I listened to "Rain Delay Ranger" tonight. These are actual calls he took today. I'm gonna exaggerate Rangers reaction a little bit.

Ranger - Hello Joe, you're on the air.

Joe - Yeah. What's with Floyd yesterday? Mauer hit a low fastball. Da Sox have been doing this all year. Why don't dat Cooper fix it?

Ranger - You realize Floyd had a 1 hitter yesterday and the Sox pitching has been great all year.

Joe - I know dat. But I'm just sayin. Da low pitch gets hit a lot. I see a trend.

Ranger - I don't know what to say. Thanks Joe. Rick you're on the air.

Rick - Da other guy stole my thunder. I was gonna bitch about dem low pitches. So I'll ask you dis my friend. Who is yours favorite Sox of all time?

Ranger - Ummm Frank. Are we gonna do this? Ted you're on the Score.

Ted - We need speed in da line up.

Ranger - No. We need hits. Billy you're on the Score.

Billy - We need speed in da line up.

Ranger - No. We need hits. Speed is a luxury. We just need hits. Tom!!! Go!!!!!

Tom - We need speed in da line up.

Ranger - Fuck you and fuck speed!!!! Look, the tarp is coming off. Thank God. That's it for me. I'm gonna get a gun and blow my brains out. I'm Chris Rongey on the White Sox radio network. Farmer and Stone, with the call, after the break.

At least it's not July, aka ridiculous trade scenario season.

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Fire Phil Emery

Team speed, for Christ's sake.
Gimme them big cocksuckers that can hit the fucking ball out the ballpark and you can't make any goddamn mistakes.

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We all have private ails. The troublemakers are they who need public cures for their private ails.- Eric Hoffer

I bet that was what Chris Rongey was REALLY thinking after a couple of idiotic calls at the start of his rain delay call-in show! I know before he went to Sirius Satellite Radio, someone would make a similar, idiotic call to the likes of the late ABC Newsman Peter Jennings & CNN's Larry King whenever there was a breaking news story, and would mention Howard Stern's name at the end before he hung up the phone. At the same time, Terry Boers & Dan Bernstein have taken similar, idiotic calls that make no sense on their 670 "SCORE" afternoon show...

Shark1104, of CSFMB, makes a weird and pointless analogy. Shark is a new contributor on CSFMB.

I don't know. You have to do that with his job. He can only talk Sox baseball. There is only so much you can say. He has to kill time so he repeats himself. Rain delays make it more repetitive.

Considering the circumstances, I think Ranger does a bang-up job.

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We all have private ails. The troublemakers are they who need public cures for their private ails.- Eric Hoffer

If its fare its outta here!

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I got out of a meeting just as he began taking calls. While it may have sucked for Ranger, I thought it was great radio. Several of the callers sounded exactly the same, so I think someone was messing with Ranger.

Some guy called in as Good Doctor. That is coming dangerously close to infringing on my trademark. I want to put that person on notice that my lawyers will be subpoening phone records and you will be found.

I thought Noisewater was a Cubs fan?

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That's why he calls with over the top dumbass calls to make Sox fans look bad.

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"It's not exactly a rocket surgery." D.J.

I think you're right Good Dolphin. Some of it is callers screwing with Ranger. Some guys have a couple beers and decide to fuck with the guy on the radio.

I don't think Ranger realizes this. At least not while it's happening. He's so focused. He tries to be the "in control professional broadcaster" but sometimes he reaches a breaking point and gets sarcastic. He never totally loses it. One day he will snap.

Ranger is spending a long weekend with his new gal.