Three-time World Champion. Executive of the Year. Breaker of curses.

Now, Theo Epstein has another title to add to his impressive resumé.

World’s greatest leader.

That’s not just some cheap title given to him by a butt-kissing employee who bought a corny coffee mug, either. The Cubs president and general manager earned that distinction from Fortune magazine, who recently published a list of the world’s 50 greatest leaders.

Epstein, fresh off assembling the Cubs’ first World Series roster in over 100 years, was at the very top, surpassing many notable names — including Senator John McCain, Melinda Gates, LeBron James, Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, and, yes, even Pope Francis.

That’s right, people … Theo Epstein > The Pope.

It’s quite the honor for the 43-year-old baseball wizard. But, for what it’s worth, he doesn’t believe he deserves it.

“Um, I can’t even get my dog to stop peeing in the house, ” he said, via ESPN. “That is ridiculous. The whole thing is patently ridiculous. It’s baseball — a pastime involving a lot of chance. If Zobrist’s ball is three inches farther off the line, I’m on the hot seat for a failed five-year plan. And I’m not even the best leader in our organization; our players are.”

Next up? World domination … just as soon as he can get that dog to stop peeing in the house.

I thought it was Jason Heyward?

That is ridiculous. The whole thing is patently ridiculous.

It's more fun to be a victim

There will never be an effective vaccine. I'll never get one anyway.

What the hell, I would. Post op is OK right? Right?!?!?!

Laurence Holmes is a fucking weirdo, a nerd in denial, and a wannabe. Not a very good radio host either.

I stopped reading after I saw Chance the shitty rapper.

Where is Kenny on the list?

I smell a bit....

Jim Jones is the world's greatest leader of all-time. Talk about getting people to follow you to the ends of the earth.

Eh, to be fair, when it was showtime there were apparently scads of people that wanted to 23-skidoo, or at least get their kids out of there, to the point that some toughs (I don't know what you'd call them ... burly loyal followers?) had to more or less corral and force the party to start for MANY in attendance.

Have a terrible night and die in MANY fires.

Eh, to be fair, when it was showtime there were apparently scads of people that wanted to 23-skidoo, or at least get their kids out of there, to the point that some toughs (I don't know what you'd call them ... burly loyal followers?) had to more or less corral and force the party to start for MANY in attendance.

If you hate Laurence, then don't listen - don't comment. When he co-hosts the B&B show, take that day off ... listen to an old podcast of a Bernstein solo show and jerk off all day.