In my state, I feel it would be entertaining to hold a contest to find the top quotable movie of all time according to the CSFMB. The rules are as follows:
1) Each movie must be nominated by someone with at least three supporting quotable lines. The movie must be seconded by someone else within the thread to be considered. If the nominating and supporting post do not contain at least three quotable quotes, the movie will not be considered. All candidates must be nominated and seconded by Friday 6/25 @ 11:59 pm central.
2) All movies which have qualified will run in a poll from Saturday 6/26 (when I wake up and post it) to Sunday 7/3 midnight. Each registered user ID will be able to vote for up to three movies. The top winner will win the title of CSFMB Most Quotable Movie Of All Time. The runners up will receive Jack Straws.
3) I declare the following five movies automatic qualifiers in the final: Airplane, Anchorman, Animal House, Blues Brothers, and Caddyshack. The final list will be limited to these five plus up to twenty additional qualifiers eliminated in order of quotable lines. Should there be ties, the movies with the most quotable lines will have preference.
4) I will keep the following list updated during this nomination phase and listed in alphabetical order with all quotations along with the last updated date/time.
5) Even after your movie has been seconded, feel free to supply additional quotations that you think are worthwhile. I will list them all with the movie unless they are obviously intended as a distraction. Do not include the names of any characters in your quotation; if it is quotable enough; no character name is needed.
6) Don't forget the point of this is to be able to quote the line. If it requires three or four introductory lines to get to your point, it is probably not quotable in terms of this contest.

Last Updated: 6/21/2010 1:26pm
Airplane

Bad news, the fog's getting thicker. -- And Leon is getting laarrrrrggggger!

Joey, have you ever been in a Turkish Prison?

Well, we had a choice of steak or fish. -- Yes, yes, I remember, I had lasagna.

Anchorman

It's so damn hot!!! Milk was a bad choice!!

Do you really love the lamp or are you just saying it because you saw it? -- I love lamp. I love lamp!

I'm sorry Champ, I think I ate your chocolate squirrel.

Animal House

The time has come for someone to put his foot down. And that foot is me.

Will you tell those assholes to shut up? -- Hey! Shut up you assholes!

Ah, she broke our date. -- Washing her hair? -- Dead mother.

Blues Brothers

It's 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses. -- Hit it.

What kind of music do you usually have here? -- Oh, we got both kinds. We got country and western.

Are you the police? -- No, ma'am. We're musicians.

Caddyshack

Don't sell yourself short Judge, you're a tremendous slouch.

Oh, this your wife, huh? A lovely lady. Hey baby, you must've been something before electricity.

I want you to kill every gophers on the golf course! -- Correct me if I'm wrong Sandy, but if I kill all the golfers, they're gonna lock me up and throw away the key.

Glen Garry Glenross

We're adding a little something to this month's sales contest. As you all know, first prize is a Cadillac Eldorado. Anybody want to see second prize? Second prize is a set of steak knives. Third prize is you're fired.

What's your name? --Fuck you. That's my name. You know why, mister? 'Cause you drove a Hyundai to get here tonight, I drove an eighty thousand dollar BMW. *That's* my name.

These are the new leads. These are the Glengarry leads, and to you they're gold, and you don't get them. They're for closers.

Goodfellas

Sure, mom, I settle down with a nice girl every night, then I'm free the next morning.

No, no, I don't know, you said it. How do I know? You said I'm funny. How the fuck am I funny, what the fuck is so funny about me? Tell me, tell me what's funny!

Now go home and get your fuckin' shinebox.

Happy Gilmore

You're gonna die, clown!

The price is *wrong*, bitch!

Just tap it in. Just tap it in. Give it a little tappy tap tap tap-a-roo.

Office Space

I'll be honest with you, I love his music. I do. I'm a Michael Bolton fan. For my money, I don't know if it gets any better than when he sings "When a Man Loves a Woman".

I'm thinking I might take that new chick from Logistics. If things go well I might be showing her my O-face. "Oh... Oh... Oh!" You know what I'm talkin' about. "Oh!"

It was a "Jump to Conclusions" mat. You see, it would be this mat that you would put on the floor... and would have different *conclusions* written on it that you could *jump to*! --That's the worst idea I've ever heard in my life, Tom. -- Yes, this is horrible, this idea.

Step Brothers

I have a belly full of white dog crap in me, and now you lay this shit on me?

Suppose Nancy sees me coming out of the shower and decides to come on to me. I'm looking good, got a luscious V of hair going through my chest pubes down to my ball fro. She takes one look at me and goes "Oh my god, I've had the old bull now I want the young calf" and she grabs me by the weiner.

Well the only reason you're living here, is because me and my dad decided that your mom was really hot, and maybe we should just both bang her, and we'll put up with the retard in the meantime.

Super Troopers

The snozzberries taste like snozzberries.

Do I look like a cat to you boy? Am I jumpin' around all nimbly bimbly from tree to tree? Am I drinking milk from a saucer? *Do you see me eating mice!?*

Oh, look, a bar of soap. -- Oohoohoh shit. I got you good, you fucker!

Team America: World Police

Jesus, this is a nice limo. -- Yes, it is. Now suck my cock.

Your plan will fail! You'll never keep the world leaders distracted here for 9 hours! -- Oh no? I've got Arec Barrwin! -- Dear God!

Great job, team. Head back to base for debriefing and cocktails.

Tombstone

I want your blood. And I want your souls. And I want them both right now!

You gonna do somethin'? Or are you just gonna stand there and bleed?

You tell 'em *I'm* coming... and hell's coming with me, you hear?... Hell's coming with me!

Tommy Boy

Brothers don't shake hands........Brothers GOTTA HUG!!!

