Bring back Dan Azzaro for weekend overnights. The shit on now sucks.

Once again I will be listening. Its like driving passed a bad accident & trying not to look. I cant help it.

"I'm Steven Berger live, talking Chicago sports".

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CSFMB 2014 Nascar Pick 'em Champion

We don’t have a trillion-dollar debt because we haven’t taxed enough; we have a trillion-dollar debt because we spend too much. — Ronald Reagan

lol i'm with you on the "live" thing.... personally i'm waiting for him to add "on the radio" to that cuz if i didn't know any better i would think i was listening to a pre-taped podcast on my old walkman lest steven boldly step forward and remind me otherwise.

hey scorehead, if you're bored feel free to take advantage of my au gratis space/bandwith and take a listen to the theoretical armada that ya bw0y admiral james danger awesome (aka emessiah) would load up and roll out to counteract the nefarious forces of the antichrist (quite possibly lil b from the pack, aka THE #BASED GOD?!). naturally, this grand delusion of grandeur is contingent on time travel eventually becoming possible cuz if there were ever any contact with people from the future who have time travel capabilities, one could semantically that "the end times" would be upon us because at the point where the future connects with the past there'd essentially be, in terms of the big picture, the end of days because once there's a convergence of past and future the resulting multiverse of infinite timelines would change the paradigm of how we as temporally linear beings view time. i personally don't believe that, say, someone were to go back in time and kill their own father that they would cease to exist, or that there'd be some sort of a paradox where everything is destroyed. moreover, a seemingly-infinite cavalcade of multiverses would open up and spread out related to each individual time jump.

then again, time travel is really really impractical because people always seem to forget that the planet is constantly moving through space, therefore if you were to do a neat little jump you'd have to calculate some sort of coordinates and then the question remains if during the jaunt through time you'd disappear from the tangible perception of reality to those who are progressing in a linear fashion, or if you'd be some sort of static fireball that would destroy anything unfortunate enough to touch it because, again presumably, being unprotected up against a fucking HOLE in the space-time continuum would likely cause some wicked shit to happen to you. sure it's a romantic view to envision captain jack harkness clutching on to the tardis for dear life while it glides through the time vortex, but in reality (lol) even with his seemingly infinite capacity to reanimate/resurrect, methinks he'd have some sort of issue related to molecular stability if his human flesh, immortal or otherwise, were exposed to the raw potential/energy that we, AGAIN, assume would come with some sort of temporal/time-jump.

my best guess is that if you found a way to reverse/rewind or fast-forward time you'd want to bury yourself deep in the planet itself and find a way to enclose yourself in a pod that has a shell that tangibly exists in a normal linerally-progressing/regressing timeline, however, inside of it there is a way to distort time and either speed it up compared to everything outside or even turn it back in such a way that it doesn't rewind YOU so you could then emerge at whatever point in time unscathed without having to worry about the whole thing where the planet is constantly orbiting the sun whilst rotating on the 24hr spin cycle so like, shit, you'd have to be some kind of mathematical genius or even a contemporarily-unfathomable supercomputer to come up with the math for that.

so for shits and giggles let's just assume that time travel is possible because in a fit of outright desperation in my last few seconds before death i somehow manage to ditch ye olde corporeal form and turn into a higher-level being of pure energy/consciousness/etc and therefore find a way to recreate memories in my head in such a way that for all intents and purposes i get there, well if that's possible maybe i can go back to 33BC and talk to yeshua bin yosef (jesus christ is a greek term for "one who was anointed") and, given that i learn whatever the native tongue is at the time, communicate some key concepts to him..... welp, then i'd probably be able to pop around to a few places between 33BC and ~325AD when the council at nicea meets and make sure i use some OMFGMAGIC to get my shit in the bible so that way when i read it nowadays and survey everything relative to my thoughts/theories/hopes/dreams/selfishly-solipsistic view of life, i can follow the clues i left for myself in the bible and LOL when i realize that the four horsemen of the apocalypse are actually professional wrestlers and that burritoy rapper lil b is the antichrist and like, furthermore, jesus isn't anything more than a good story because, technically, he's just a biter.

YOU SEE, GUYS?!?! these are the kind of deep thoughts that occur to somebody when they stop and take a few minutes to ponder the greatness that is THE. STEVEN. BERGER. SHOW. seriously, who the fuck isn't down for some berger bites tonight?!

