Heading out to make some new memories at beautiful Wrigley Field today. Got to make the most of it. It probably won't be long before the half-literate widow of a drunken cop forces a billion dollar corporation to move to Arlington Heights.

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Matthew, Tulsi, and Don

Wearing your 34 WOOD jersey?

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"That's what the internet is for. Slandering others anonymously." Banky
“Been that way since one monkey looked at the sun and told the other monkey ‘He said for you to give me your fuckin’ share.’”

First game ever was Braves/Cubs when Hank Aaron was approaching 714. Saw the New York Cosmos vs.Chicago Sting in '81. saw Tuffy Rhodes hit 3 HRs on Opening Day. Watched Steve McMichael get tossed for inciting the umpire during the 7th innning stretch before I headed over to metro to catch Living Colour. Saw The Police put on a decent show and nailed a massage therapist after the show who was in town visiting her parents from DC. Miss the pre-9/11 days of smuggling in beer with my awesome backpack cooler.

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Sex isn't dirty, sex isn't a crime. It's a loving act between two or more consenting adults.

-Hank Kingsley

That was a great game. Did you stay till the end? The Cubs came back, and there was that double rundown on the final play with Ricky Guitierrez sliding into home for the win.

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Oh yeah, it was a crazy night. I drunkenly stumbled over to Metro and uttered some gibberish to the guy at the door in hopes of catching the last set.

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Sex isn't dirty, sex isn't a crime. It's a loving act between two or more consenting adults.

-Hank Kingsley

New memories:

Got to park at about 1:00. Bought a 312 from a chick with huge jugs in the Captain Morgan club. Let me tell you, those jubblies were memorable, all right! Froze my ass off during the game. Another Cub loss. Bonifacio looked bad at second. The plate ump was wearing short sleeves and must have had an early dinner reservation. During the last two innings the strikezone was as big as the side of a barn. Guys from both teams were beefing, but I had no problem with it since it was getting real cold in the shade. Went over to Lincoln Tap and knocked back a few. Got a text from my wife who was out with her gays. Drove over to meet them at Sidetrack. Johnny Scruff will be making an appearance there next week if any of you are interested. https://twitter.com/johnnyscruff Had a couple more drinks and a gay "Koolaid" shot. Grabbed the one straight guy who was with them and headed out for dinner at Erie Cafe. My guy, Sasha the Ukrainian working the bar. Gotta remember not to make any Putin jokes. Sasha is very sensitive about Crimea. Had a huge prime rib. Went to O'Callaghan's for a nightcap. A bunch of cute girls in the upstairs bar. Finished the night with an Anejo. Said good night to Luca and the cops at the door and went home.

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Matthew, Tulsi, and Don

That would've been 8-9-88, right?
I couldn't get tickets for the first night, so I took the next night as well. Cubs/Astros, went with my sister and two buddies, we walked down to the rail between innings, Nolan Ryan was throwing in the bullpen for some side work. You could just hear the ball whistle through the air when he pitched

Probably my favorite memory was getting to watch Randy Johnson pitch from the first row down by the bullpen not too far from the Bartman seat. Game was supposed to be Johnson vs. Kerry Wood, but Wood was a late scratch. Johnson was awesome to watch in person. Looked like he was half way to home plate when he would release the ball

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

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