Smarmystein wrote:
Dan didn't like that the Royals wore goggles when celebrating their championship...
"they need to get rid of that!"
Dan not only KNOWS HOW to WIN but HOW to CELEBRATE!
Plenty of Catholics vs. Convicts hate today too!
the royals are one of those "teams of destiny" that mister "MOMENTUM IS TOMORROW'S STARTING PITCHER" is inherently predisposed to hate because he demands that we all believe in the ice cold grip of statistics in determining the one true path to total sports enlightenment; you don't go up to the plate to "make yourself dangerous" like hawk espouses, you go up there knowing that the pitcher has a 68% tendency to throw first pitch fastballs low and in to right handed hitters and then remember that you're hitting .143 against lefties with 95+ MPH fastballs and therefore you've gotta sit on the changeup because you're slugging .682 when you make contact with offspeed pitches when you're ahead in the count, and then you know that the CF's UZR rating is low so you're going to try and put the ball in the gaps unless they shift the defense on you in which case you also remember that your OBP is .480 when you're able to work the count to 2-0 or better, so therefore you better go up to the plate and make yourself ultra selective, that is after you take no less than 2 pitches because only a fool would deny all of these advanced statistics that tell you your greatest chance at having a positive at bat comes with patience and discipline and most importantly an encyclopedic knowledge of the pitcher/batter matchup thanks to you doing your homework.
meanwhile hawkeroo's guy up there at the plate simply thinks "man i'm going to fuck this guy up... he doesn't have a goddamn thing to get me out and he knows it!" and goes up there looking to hit the ball through the window of a robert taylor home.
one guy is one of rick telander's robots, the other is a human being. dan seems to inherently dehumanize the whole world of sports wherever he cans because to him everything is a statistic, an outlier, or a cromulent business decision because as always dan never grew up wondering how awesome it'd be to be michael jordan.... he grew up wondering how awesome it'd be to be michael jordan's boss.
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Curious Hair wrote:
Les Grobstein's huge hog is proof that God has a sense of humor, isn't it?