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 Post subject: Hawks @ Zombie Whalers
PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 10:47 am 
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PREDICTION: the dog is whoever writes for The Committed Indian today and the pillow is ADVANCED STATS. Everyone is in love with Carolina's ADVANCED STATS, which are a function of shooting a lot and not taking penalties. Apparently, this is some sort of revolution for the Hurricanes, but if you ask me, they look like the same Hurricanes they've been for years, where they play soft and pretty but lose a lot because soft and pretty doesn't work in the long run, at least not without defense, goaltending, and being able to assert yourself every once in a while. I mean, check this out: http://www.canescountry.com/2016/12/29/ ... cted-goals

This is everything I've read about the Hurricanes all year: "well, we were dominant in terms of our Boolean rebound metrics [?!?] but didn't come away with the win, sometimes you just have bad luck." Here's hoping the Hawks make bad luck for them, I hate this team's asshole ownership and asshole fans, more spoiled babies like the ones in Nashville. Imagine a fanbase that's nothing but hockey-hipsters because no one else who lives in Raleigh-Durham would give a shit, that's the Hurricanes fanbase. It's terrible, folks.

Unfortunately, this is the back end of a road back-to-back, a game in advance of a red-letter date, and a game in Raleigh, which all point to the Hawks not caring and getting throttled. If nothing else, light up Teuvo Teravainen; we gave up a lot to put him in a position to succeed last year and he didn't do it.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 7:57 pm 
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 8:00 pm 
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Whoops, didn't see. Should've known CH wouldn't let a chance to slag Carolina go by. Mods please delete my thread .

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 8:02 pm 
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badrogue17 wrote:
Should've known CH wouldn't let a chance to slag Carolina go by.

They might be moved to Quebec if Karmanos, who robbed his children's trust fund to cover operating expenses, has to sell the team. This dumb dick tried to sell the team last year but insisted on still being in charge of a team he wouldn't own anymore.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 8:04 pm 
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Curious Hair wrote:
badrogue17 wrote:
Should've known CH wouldn't let a chance to slag Carolina go by.

They might be moved to Quebec if Karmanos, who robbed his children's trust fund to cover operating expenses, has to sell the team. This dumb dick tried to sell the team last year but insisted on still being in charge of a team he wouldn't own anymore.

I'll never understand the logic of relocating back to a city that already lost a team .

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 8:07 pm 
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Gotta bury that Vinny.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 8:11 pm 
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badrogue17 wrote:
I'll never understand the logic of relocating back to a city that already lost a team .

Quebec City had an arena built in the 1940s with no air conditioning, the Canadian dollar was weak, and the league had no salary cap. Now, Quebec City has one of the finest arenas in North America, the league has a salary cap, and the Canadian dollar kinda sucks again but there are more hedges against it than there used to be, so 2.5 out of 3, I guess.

I guess I'll never understand the logic of sacrificing your backyard for growth opportunities instead of supplementing it. No doubt the NHL needed to move south and west eventually, but they should have protected the small WHA markets instead of letting them go to shit because Bill Wirtz and Jeremy Jacobs were still bitter over Bobby Hull and Gordie Howe.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 8:12 pm 
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Curious Hair wrote:
badrogue17 wrote:
I'll never understand the logic of relocating back to a city that already lost a team .

Quebec City had an arena built in the 1940s with no air conditioning, the Canadian dollar was weak, and the league had no salary cap. Now, Quebec City has one of the finest arenas in North America, the league has a salary cap, and the Canadian dollar kinda sucks again but there are more hedges against it than there used to be, so 2.5 out of 3, I guess.

I guess I'll never understand the logic of sacrificing your backyard for growth opportunities instead of supplementing it. No doubt the NHL needed to move south and west eventually, but they should have protected the small WHA markets instead of letting them go to shit because Bill Wirtz and Jeremy Jacobs were still bitter over Bobby Hull and Gordie Howe.


Quebec City would be infinitely better than Carolina or even Nashville.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 8:14 pm 
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I'd certainly rather see a good Canadian city get/keep a team over the shitty apathetic US south for sure. More teams in a Canada the better as far as I'm concerned .

