Twas the night before shitlist, when all through the UC
Not a player was trying, not even vinny
The nets were hung from the baskets with care,
In hopes that another coach would start the new year;
The fans were nestled all snug in their seats,
While visions of dwayne wade made their hearts go beat beat beat.
Garpax with his 'two headed voiceless stature',
While the rest of us settle down for a long awaited departure.

When out on the court there was rose, high in the air
I leaped from my seat while my buddy spilled his beer.
Away to the their side, the defense buckled down,
Tore open my jacket, to lay picket wood in the ground.
The teardrop floater in the middle of the lane,
Derrik rose is back! he is finally the same!
When, to my wandering mind should i remember,
We have a tall shot blocker, and kirk hinrich should be a starter.

With a little extra effort and a confident coach vinny,
Shots start going in, and tyrus is being stingy.
More rapid then hummingbirds derrik goes down the lane,
And he lost his mind, i think we already have our d-wade.
"Now Miller!, play less minutes harder!
On, Deng, on Salmons! Don’t get off the bench Pargo and Johnson!
To the paint on the court! To the basket let it fall!
Now dribble away! Cross away! Pass away all!

As tears dry when the home team plays like they try,
When all the hanus thoughts of the people who made me cry,
Turn into wishful thinking for the happy holidays,
Even for coach vinney; he’s actually not that bad of a guy.
And then, in a flashback, I heard in my head,
The dancing of chest beaters, still wanting vinny dead.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the back nine I say! Just keep coach vin around!

He was dressed all in Italian threads, from hair to hair,
And his face was all stressed and shit, no more ways to smear.
A bundle of joy the fans got back on track,
And Vinney no longer seems like a peddler all desperate and whacked.
His eyes— how they twinkled! His dimples are so sexy!
His cheeks no longer look like old man, his nose is still scary!
His drooly little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the by cracky from his face was black as usual

Nobody knew the coach smoked weed beneath his teeth,
But he could blow smokerings like a wreath!
Soon he put on a couple pounds here and there,
And if for just a couple games, he looked good besides his hair.
He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old Italian,
And no longer do I laugh when I see him, we are gellin
A shake of his rug and a political tone to his voice,
Soon gave me to know there would be no more noise.

He spoke of the same old crap, luvy-fied in a shell
But hes getting the job done, out of sheer will
And pointing his long nose at garpax, bullshit! bullshit!
Giving a nod to the players, “we are all on the same ship”
They all sprang to the step, to his team he gave the signal,
And away they played, maybe even a 3 game jingle!
But one last word for the guy who can’t win
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, EVEN COACH VIN!


i think we all have been a little hard on vinny. taking a job youre underqualified for is something we all have done, and he has stayed a man through the whole process. this also could be vodka talking, and ill edit later i just wrote half this, went to menards, then wrote the other half. the first thing i thought of was the last line. my heart was in the mood.

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