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3/31: Dan Craps Himself
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Author:  Dave In Champaign [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 1:37 pm ]
Post subject:  3/31: Dan Craps Himself

Remember when the Bears acquired Brandon Marshall, and Dan openly applauded the team for ignoring the fact that he's a serial abuser of women? Well, um, this is awkward, but

Quote:
Bernstein: Ravens Excuse Rice’s Violence
March 29, 2014 5:40 PM
By Dan Bernstein-
CBSChicago.com Senior Columnist


(CBS) – One NFL team cuts a player for merely keeping unsavory company, while another goes out of its way to make excuses for a guy who knocked his fiancée out cold in an elevator.

Here’s the video of what Ravens running back Ray Rice did to Janay Palmer. See for yourself. A New Jersey grand jury watched it, too, and was provided further evidence that resulted in a new, more serious charge of aggravated assault being added to the previous charge of simple assault from February 15th. Rice faces three to five years in prison if convicted.

This is all pretty much fine with the Ravens, who decided the best course of action would be a defiant, public show of support from ownership, and weaselly enabling by the head coach. Ray Rice knocked a woman unconscious, and they seem to think he’s a swell dude who just found himself in some unfortunate circumstances.

Welcome to Baltimore, where Ray Lewis is still a civic treasure despite being convicted of obstruction of justice after a double homicide. At the very least he knows who killed Jacinth Baker and Richard Lollar, and any reasonable person has concluded he probably abetted the crime and/or the getaway. This is the city where a video threatening witnesses to “Stop Snitchin’” was produced in 2004, proudly including famed resident Carmelo Anthony in the campaign to intimidate those who would help police investigate criminal behavior. In that context, then, turning your girl’s lights out is like being double-parked.

I’m still waiting for a local voice there to take issue with the Ravens’ insulting lack of judgment, hoping in vain for one person to use a professional space to call them out appropriately for all but condoning Rice’s actions. Owner Steve Bisciotti gave the verbal equivalent of two middle fingers to domestic violence victims, saying “I don’t know of any other player that’s ever generated as much goodwill in our building and in our community as Ray has in those six years.”

Lovely, right? And there’s so much more from the team’s website. “I have to have compassion for him,” Bisciotti said. “He’ll be back with the team. He’ll definitely be back. Ray has not experienced any [adversity]. He’s just been lauded as the nicest, hardest working, greatest guy on the team and in the community, so we have to support him.”

John Harbaugh, meanwhile, made sure the focus remained on the real culprit, demon rum. “When you drink too much in public, those kinds of things happen,” he said. “You can’t get drunk at a bar.”

So it’s not even just the drinking itself that somehow makes a player’s fists fly into a woman’s face otherwise against his will, it’s the fact that it was in public where prying eyes can see, and here we go with that whole Baltimore thing with witnesses, again. In Harbaugh’s world, presumably it’s better to get your load on behind closed doors, so nobody’s around to be snitchin’ if you throw a casual slap at the missus when she gets out of line.

Rice and Palmer just got married, and are said to already be in counseling, getting a head-start on the inevitable. Here’s hoping her wedding registry includes comprehensive health insurance and gift cards for the emergency room.

Husbands who do this tend to keep doing it, with the complicated, counter-intuitive pathology of the battered wife all now too well known. The dependent relationship creates the cycle of violence, contrition, and futile belief in positive behavioral change. And that applies not just for couples, but for teams and their star players.

It would be so easy for Bisciotti to express even an iota of awareness that Rice did a very bad thing, indicating some belief in there somewhere that this repugnant act is unacceptable to the Baltimore Ravens, and then allowing the legal proceedings to run their course. Instead, he sent the message that he accepts it, using an insolent tone that comes way to close to outright endorsement.

Baltimore is silent, but NFL commissioner Roger Goodell will have something to say.

Thankfully, so will prosecutors in New Jersey.

Author:  leashyourkids [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 1:49 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

Thought the same thing. Even for Dan, this is a huge crap.

Author:  donspiracy [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 2:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

Keeping Ray Rice gets the Ravens closer to a Championship.

Author:  leashyourkids [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 2:17 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

Is there a way to find anything written where he applauded the acquisition of Marshall?

Author:  SomeGuy [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 2:20 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

leashyourkids wrote:
Is there a way to find anything written where he applauded the acquisition of Marshall?


Podcasts.

He was saying "It's good that the Bears were finally able to look past "character" things and pick up a big whang whipper."

Or something of that nature.

Author:  Dave In Champaign [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 2:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

He wrote this--

Quote:
Great job dealing merely a pair of third-rounders for Brandon Marshall, the best wide receiver in franchise history (characteristic, troubling news from New York notwithstanding).


--but SomeGuy is dead-on in terms of what he said on the air. He lauded the Bears for acting like a Real Damned Football Team, ignoring provincial concerns like character, and acquiring a Big Black Stud.

Author:  rogers park bryan [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 2:57 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

I wonder how he would answer this

Author:  SpiralStairs [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 2:57 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

rogers park bryan wrote:
I wonder how he would answer this


Oh my GOD, why do you even care?!?

Author:  lipidquadcab [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 2:58 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

rogers park bryan wrote:
I wonder how he would answer this

I'd like to think he'd "just take it" were someone to bring this up Thursday...but I could also see him trying to find some way of explaining how this is different.

Author:  Colonel Angus [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 3:06 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

I thought this thread was predicting Dan would literally shit himself in studio on Monday.

