-to-day anarchist, who dared to challenge the status quo and quite possibly eradicate the very fabric of society by irreparably destroying the foundation of all that makes us civilized by having the chutzpah to say NO when the drive thru asks him to pull ahead and wait for his food"
Herb Lawrence also wondered why the milkshake machines are often turned off at 10pm, but this was only a concern for us fat people, seeing as Laurence is in hellacious shape and cringes at the thoughts of him ballooning all the way up to 192lb. Before you think that's nothing, remember that Laurence is 4'3" tall so 192lb wears pretty heavy on him.
Laurence then quickly saved face and reminded us proletariats in his listening audience that McDonalds has a campaign where they're hiring 50,000 people nationwide and roughly 500 in chicagoland, so if you need a job you can go get one at mcdonalds. He says it's good work and an honest job, which is honorable. Know your place, peasants, it takes a special breed of Chosen-Few to be able to DO WHAT WE WANT at 9pm on every weeknight, sox games notwithstanding.
- Next up was a caller who works at a liquor store, and his boss asked him if he wants to go to an upcoming Beer Expo in the near future. Instant WIN, so he thought, cuz he could get paid to go hang out somewhere and drink a bunch of exotic beers and essentially have a proper holiday.... but then the boss left him crestfallen when he tossed in that he would have to drive to the expo, thus eradicating his plans for a lazy hazy drunken good day. Before Laurence would go on to exposition about his own tangential story related to this topic, the caller quickly kissed the ring and said that he loves the show, he loves the segment, and he makes it a point to listen every week. Laurence smugly thanked him and got to the obvious exposition (because it's the PEOPLE'S HOUR, LAURENCE DOES WHAT WE WANT)
- One of Laurence's first jobs near the end of college was working @ an office during his last semester. His boss was a bodybuilder dude who was "WHACKED OUT OF HIS MIND!" The guy would chew on coffee beans instead of drinking coffee like a normal person. He reiterated: HE CHEWED ON COFFEE BEANS! This was one of the weirdest guys he has ever worked for (which begs the question: who's weirder? I'm thinking DANNY BURN STINE) and therefore he couldn't imagine being trapped in a car with him for any amount of time.
Time for a break.
- Out of the break, a pre-screened planted levity call was inserted. This caller called to HATE ON LAURENCE. Laurence summons all of his strength to hold in the rage, faking a chuckle and says "that's ok" even though we know it isn't. He surely motions to his producers to add this guy's vital info to the Death Note. The guy continues on with his hate for Laurence by saying that after his big long rant about hating people who invite him to facebook groups, Laurence Himself had invited this guy to a facebook group. Laurence quickly squased that by saying that isn't him, to which the caller responded something incoherent about CBS.com or something, and Laurence catches on and dismisses him as he hangs up on him. Clearly, to answer Cam'ron's timeless question, yes, LAURENCE MAD.
- Laurence then encounters a caller who hates on those guys who call you up like "you wanna hang out? Cool, let's go out to a bar-n-grill and have a few beers get a meal and watch the game" and then when you go, they end up welshing on most of the tab and essentially had invited you out to pay for their drinks/meal ((editor's note: back in my hometown there was this guy who was a friend of a friend who was like that. he'd come over while we were chilling and be like "hey, you guys wanna smoke a bowl?" we'd be like "hell yeah" and then he'd be like "cool, have any weed?" -- BEEN THERE DONE THAT, LAURENCE!)) and essentially they'd perfect the art of Welshery. Laurence saw radio gold in this and decided to take it on a tangent, because once you talk about people who set you up to welsh THAT sets Laurence off: he immediately cuts off/hangs-up-on the caller and waxes poetic on how women nowadays are more and more "lotto women". He then dons a woman's voice that would make the Kids in the Hall proud and begins playing out a comedically-exaggerated situation where a stereotypical black woman asks you out, runs up a giant tab, then starts to welsh out. Laurence does a ~45 second skit where he plays that stereotypical black woman, and I'd try to recreate the greatness but I shan't desecrate his greatness by attempting to recreate it... go download the podcast. Long story short, much like he brilliantly stereotyped grizzled middleaged white men with their cigarettes at walgreens, Laurence don't love them contemporary hoes who act like they just won the lottery cuz they're going out for free tonight, on your tab.
