Ladies and Gentlemen,

Some day, you may be able to heat your home using snark as fuel. You may be able to shower in warm nostalgic posts instead of hot water, and you might be able to dehumidify on hot summer days with dry wit, but until that day, a curious hair post can only provide comfort for a moment, whereas a Darkside can provide comfort for decades.

We can spend all day talking about guns and puppies but at the end of the day puppies only leave you with the need to wash you hands and do something about the faint piss smell in your house while guns can provide a lifetime of security.

Why choose piss smells and momentary joy when you can have years of comfort and safety?

Besides I have proof that Curious Hair sniffs the couch seat when you leave his house.

Vote Darkside. Vote for a year of brutal dictatorship and general brevity rather than the overly loquacious nitwittery of a bad haircut.

Two great posters. I'll go with Darkside.

I vote for that chap, Darkside. A man ain't a man unless he works with his hands. Mate.