So, you've decided to shitpost. Great! This fantastic decision will certainly get you noticed. Remember, even negative attention is attention, so go for it! Let's get you ready for your first shitpost.

Remember, you're not a bad guy in real life. You buy drinks. This is only your online personality. So say anything you want! Some other shitposter will surely defend you, especially if you got drunk together once.

So what shall we shitpost about? Doesn't really matter actually, it just needs to make someone mad. So why not call out Someone's disabled kid? Or ask people to commit suicide. Maybe something hilarious like calling out a racial group, or even better accuse others of racism. Brag about how incredibly rich you are in your rented apartment. Doing that will surely get those reply buttons clicked. And hell, you're a good guy in real life. This is all just an act, no different from Tom Hanks. He wasn't really turned into a 12 year old in Big, and you really didnt turn into one either when you suggested that the Germans were pretty close to winning the war.

So you've made your shitpost. Wait back and revel in the glorious retorts from fellow shitposters and people wanting you to die in a fire. Congratulations! You're now a complete person!

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

Meta-shitposting. Truly next-level stuff.

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+1

Just missing some (((/)))

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Power is always in the hands of the masses of men. What oppresses the masses is their own ignorance, their own short-sighted selfishness.
- Henry George

Shit-Posters will be fine.

Thought this was going after me until I read the second part. Thank God for Pultes!

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Hawaii (fuck) You

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Hawaii (fuck) You

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Sandy is one of the good ones

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

Thank you for not including the Gif brigade in your analysis.

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How can I become a shit-poster?

I don't know if I can impart on you the breath of inspiration that grants rent-free residence in the mind (and signature line) of every lib...but we'd gladly take you under our wing.

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My son, you're well on your way. We here at Quality Shitpost Institute admire your dedication to being a penis on an online forum and your desire to improve your shitposting. We have assembled a few tips to help you along.
Try picking a fight with a less well regarded board member to ally the weak minded into a herd mentality. These less intelligent posters will make for swell allies when you put up a fine piece of shitposting.
When you have your allies and you're ready to shitpost, try topics such as "obama wants your papers". Code words such as TRUMPETS helps, and using phrases such as "look in a mirror" (formerly known as "no u") work well. Do things to be a jerk and then accuse others of doing the same exact thing. We call this "admit nothing, deny everything, make counter accusations".
Other great codes to use in your shitpost would be things like "short bus", "apologist" or "my name is baby mcnown".
Remember to always reply to the poster and not the posts.
Thanks for your dedication to your craft and may your posts always be shitty.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

I don't like playing "soft schedules".

Become?

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Padawan, you're learning without knowing you're learning.
However if picking on chas or Hawaii is distasteful to you but your still like to shitpost, never forget to rail on a poster for a simple typo or obscure grammatical error.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

I've never seen someone so jealous that he isn't the face of a message board any longer.

But he did nail a thing. I do love the recognition that I am one of the faces of the message board. My mama is so proud.

I have no idea if I'm a good person or not, but gosh darnit people enjoy my company.

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Rick Hahn is the best GM in baseball.

Corrected. And to answer that more relevant question, recall that CFMB posting perfectly reflect your real world personality. You are the same guy in real life as on the Internet. Imagine how many real world personalities the mult crowd must have?

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Hawaii (fuck) You

Ladies and gentlemen, I didnt see this on the itinerary, but apparently we have a star guest speaker today. Ladies and gentlemen, please give a very warm welcome to one of the kings of shitposting, IMU! Although he needs and deserves no introduction, recall his views on Palastine and his unforgettable posts regarding the use of nuclear weapons on Japan. Since then hes evolved into bragging about his income and the town he lives in as proof of his self worth.
IMU, the above was some great shitposting and we are proud to have you here to really show us how it's done

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

Shots fired at Nas!

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Be well

GO BEARS!!!

IMU vs. Darkside....longest running board feud at this point?

I believe so.

Good Dolphin vs The Quote Function

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Burrito is my favorite shitposter

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fRANK vs INTELLIGENT??

lol