Laurence is left doing the radio equivalent of shaking his head about these fucked up hoes nowadays, cuz i mean, comeon. Indeed you HAVE won the lotto when you're spending an evening on the town out with SHAKE THAT (and notice I said EVENING, not NIGHT, because the best part about a night with SHAKE THAT is that you get your activity/dinner/alcohol in you and you're back home in time to catch Craigy Ferg, aka Craig Ferguson.
Following in the Howard Stern Show's footsteps, Laurence then takes the no-doubt-planted-call into a tangent about this restaurant called "Tavern on the Park" which is right down by Millennium Park. He talks about going down there and "OH MY GOD IT WAS GOOD!" Much like Howard Stern has written signed affidavits for some legal shit about how sponsors often pay him to work in advertisements for their product "in the entertainment portions of the show" Laurence deftly managed to plug the shit out of a restaurant while convincing us that it was part of the show... maybe he's not directly paid, but word will get back that he mentioned them and he'll get a free meal? Anyways, Laurence manages to keep on gushing over the place, casually namedropping 3-4 of the managers/owners names, and says if you're ever downtown by the bean/millennium park "GO TO TAVERN ON THE PARK. YOU'LL HAVE A GOOD TIME AND YOU'LL HAVE A GOOD-ASS MEAL"
CHA-CHING.
- Next is caller dewayne, who's hating on getting old, as he's soon to be turning 27. It is flagrantly obvious that this guy is either a) performing a bit or b) gay for laurence and timid about admitting it, because when he was talking about something he slipped up on a terminology about balls or something that ended up being a gay double entendre. somewhere after that "mis-step" he talked about strenuous physical activity and when he was done his knees hurt SOOOOO BAD and he hates turning old. Laurence fakes a HA HA and starts to make up some general shit about getting old, either completely blowing off the reference or being too good for it. this guy basically told laurence that he sucks so much dick that his knees hurt, and before laurence can be made a fool of BRENDAN MCCAFFERY, aka BALDY MCGRINDY, aka B-MAC chimes in and closes out the people's hour with WHAT WE WANT: score producer/host softball/basketball/athletics talk.
I don't know about you, but there's nothing I love hearing more than tales about the athletic exploits of the "young" score guys. Laurence points out that he's the oldest of the "young" guys, even tho he's 35 and CAPTAIN SERIOUS MATT ABBATACOLA is 37, Laurence acts older than Drinkeeeigh because he can go out for the night and be home in time for Craigy Ferg. Anyways, the next ~10 minutes is spent talking NOTHING but Score athletics... Evidently there's some league-type superpickupgames going down on sunday morning and they're short a few players and they invite Laurence to go. Laurence likens the situation to the last episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation where at the end Captain Picard, having been to the possible future where he's old and detached from the crew, so he goes to play Poker with them. He says he should have done this a long time ago, and Riker tells him that he was always welcome.
U SEE GUISE, LAURENCE'S GEEK CRED IS THROUGH THE ROOF!! HE CAN TAKE SOMETHING MANLY LIKE SCORE-PRODUCER-LEAGUE ATHLETICS AND TURN IT INTO A STAR TREK REFERENCE!!
- Anyways, after the obligatory diss of Nick "Five Feathers" Shepkowski's basketball skills (he is white, after all, and a hockey fan... and since there is an active Basketball vs Hockey race war going on for the heart and soul of our country, no matter how much you try you can't avoid it) they started talking about this and that before B-Mac did the biggest NO-NO on the score: HE DISSED THE GOFF'S BASKETBALL PLAYING STYLE, SAYING THAT GOFF EITHER RUNS YOU OVER OR CALLS A FOUL ON YOU. OH SNAPS!