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 8:20 pm 
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Centre Videotron is sweeeeeeet. Look at the rake on those seats! I don't think it passes U.S. building codes.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 9:21 pm 
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Hawks might wanna consider winning this one, I dunno.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 9:45 pm 
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Really struggling to put away a weak-ass team.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 9:48 pm 
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 9:52 pm 
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I like when the Hawks have at least six points in every previous five games. Right now they have five in their last five. A regulation loss here drops that to three in five.

┳┻|
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┻┳|
┳┻| _
┻┳| •.•) that's bad
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 9:59 pm 
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Well, you can't be surprised. The annual midseason freefall is under way.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 9:59 pm 
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Don't they purposely get shitfaced on this roadtrip every year as some sort of badge of honor/team building thing? They always get smoked by this bunch of hacks.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 10:02 pm 
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Urlacher's missing neck wrote:
Don't they purposely get shitfaced on this roadtrip every year as some sort of badge of honor/team building thing? They always get smoked by this bunch of hacks.

Yeah, last year in Raleigh they lost 5-0.

After the near-automatic loss coming up in St. Louis the Hawks have what looks like a soft four-game homestand against Buffalo, Carolina, Nashville, and Detroit, but with the way this team has been playing they could do a whole lot of losing in those games anyway. Hawks in January, there's no telling where the bottom is.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 10:12 pm 
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whalers? did someone say hartford whalers? i think this is literally the most apropos time on the board that i could link this little diddy i made back in the day when, uhhh, some tapes hit and a friend of mine invented the "melstep" genre.

incidentally, i once applied to that joke/gag store [inauspiciously?] named "Uncle Fun" with just that little 1min30sec song/diddy as my veritable resume/application. somewhere in a lost "sinicalyptical manifesto" i'd claim that someday i deserve to make $$$ off of music/media/etc cuz i had the brilliant idea occur to me to combine brass bonanza with [the tapes] cuz when i first heard [the tapes] i heard brass bonanza and yeah.... fuckin aye, somebody likes this, right? it's not just me?

</lookatme> aka </nobodycaresaboutthehawkstiltheplayoffsanyways> aka </HEYATLEASTIMNOTMCCLURE> AKA </CUCK!!!!> =P

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 30, 2016 10:36 pm 
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Blues got spanked by the Perds, so...

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2016 12:31 am 
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btw real talk, how is saad doing with the columbus blue jackets? i heard they have some giant winning streak, but when you see generic highlight reels of it you barely see saad.... is he fitting in nicely with that burgeoning squad?

i remember when the hawks were in between cups #1 and #2 (if not #2 and #3) i watched a first round playoff game and was ike "wow, the hawks won because they were the team with brandon saad" --- that's why it was like "wtf?" that he was let go... in 20/20 hindsight was moving saad a good haul for the hawks? sry but i'm a hockey ignoramus so i have to ask you guys to fill me in cuz i know y'all know

sincerely,

# THE MGMT

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2016 12:35 am 
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Curious Hair wrote:
Image


btw, this picture is the coital equivalent of those threads on here where 2-3ppl make "thread title puns" threads like, example, someone has a "Rogue One: A Star Wars Story" thread so someone makes "BROGUE ONE: A CFMB STORY" and yeah, once you enter one of those punny threads you basically the textual/discourse equivalent of this picture =P

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2016 7:13 am 
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sinicalypse wrote:
Curious Hair wrote:
Image


btw, this picture is the coital equivalent of those threads on here where 2-3ppl make "thread title puns" threads like, example, someone has a "Rogue One: A Star Wars Story" thread so someone makes "BROGUE ONE: A CFMB STORY" and yeah, once you enter one of those punny threads you basically the textual/discourse equivalent of this picture =P


Well it's a good thing I didn't start a thread called, "Plastic Bean Bag"...

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2016 11:50 am 
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Curious Hair wrote:
Well, you can't be surprised. The annual midseason freefall is under way.



I know you love the ledge, but I wouldn't go stand on it just yet. Last night was about as trappy a trap game as you can get. Big dramatic win the night before vs rival on one end and a trip to St. Louis for winter classic on the other end, it's actually impressive that the Hawks played as well as they did for half of that game.

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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2016 11:59 am 
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I know it's heresy to slam him but Kane is on a pace for something like 22 goals this year.

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