SINCERELY,

# THE TL;DR-TASTICALLY OVER(SHIT)POSTING SOLIPSISTIC NARCISSIST DU JOUR WHO HAS THE AUDACITY TO NOT ONLY CLAIM THAT HE'S GONNA MAKE AN E-MOO/17-#BASED RAP ALBUM, MOREOVER HE MIDASWELL BE JESUS DAMN CHRIST WHILE HE'S AT IT CUZ NOTHING SOUNDTRACKS INSANE DELUSIONS OF DIVINITY QUITE LIKE A COUPLE'A HOURS WITH STEVEN FUCKING BERGER.

SHOMER SHABBOS * POUNDS TABLE *

oh wait, fuck, it's sunday now. what's the yiddish for like, IMPORTANT/GOOD SUNDAY?! i need a table pounding slogan in some sort of an ancient tongue to sound all official and justified and ancient (a phrase i got the randazzler to say on a 50k watt torch of righteousness that, being nighttime and all, likely reached ~30-45% of the country via the radio airwaves, a veritable high 5 to all of the other JAMs out there) cuz like, holy shit, am i REALLY gonna sit here and break down things the bergermeister says in relation to the sports topics of the day? unless there were some major undertakings between the WAKE AND BAKE CLUB signoff and THE. STEVEN. DAMN. BERGER. SHOW. like, shit, quoteth jawbreaker "if you can't be the life of the party you'll be the death of everyone."

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so there you have it, kids. all of the ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^quality drivel defenestration up there^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ is 777% likely to be the leading reason that i never had a chance in hell to get the coveted overnight weekender gig because like, quoteth george "rufus" carlin, these are the kind of thoughts that kept me out of the GOOD colleges. DOMINGO GIGANTE! * POUNDS TABLE *

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HELL YEAH YA BWOY THREADKILLA STILL GOTS THE MAGIC TOUCH UP IN HERE!!!!!!!

haaa I might technically be an oddball who has the propensity to spam goofy half-trollin "DJ mixes" but holy shit I'm definitely amused. I played a little game with myself to see if I could scare score head off with an eclectic combo of music, spam, excessive babbling, stream of consciousness rambling, and for good measure a hearty dose of time travel thoughts neatly wrapped up with that living touch of solipsis. Seriously, try it sometime. Just look in the mirror / empty reply dialog box and say it with me I'M JESUS CHRIST BITCH. People are so conditioned to stay in their little conversational paradigms that when you take things to dimension X on them you can smile knowing that they're undoubtedly touching their ad hominem defense mechanism/s to proudly pipe up and possibly vocalize "WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU" cuz when you do the job correctly ppl wanna keep their distance and stay in the realm of the known un/knowns. Don't forget that the acronym for "strength in numbers" is "sin."

So yeah while I still gotta be cordial, especially after the hardcore en masse rolling in the name of a British model chick (I got panther to call me up. That was suitably hilarious) last year, still there's the occasional night where you just kick back and let the verbal/mental spunkshooter go out and have an evening. The best part is that if you can write pretty well you're going to be convincing by default and no matter what you say and/or dis/claim otherwise ppl are gonna know better due to their preconceived notions of semantical pursuits of the contemporary conversational lexicon/paradigm so like, do ya thang but be committed to the csuse, you know?

TL;DR = rah rah rah i <3 talking shit on the internet cuz after many years of trying to be the best poster i could be and coming up short of my expectations, Welp, sometimes you gotta hijack your own Steven berger thread to talk about solipsis in order to conduct the kind of sociological/social experiments that usually require a paid focus group.

Oh yeah and I'm a temporally transcendental that you primitives COULD call Jesus because I'm the alpha timelord who eventually masters the concept of circuitous time loops and invents everything in my past to train me for the future where I create the stuff to litter throughout the past to remind myself that I exist. Ask Speeps or Beebo about the Bad Wolf; that show ripped off ideas I had @ age 14-15; ¡¡¡DOMINGO GIGÁNTE!!! Y'ALL

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"Good morning Chicago. I'm Steven Berger & today is Sunday October 24th".
You have an entire week to prepare your opening statement, & you screw it up. Bad. Very bad.
Berger & Gavin should be a show...somewhere.

