The primary purpose of this, we now know, is to give me things to regurgitate witlessly during my show, not at all confident that I used it right, but still pretty pleased with myself

Enough about the primitive, fetishized fondling of the Stanley Cup, people

Just can't help himself.

Agreed. The fetishized fondling should only be done to dead crappers.

Only championships matter.
Don't celebrate championships.

That's basically what he is saying right?

Dan dreads the upcoming Bears training camp silliness especially since both baseball teams in town are no bueno.

http://chicago.cbslocal.com/2013/07/14/ ... -coverage/


I got a couple good laughs out of the article. Especially since I feel like he's poking fun at his own show with

"Matt Bowen Says Cool Stuff That We Can Repeat to Sound Smart. Whether in print, on-line or on air, the meticulously thorough analyst gives us terms like “Ace personnel package,” “Flat-seven combo” and “Spill to open-side contain.” The primary purpose of this, we now know, is to give us things to regurgitate witlessly in someone’s living room, not at all confident that we used it right, but still pretty pleased with ourselves."

Listen. It's the best show in town.

Only championships matter.
Don't celebrate championships.

That's basically what he is saying right?

Enough about the primitive, fetishized fondling of the Stanley Cup, people — we need to track Brandon Marshall’s receptions in seven-on-seven drills, then overreact to a post-whistle shoving match and unfairly question his professionalism and sanity!

Enough of the Stanley Cup, people — we need to track Brandon Marshall’s receptions in seven-on-seven drills, then overreact to a post-whistle shoving match and unfairly question his professionalism and sanity!

Enough about the primitive, fetishized fondling of the Stanley Cup, people

♬ Let's Explain Bernstein's Questionable Writing ♬

So basically, the tenor of this blogumn is a self-effacing, even self-flagellating "welp, here we go again with the Score's crazy stupid Bears coverage; gird your loins for that same old crazy stupidity!", which is fine enough, though for the sake of argument let's ignore that Dan is the lead host for five key hours of the Score's broadcast day and as such is eminently suited to change the tenor of the station, but bear (down) with me here.

So here we have this:



We're in some muddy water here. Again, the whole idea is that annual training camp coverage is excessive, hyperbolic, and inconsequential. No one would deny that: they say everyone is good every year and none of it ever means anything. The Hawks winning the Stanley Cup, however, doesn't happen every year, so it should follow that when it does happen, not as an annual matter of preseason course but as a rare postseason achievement, people should make a pretty big deal out of it.

Primitive, fetishized? What does that have to do with anything? By casting judgment on excitement over a championship, you obfuscate whatever your tenuous point was. So watch this magic trick:


Ta-da! Here, you are saying "stop doing something you should be doing and start doing something you shouldn't be doing!", which in its blatant counterintuition jibes with the whole "get on board with stupid training camp radio" premise. Referring to Cup fever as "primitive, fetishized fondling," however, scans as "stop doing something stupid and do another thing that is also stupid but offends my sensibilities less," which gets away from the piece's self-effacement and comes off as simply pouty and churlish. However, to deny Dan this sentence would be to deny Dan two of his favorite things in this world: coordinating modifiers and shitting on the Blackhawks. You don't tell WSCR's Senior Columnist how to write.

Bernstein doesn't think there are two Americas. What about Champaign-Urbana?

Or Lafayette-West Lafayette.

I am 100% lock step with Dan and Terrys views of the case and what happened....

What are their views?

I commend Baldy McGrindy for attending Gary's memorial service. For as much radio time spent reminiscing him, I consider attending his memorial truly the best way say goodbye.

I commend Baldy McGrindy for attending Gary's memorial service. For as much radio time spent reminiscing him, I consider attending his memorial truly the best way say goodbye.

so bernsies kid does the crossing genuiflect before getting on the field, but dad wont allow it. kid, if youre listening, its perfectly OK if you copy moistness alou its not against your religion to piss on your hands.