Yes. I will. With a chair.

Unrelated: I'm so glad the Troy AIkman Wing Stop commercials are back!


Hi.

I am Troy Aikman!

If you want wings.




Go to Wing Stop.

You'll see.


They'll be the best you've had!

If you like wings.







You'll love the wings at Wing Stop.

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"succulent steaks"

What a shitty alliteration, and a lazy description... It sounds like a steak I would get at an Old Country Buffet.

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team Mully & Hanley
team Meatpants

There is a Cheerios commercial with some guy is reading the advantages of eating Cheerios. I swear he looks just like Bill Veeck,former White Sox owner. I don't know how a guy with that "look" gets a job selling anything.

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favrefan said:"Chris Coghlan isn't gonna pay your rent, Jimmy."

Every political ad this election season even the ones for candidates I support.

Only the beginning...

He sounds like he's reading an eye chart. I've heard better acting in Bang Bus pornos.

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"Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public." ~ H.L. Mencken

Just heard a John Cicco commercial saying that their commercials have been voted the most annoying commercials on radio and they played a VM from an AM1000 listener saying as much. They want feedback about whether or not people like their commercials, and you can call them at 219-769-1744 to let them know.

Kudos to them for doing this.

The chick in the Chevy Volt commercial says she's never been more in love with a car in "any way, shape, and form." Ugh. Who let that go out?

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-- source

I love the Indian girl from the TV commercial. Her name is "Priya." Beautiful.

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Kid Cairo's Boers & Bernstein YouTube Channel

Kid Cairo: 2013 March Madness Tournament Winner!

"Cowabunga? Cowa fucking piece of dog shit! This game is diarrhea coming out of my dick!"

Is she the one that's TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTALLLY in love with it?

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My Maserati does 186.

That's the one. As if the "Toooooooooooooooootalllllllyyyyyy" wasn't enough, she then goes on with what I posted.

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-- source

My brain immediately shuts down with an overloaded internal reciting of TOOOOOOOTALLLLY over and over in my mind for the next 10 minutes so I never hear what happens next.

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My Maserati does 186.

I keep hearing the 5 hour energy pink lemonade singing lady and envision her doing wonderful work with the Polecats ads.

Why does the doctor talking about limpdickitis sound like he has a limpdick firmly planted in his mouth?

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-- source

Subliminal song of the day? Laurence Holmes used to do that on the nighttime SCORE...

It's been too long since I've bitched about a commercial. And I'm sure you all miss my bitchings dearly.


I have a couple. First up, that "let your rebate liberate" song. What the fuck? I get that they were trying to make a catchy song, but how about making one with lyrics that make sense? Also, it says "save some energy, save some dough." Dough? I fucking hate when people call money "dough." But then, that's good for me, because no one ever fucking calls money "dough." Who fucking wrote that song, a 30's-era bank robber? I'm surprised they didn't go with "clams." (by crackey!)

Next up, a two-fer: these two fucking ads that Discover is running are utterly insufferable. I'll start by pointing out, for the thousandth time, that a person calling a customer service rep is a shitty basis for a commercial; it's almost unthinkable that a good commercial could result from this theme. But Discover goes far, far beyond a shitty theme in its quest to annoy. The dialogue is totally lame, the actors are egregious in their delivery; it's basically the perfect annoying machine. Fucking discover. Fuck you, Discover. Seriously. Fuck your fucking mailers you send me all the fucking time. Fuck your stupid ass credit card that you have to pay to own, and fuck your fucking ads. I don't know how you've managed to avoid going out of business hitherto, but hopefully you do soon, you fucking Radio Shack of credit cards.

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You can't see me because of internet.

The landowner effectively owns part shares in millions of part-time slaves called, "taxpayers." -Roy L
A Personal Relationship with Jesus?

Fuck you to whatever company has forced me to hate Stevie Wonder's "Superstitious."

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-- source

What do you mean? I have a discover... haven't paid a penny to have one. In fact, they pay me about $300 a year to use their card.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

the american airlines commercials are so cloying it makes me want to vomit. it's a nice offer by the company, meanwhile from what i hear, AA sucks the root. but the commercials are ridiculously sappy.

There's a commercial for Andro400 in which "Don" from Greenville, S.C. talks about the benefits of the product. However, he sounds suspiciously like the guy (can't remember his name) from Las Vegas in the commercial for a different product (Ageless Male?) who raved about that.

A quick Google search turned up complaints from people who bought the product and despite not ordering any more were sent more each month and had their credit card charged. Shocking. They then found it difficult to contact customer service and had to go to their credit card company to have the charges reversed. EVEN. MORE. SHOCKING.!

Don't want to cause a bunch of juicers to go into roid rage.

If Bob from Account Temps is so fucking great, why doesn't Mr. Fernwell hire the fucker permanently!?!

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"Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public." ~ H.L. Mencken

what about that ad on the score, I dunno what it is exactly, but "DO YOU SUFFER FROM BACK PAIN, KNEE PAIN, SCROTUM PAIN, AU BON PAIN??" IF SO YOU NEED blah blah....

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Reality is your friend, not your enemy. -- Seacrest

Once a year I have to reiterate my hatred toward any business that squeezes their agenda into an existing Christmas song. Tis The Season is usually the culprit. I hate Christmas songs, so anyone that incorporates their jingle into a Christmas song will NEVER get my business. Sons of bitches!!!

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"Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public." ~ H.L. Mencken

The one for Garmin immediately comes to mind.

Like this? She should perish in a car fire.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gi4IfW4dEA8

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-- source

Longtime Score listeners probably remember spots for "fathers' rights attorney" Jeffrey Leving. He's running on the Loop/i101 now. The only problem? Whoever recorded the new spot, one of those fake dialogues where it's pretty clear that the two people were never in the same place and never even met, referred to Jeffrey Leving as "Jeffrey Levy." Rhymes with heavy.

Now maybe I don't know much about the crazy world of copywriting, but one thing I always made sure to do when writing spots for clients was

GET
THEIR
FUCKING
NAME
RIGHT

EDIT: it appears he spells his given name "Jeffery," which lends a delightful note of irony to my post.

EDIT 2: the Loop still plays a shit ton of Rush, huh. I'm glad nothing has changed in ten years.

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WOW! I'm sure Mr. Leving won't buy additional commercial time on those 2 stations if they continue to butcher his name.

Then again, I keep hearing the SCORE guys butcher the name of SportClips as "SportsClips" & Dan McNeil says after Bears' HC Lovie Smith addresses the media that the "Coach's Press Conference is sponsored by Harris Bank." Uh, Mac, that's not what they're called now. They're called now BMO Harris Bank.

Am I bad person if the nasally little girl in the White Castle ad angers me?

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-- source

This Donald's McDonald's commercial didn't bother me at first but now it is really annoying
and Driver is like the 3rd receiver now so he isn't that good a get. He does a ton of spots up
here over the border.

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Flew too close to the sun on wings of pastrami