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CSFMB 2014 Nascar Pick 'em Champion

We don’t have a trillion-dollar debt because we haven’t taxed enough; we have a trillion-dollar debt because we spend too much. — Ronald Reagan

Yea...sounded real good.

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CSFMB 2014 Nascar Pick 'em Champion

We don’t have a trillion-dollar debt because we haven’t taxed enough; we have a trillion-dollar debt because we spend too much. — Ronald Reagan

The Steven Berger experience is light years ahead of the Amy Lawrence debacle that follows it.

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Even Maya had a good, steady stream.

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You know me like that.

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I love Terry Boers. I hate Tim Tebow. The fact that the former will die before the latter show what a cruel, unjust world we live in.

I actually heard a few minutes circa the newfound 3:45am milestone. I'll say this: Steven is definitely more comfortable on the air, as he's speaking much faster and way more comfortably. Still though, his voice is far from being any sort of made-for-radio, as he just doesn't have that cadence/diction/meter/vibe that reaches out from your speaker/s and grabs you and compels you to follow the magic voice eminating from the voodoobox (using the mindset of a colonial american, anyways)

Since everyone said that Li'l Danny BurnSTINE was the #1 major advocate for getting Bergertime! a gig, I think it's pretty safe to put on your Beardown(TM) caps and assume that Dan was really behind Berger because he didn't want to get someone new in the station who could potentially do good enough to start warranting airtime during Weeknight/Normal-Weekend shifts, therefore costing "his guys" more chances at their proverbial radio lottery ticket. By getting a guy whose voice alone acts as a harbinger of no-future-in-radio, you've successfully stuck up for "your guys" (read underlings, disciples, lackeys) who will continue to provide numbers in case of any Der Schnorr brand civil war/s.

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Still more popular than Mike and Mike here.

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I don't remember half the time if I'm hiding or I'm lost

This and he's probably related to a sponsor, or is the nephew of someone Dan went to camp with, or both, or something. Then again, I have a hard time thinking Dan really gives a flying fuck whether someone gets a few 10-midnight shows at the expense of Matt Abbatacola or whoever else is on Team Bernstein these days.

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Wasn't Berger an Intern at the Score a few years ago? I still cant believe this clown won the contest.
There are probably at least a dozen guys on this board who would be more entertaining.

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CSFMB 2014 Nascar Pick 'em Champion

We don’t have a trillion-dollar debt because we haven’t taxed enough; we have a trillion-dollar debt because we spend too much. — Ronald Reagan

Yeah, a B&B intern, too. He was "Johnny Pizza," because Berger, burger, pizza, lawl.

This whole Score Search might have been the most embarrassing thing they've ever done.

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Hey, the first Score Search gave us Connor McKnight.

And it gave US chip egan.

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Oh no, I just meant this last one, where Leery blabbed that the top ten finalists were erstwhile interns and broadcasting colleagues and then Dan Bernstein picked his old intern. The Ten Foot Midget one was embarrassing, but I'm more embarrassed for us getting played.

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The TenFootMidget Debacle was an embarrassing time for us.

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How did we get played? By 'we' do you mean the CSFMB, or is it a more expansive 'we' that covers anyone and everyone who believed the Score Search was an actual contest that 'we' had a chance in? From what you said of 'Leery' blabbing, it sounds like all of the finalists in the Score Search were people who had already gotten their foot in the door of the station and therefore none of us "great unwashed" ever had a realistic chance.

Also, I do believe that Bernstein cares about the fate of his underlings and/or the station. If he's truly the FOTS and wielding some sort of power/influence over there, do you think he'd wanna risk anyone coming in and ruffling feathers amongst his underlings/disciples/people-who-have-kissed-the-ring? With great power comes great responsibility; ask uncle ben, that is, if he isn't up to his eyeballs in rice.

Berger was set up to fail. Not only is his show literally in the middle of radio nowhere buffered by ~2/+ hours of national dead air to effectively kill any continuity he'd have with local programming on either side, but he's just so technically overmatched in the art of radio that there's no way in hell that he gets anything other than whatever he was supposed to get for "winning" the "contest." Like I said way earlier in the thread, it's like they wanted to have a bad non-professional novelty show as opposed to getting someone who could actually develop into a bonafide show host that has a chance of making a proper career of it.