Author:  Franky T [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 4:29 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

I don't remember the Bears management coming out to support Marshall like they are doing in Baltimore and I don't think he writes that article if they merely kept Rice on the team and didn't say anything. I guess that's a difference.

Author:  lipidquadcab [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 4:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

Franky T wrote:
I don't remember the Bears management coming out to support Marshall like they are doing in Baltimore and I don't think he writes that article if they merely kept Rice on the team and didn't say anything. I guess that's a difference.

I see the point you're trying to make about the Ravens supporting Rice but the Bears actively sought out Marshall, knowing what his past behavior was...not sure you can say that puts you on a higher moral standing than the team sticking up for a player who has been on their roster for years.

Author:  leashyourkids [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 5:14 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

Franky T wrote:
I don't remember the Bears management coming out to support Marshall like they are doing in Baltimore and I don't think he writes that article if they merely kept Rice on the team and didn't say anything. I guess that's a difference.


My response to that would be,"So you just want lip service against rape, correct? Not actual conviction."

Author:  rogers park bryan [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 5:18 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

leashyourkids wrote:
Franky T wrote:
I don't remember the Bears management coming out to support Marshall like they are doing in Baltimore and I don't think he writes that article if they merely kept Rice on the team and didn't say anything. I guess that's a difference.


My response to that would be,"So you just want lip service against rape, correct? Not actual conviction."

Hung up on before you finish the order 'against'

Author:  Franky T [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 5:23 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

leashyourkids wrote:
Franky T wrote:
I don't remember the Bears management coming out to support Marshall like they are doing in Baltimore and I don't think he writes that article if they merely kept Rice on the team and didn't say anything. I guess that's a difference.


My response to that would be,"So you just want lip service against rape, correct? Not actual conviction."


Of course! Don't forget who we're talking about.

Author:  veganfan21 [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 5:25 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

Has Dan ever ripped on a Chicago star in the same way as he rips on Rice, Alford, etc? Maybe he's soft to hypocritical on Marshall due to the score benefiting from access to the Bears? Bernstein is still disingenuous either way.

Author:  Zizou [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 5:36 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

I thought Marshall got a pass because he was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder.

Author:  leashyourkids [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 5:38 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

rogers park bryan wrote:
leashyourkids wrote:
Franky T wrote:
I don't remember the Bears management coming out to support Marshall like they are doing in Baltimore and I don't think he writes that article if they merely kept Rice on the team and didn't say anything. I guess that's a difference.


My response to that would be,"So you just want lip service against rape, correct? Not actual conviction."

Hung up on before you finish the order 'against'


I would never actually call. I prefer just to complain on the internet.

Author:  rogers park bryan [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 9:44 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

@dan_bernstein
Idiots on NBCSN think there needs to be a fight, because that um...somehow...um...helps the 'Hawks' cup chances? This is face-palm stupid.


#NHL's stagy "revenge" stuff is silly. Imagine #NFL teams acting as Shakespearean over injuries. If you're so tough, don't be drama-queeny.

Author:  Rod [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 9:48 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

rogers park bryan wrote:
@dan_bernstein
Idiots on NBCSN think there needs to be a fight, because that um...somehow...um...helps the 'Hawks' cup chances? This is face-palm stupid.


#NHL's stagy "revenge" stuff is silly. Imagine #NFL teams acting as Shakespearean over injuries. If you're so tough, don't be drama-queeny.


He doesn't understand hockey. If his kid is good enough to actually move up some levels as a goalie, he'll be the first guy screaming for what's necessary when some big goon sets up shop in the crease in front of Jason "Brodeur" Bernstein.

Author:  Powerhouse233 [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 9:56 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

Is fighting all he ever talks about when discussing hockey?

Author:  bigfan [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 9:57 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

The only way his kid moves up is that they need a sponsor.

One thing in the city, it's tough to find people to play hockey, it's expensive. The other 2 people I know with kids in his league are Doctors.

Same thing with "travel teams" on the North Side of the City. No kid who has parents that work 9-5 Blue collar jobs have their kid on a travel team and a house team. It's too much to shlep them around 5 days a week, unless of course you have "people" doing that for you.

Author:  Zizou [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 10:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

I got a feeling tomorrow will feature some heavy Calipari slurping by Beerstain.

Author:  Mr. Reason [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 10:52 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

Powerhouse233 wrote:
Is fighting all he ever talks about when discussing hockey?

Other than his son's borrowed, stinky equipment, yes.

Author:  KDdidit [ Sun Mar 30, 2014 11:10 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

Dan also sometimes mentions he wishes they could have guests on who can really educate people on the Xs and Os of hockey, since obviously anybody who watches is an idiot that needs educating.

Author:  Colonel Angus [ Mon Mar 31, 2014 4:54 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

I need to know, did Dan shit himself on air today? Did Terry say, "Who's making soup?"

Author:  redskingreg [ Mon Mar 31, 2014 6:48 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

Image

Author:  Powerhouse233 [ Mon Mar 31, 2014 6:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

Bernstein has a massive head and abnormally long arms. His hands are also too big for his height.

Author:  leashyourkids [ Mon Mar 31, 2014 6:54 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

Terry looks like the guy who used to wander into my grandma's room at her nursing home.

Dan looks like the younger guy who used to wander into my grandma's room at the nursing home.

Author:  Curious Hair [ Mon Mar 31, 2014 6:57 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: 3/31: Dan Craps Himself

I don't get the significance of red pants.

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