You see, Jason Goff is like me... a pudgy 6'3"/6'4" guy who plays big in most pickup games. Jason has worked hard to cultivate the most "street" image on the score, as he's the resident black guy who every show turns to when issues of color come up. He carries himself like he obviously has street cred, descending from the island paradise of Belize and growing up on the rough streets of Evanston (hey, I've actually heard that if you know someone you can buy crack on Dodge Street right by the highschool... true story! This guy tried to sell me crack on the 250 bus and said if I ever need it just come down Dodge Avenue and ask for C, aka shorty C) and like, if you haven't noticed, everyone on the Score defers to Jason as the be-all/end-all of all things Black/Street/Etc.
In this case, calling out THE GOFF's aggrssive style of basketball ended up bringing in THE GOFF, who quickly defended his style of play. After going over his rebounding fundamentals, he's going to look down court. If the only person in his way is shorter (and whiter) than him, he's going to go straight to the basket. He knows that people don't take charges in pickup games (which is mainly because nobody wants to bitch out and call that foul) and therefore uses that to his advantage as he beastorizes over all of these shorter/whiter score show producers. Goff came on and held down the floor as the big man on campus, because everyone bows down to the GOFF. Laurence will tell everyone "hey, i'd hit them!" whereas people probably think that Jason Goff might actually hit you, cuz you know, hanging outside of Gigio's Pizza in downtown Evanston used to be hard as shit. Ever been to Gigio's in the 90s? Exactly. They shoot white people on sight. In fact, if you haven't been to downtown Evanston lately, you'll find it looks just like Chicago Avenue between Pulaski and Homan, just a little bit closer to the lake.
So yeah, the last 10-15 mintues of the show was basically a bunch of Score producers/hosts sitting around talking about playing pickup games of basketball. Enthralling radio.... seeing as I missed my dose of HARD BAKE aka BAKE THAT tonight, this more than made up for it... there's nothing more I love than pretending in my head that I was cool enough to play pickup basketball with these guys.... would I get bowled over by Jason George Goff? Would I be able to guard Laurence when he plays the point and shoots the occasional jumper? Would I be able to play given the raging hardon I have from being around RADIO CELEBRITIES whose voices illuminate the perpetual darkness which I exist in? Wow.
I was swamped after all of that... it was ~37 minutes of sheer brilliance, and in the end SO MUCH WENT DOWN that it took me an hour or two to write all of this up. That's what you get with HATER WEDNESDAYS, you get RADIO GOLD, if not RADIO PLATINUM. You get to hear random people bitching about random shit, Laurence's thoughts on everything, and then random people bitching about random people bitching about random shit. I might have to risk being put on the Death Note just so I can call up and be one of those random people bitching about random people bitching about random people bitching about random shit. It's like mystery science theatreing people who are mystery science theatreing the people who mystery science theatre mystery science theatre, you know, it's like when you have two mirrors directly across from each other and when you look into one you end up seeing an infinite vortex to another world.
Was I entertained? <Sarah Palin> YOOOOOUUU BETCHA! </Sarah Palin>
Did I waste ~2hrs of my life writing up this dredge that nobody reads? <Sarah Palin> YOOOOOUUU BETCHA! </Sarah Palin>
Was I actually inspired by "Jbi11s" saying that my PEOPLE'S HOUR posts are the best thing on the board lately?<Sarah Palin> YOOOOOUUU BETCHA! </Sarah Palin>
In the future, I won't go all out with epic descriptions like this.... I'll just go back to my more concise breakdowns/commentaries... it's just that I hadn't been in this thread for a long time, so I had to make up for lost time.
So everyone, have a great night... and as always, my fellow LoHeads, when life has you down and you feel like there's no point to it all.... when the world seems like it's about to collapse under the weight of $6/gallon gas (think of it as a veritable peasant tax. and you can't do anything about it! YEAHHH GAS BOYCOTT NEXT FRIDAY LET'S SHOW THEM THAT WE MEAN BUSINESS (by filling up on thursday/saturday and, naturally, driving to said rally. maybe this is part of a master plan to eradicate driving?)
enough of that. my fantasy baseball team sucks and so do you.
# sir talksalot
_________________ Curious Hair wrote: Les Grobstein's huge hog is proof that God has a sense of humor, isn't it?
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