I mean, do you see this as the start of a long prosperous radio career for Steven, or do you think someday he'll be able to tell his buddies @ the office "hey, did you know I hosted a sports talk radio show for a year?"

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No, when Ten Foot Midget came on here and started participating normally to ingratiate himself with us in time for the voting, then turned around and went back to shit-talking the board.

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eh don't worry, the dude has gotten got since he did that. i made fun of him re: the pizza thing on twitter and it hit so close to home that after a gruff 'WHAT JOB DO YOU DO SO I CAN MAKE FUN OF IT?!?!" he turned around and ended up trying to work the pizza delivery guy angle so hard that it's even his custom background thingy.

it's ok, after you read his first column it was just..... i mean.... it spoke volumes, and not in the triumphant "hey i'm in the cool kids club guys" sense that he had intended for.

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I don't take anything away from him as it is just so difficult for a jewish man to get a foot in the door of the entertainment industry these days.

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

I look at it the opposite way. This guy has an absolutely clean slate to do anything he wants with two hours of air time and what does he do, a straight sports radio talk show. That kind of vision deserves the place in radio that he currently holds....but as we've discussed here so many times, this is exactly what Mitch wants out of the contest. He should be looking for the next North but instead he is looking for the next espnized nondescript talk host.

The search is set up to find nothing. Give 1,000 contestants 30 seconds each to talk and choose the best from that?

How about asking contestants to program their dream show for the 2 am time slot. That will show you creativity.

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

That contest was rigged somehow anyway. If I remember right, he and that other guy got north of 80,000 votes each. There's no way in hell 200,000 votes were being cast in that contest in any non-mechanized way.

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You know me like that.

This. I mean, yeah, it sucks that the contest was a sham, but it took about two sentences of that first Baffoe column to see how the sausage gets made. The station wanted another fan-baiting billionaire fetishist with highbrow pretensions, a middlebrow intellect (Fahrenheit? Seriously?), and access to a thesaurus. They got one, and then some.

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The Bulls haven't done anything wrong, and they're not going to do anything wrong.

Insofar as Dan Bernstein is a nouveau-riche meatball Sox fan who traffics heavily in racial theory, worships Jerry Reinsdorf, and thinks his show can tackle bigger topics than it actually can, he's the next Mike North.

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He sucked up to Bernstein for years. It wasn't surprising he did it to us for a few months.

When a chance to be a blogger opens up you do whatever is necessary.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

Again, bernstein is not really a Sox fan. That's just something he says on the radio. He's like North in that regard too. North was another "Sox fan". But it's hard to hide one's emotions when they are tied to a baseball team. bernstein's Sox talk mainly consists of mocking Sox prospects or ripping Beckham. His Cubs talk is loaded with him waxing poetic about the bright future. Does that really sound like a Sox fan to you? Same thing for North. He claimed to be a Sox fan but all his baseball memories revolve around the Cubs.

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Don't take it personally.

Regarding the contests that they've run over the last several years, the only conclusion I have come to is that the "decision" as to who wins is not made by the online voting (done so, in my opinion, to bring traffic to their website) or the judges that are involved in the remote (done so to promote a sponsor). It is made by someome or some people in management. The year I took part in the contest I thought I had a good shot at winning once I was named to the last 4 contestants. I thought the on-air portion where each of us got a half hour to do a sports update and sit in with Hub and Brian Paruch went well. However, during the week leading up to the remote where the winner was chosen a post on the chicagoradioandmedia.com board stated that the winner had already been chosen. That post was made on the Thursday before the event and the message stated "congratulations Connor McKnight". The post was made by someone who followed the industry pretty well and had posted a number of things before that were very credible. Initially, I thought that was the case-considering the source-and I felt pretty relaxed going into the remote. When it came time for the announcement of the winner I really thought I had done well enough to get the job. When Connor's name was mentioned, I immediately thought back to that post and realized that the winners are chosen beforehand.

Connor has done a nice job at the Score. I think he has a bright future in the business. As for those who have won the contest since, I don't know much. I've caught a bit of Berger's show and it is college radio at best. What will come in the future with the contest, I'm not sure. I've never found out what they look for in a winner, but we'll see.