So I have a neighbor who is pretty much a loser. He does not care for his dog and lets him roam around the hood. But the dog keeps pooping on my small yard I have that I use for gardening and growing veggies.

I confronted that fucker many times but he is a loser and says fuck you to me. Others have complained too but he doesn't care. He's been in the complex the longest so I guess he thinks he has more rights than anyone else. The complex management are scared of the guy and don't do much.

I have shoo'd the dog away a few times but it keeps coming back to my area to do it's stuff. At this point I'm ready to kill the dog. I know the dog does not deserve it, but I feel like it's the only option.

Of course I probably won't. But what should I do? I can't put up a fence.

Any secrets, dirty deeds, or special tricks out there to get this fucking mutt off my yard and garden? I've used dog repellent spray and it didnt work and it hurts my garden. Ive had thoughts of murdering the beast and burying it somewhere but I'm too much of a pussy to do that.

Take a dump on your neighbors lawn.

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Call the cops

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When I am stuck and need to figure something out I always remember the Immortal words of Socrates when he said:"I just drank what?"

I thought of that but I think it's illegal. Anyway there are camera's all around I would be easily caught and kicked out of the complex.

I have shoveled the shit back on his yard but he doesn't care.

Think of the biggest scumbag on Dog the Bounty Hunter (other than Dog or Beth). That's this guy.

First of all, you're a goddamn monster.

Clean the shit up while thinking of ways to murder your neighbor and get away with it, and leave the dog alone.

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Fare you well, fare you well
I love you more than words can tell
Listen to the river sing sweet songs
To rock my soul

they won't do much.

Get motion sensing sprinklers that will blast the dog with water if he wanders on your property.

Baring that, move.

Ive read about those but not sure if I know how to hook those up. Sound expensive too.

Knowing how Hawaii You is typically late to the party, this dog thing probably happened 30 years ago and Hawaii You is just recounting it here because he thinks it's still a thing today.

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Successful calls:

Kyrie Irving will never win anything as a team's alpha: check
T.rubisky is a bust: check
Ben Simmons is a liability: check
The Fields Cult is dumb: double check

2013 CSFMB ROY

No it's real. And it's getting on my nerves. Maybe there is a 'CIA' type of solution someone can PM me?

I never disputed that it *was* real.

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Successful calls:

Kyrie Irving will never win anything as a team's alpha: check
T.rubisky is a bust: check
Ben Simmons is a liability: check
The Fields Cult is dumb: double check

2013 CSFMB ROY

Kill the fucker

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You never miss your wealth, till your well went dry
Seem like only yesterday, you were here smiling
Now you gone away, but I know you in a better place
No traces of you, what can I do?
Alone and confused

rather than just putting the poop on his lawn, where he doesn't care, just smear it on his stoop when he isn't home.

Just keep the dog out of this, he's an innocent in this dispute and knows not what he is doing.

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“When I walked in this morning, and saw the flag was at half mast, I thought 'alright another bureaucrat ate it.'" - Ron Swanson

Push dog treats halfway into the poop. Next time the dog comes over, he can clean up after himself.

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"All crowds boycotting football games shouldn't care who sings or takes a knee because they aren't watching." - Nas

WRONG!! This is they type of logic you do not need in your life. This fucker knows damn well what he is doing and there is only one way to keep this from happening again.....KILL HIM!!

If you let this slide you are going to find other dogs doing the same shit to you.

_________________
You never miss your wealth, till your well went dry
Seem like only yesterday, you were here smiling
Now you gone away, but I know you in a better place
No traces of you, what can I do?
Alone and confused

I just want to make sure I’m clear here...

Your first thought was to shit on his lawn, and the only thing stopping you is cameras?

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Make the crack whore clean it up.

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Guy shits on lawns and wants to kill dogs and wonders why he cant get laid.

_________________
Fare you well, fare you well
I love you more than words can tell
Listen to the river sing sweet songs
To rock my soul

I really don't want to deal w/ smearing poop. If you see the guy you'll see why I wouldn't want to mess w/ him. I'm sure he's an ex-con and did the raping of many men in jail.

I read about dogs eating their own shit on the net. Someone suggested pouring bacon grease on the poop and the dog next time in the area will eat it. But it can kill the dog or make it very sick. I wouldn't mind doing that but again, camera's all over the place.


I have to admit I've been sort of been obsessed with this situation the past few nights. I've been trying to think of diabolic ways of killing that dog. And to my surprise I've enjoyed having these thoughts in my head. I know in reality I probably won't hurt it. But the thoughts are there and frankly inspiring.

Bowl of delicious antifreeze.

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Elections have consequences.

Interesting. Tell me more. And how would I lure the mutt into the trap?

No idea but it supposedly causes quick death and the sweet taste is attractive to dogs.

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Elections have consequences.

Forget it . don't tell me. I dont think I could carry this out. No way I could get away w/ anything like that. I'd be caught on camera. And if the mutt did die I'd probably feel like shit. And what if some other dog drank it accidentally.

I'm sure they have dog forensic units now in the Police Dept's. Like a CSI Lassie Unit. I'd probably get busted easy. They'd do an autopsy on the dog and find one of my hair follicles inside its digestive track or something. Plus starting this whole thread just implicated me in a mass canine murder conspiracy. They would trace it back to here and suponea everyone who's replied to this thread and I'd take the fall. Nobody would fall on the sword for me except maybe Cubs 77.

Shit. Can't do it. Has to be an accident from God I guess.

DUDE! Poisoning dogs is not cool.

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ya talking about it is one thing. Doing it and living with it is another. Forget it. I will just go back to square one and start taking shits on that guys yard at night or something. I don't know. I don't want to be a dog murderer.

This has been therapeutic. I should just try going to animal control again. I know they won't do anything. But I'll feel like I did something.

Nice recovery, Mike. "Yeah, for the dog...."

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I don't remember half the time if I'm hiding or I'm lost

Even talking about poisoning a domestic animal is out there, man.

I'd suggest putting up some kind of soft barrier between your property and your neighbor's, like some privacy trees or bushes or something. Dogs don't typically won't want to work that hard to not take a shit in their own "den".

If that's not feasible, Home Depot should have some easily-installed short fencing meant to go around gardens. Simply buy enough of these to border your shared property line, and push them into the ground. Not sure about how tall they get, though.

the short fencing sounds like something i can do. i will look into it.

move