My whole life sucks! I don't know what I'm doing, I don't know where I'm going. My dad just died, we just killed Bambi, I'm out here getting my ass kicked and every time I drive down the road I wanna jerk the wheel into a Goddamn bridge abutment!

Hey, if you want me to take a dump in a box and mark it guaranteed, I will. I got spare time.

Nominated, but awaiting a second:
Army of Darkness
Breakfast Club
Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo
Coming to America
Dazed and Confused
Diehard
Fargo
Fast Times at Ridgemont High
Gymkata
Igby Goes Down
Krush Groove
Observe and Report
Rivers Edge
Sixteen Candles
The Pope of Greenwich Village
There Will Be Blood

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"All crowds boycotting football games shouldn't care who sings or takes a knee because they aren't watching." - Nas

Tommy Boy:

1) "Brothers don't shake hands........Brothers GOTTA HUG!!!"

2) "I just wanna drive my car into a GO"DAM Bridge Embankment."

3) "If you want me to take a dump in a box, I've got spare time."

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Happy Gilmore

"you're gonna die clown"
"The price is wrong bitch"
"Just tap it in happy, just tap it in..."

_________________
team Mully & Hanley
team Meatpants

Step Brothers

Dale: Did you touch my drumset?
Brennan: Nope.
Dale: Why are you so sweaty?
Brennan: I was watching cops.

Dale: OK, name your favorite dinosaur?
Brennan and Dale: Philosoraptor.
Brennan: Alright. If you were a chick, whose the one guy you would sleep with? Brennan and Dale: John Stamos.
Dale: WHAT?!?
Brennan: Did we just become best friends?
Dale: YEP!

You yelled "rape" at the top of your lungs.
Brennan Huff: Mom, I honestly thought I was gonna be raped for a second. He had the craziest look in his eyes. And at one point he said, "Lets get it on."

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Die Hard

"now I have a machine-gun. Ho. Ho. Ho."

"Is the building on fire?"
"No, but its gonna need a new paint job and a shitload of screen doors"

"Oh my god! The quarterback IS toast"

"Sir this channel is reserved for emergency calls"
"no shit lady, does it sound like I'm ordering a pizza?

"were gonna need some more FBI guys"

_________________
team Mully & Hanley
team Meatpants

Some more Anchorman, for added support:

"It smells like Bigfoot's dick!"
"Mmm. San Diego. Drink it in, it always goes down smooth. Discovered by the Germans in 1904, they named it San Diego, which of course in German means 'a whale's vagina'."
"Um, I'm very important. I have many leather-bound books, and my apartment smells of rich mahogany."
"You've got to keep your head on a swivel when you find yourself in the middle of a vicious cockfight."
"The Bears can smell the menstruation!"
"Mr. Burgundy, you have a massive erection."

Mr. Reason sucks

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Just as an aside, "Anchorman" is easily one of the most over-rated movies of the last 10 years. Not even worth a second giggle.



Let's get some John Hughes going in this MF'er:

BREAKFAST CLUB: (these aren't even the best lines!)
*You know what this is? This is what happens when you spill a can of paint in the garage.
*You mess with the bull, you get the horns.
*Why do you have all of that stuff in your purse? You never know when you have to jam.
*Hey, Son! What about your homework? That's ok Dad, I'l just finish it - on the boat!
*I WANT TO BE AN AIRBORNE RANGER!
*Not even close........BUD!

SIXTEEN CANDLES:
*Donger, where is my.....automobile? "Automobile?" Lake, big lake! Bmmmph, splash!
*Married? Married. Married? Yeah, married, sheesh.
*Are you sitting down? My brother paid a dollar to see you underwear.
*JAKE!!!!!!!

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Breakin' 2:Electric Boogaloo

Turbo: Man, I am hungry, gimme some food!

Ozone: Girls are whack, man!


Krush Groove

Rick: Forget it, man. C'mon ... I think this guy's gay.

Rick: That guy was a sucker, man. Carmen, file this.

[He hands her the "accounting book" -- a trashed out spiral notebook.]

Carmen: [rolls eyes and files the book by tossing it aside on a nearby table.]

Rick: Damn. Take all my money out of that bank.

Carmen: We don't have an account.

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I'll second Tommy Boy and Happy Gilmore.

Dazed and Confused:

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The Pope of Greenwich Village:

Paulie: The cop shit his pants! Hey, hey, the cop shit his pants!

Charlie: Honest work. Let me tell ya somethin' about 'honest work'. When somebody says they got 'honest work', you know what they got? They got a shit job, that's what they got.

Paulie: Aw man, another two-hundred dollar a week hard-on lookin' to shit on anyone was drivin' a Coupe deVille.

Paulie: Nicky don't go for spit. 'Nose' still shines his own shoes, pop. I don't call that success.
Paulie's Father: Oh yeah? And what do you call it?
Paulie: Knowin' how to spend it. I never ordered a Brandy in my life that wasn't Cordon Bleu... I took two-hundred from shylocks, pop, to see Sinatra at the Garden? Sat two seats away from Tony Bennett. That's success!

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The Court will accord substantial deference to the government's immigration policies, particularly those that implicate matters of national security.

Fast Times at Ridgemont High

All I need are some tasty waves, a cool buds, and I'm fine.

That was my skull! I'm so wasted!

Those guys are fags.

Hey, Bud, let's party!

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Full Metal Jack - Numb Nuts!

More Die Hard:

"Who's driving this car? Stevie Wonder?"

"Welcome to the party pall"

"Yippee ki-yay mother fucker"

"All the terrorist in the world and I have to kill one with feet smaller than my sister"

"Now I know what a TV dinner feels like"

"Glass? Who gives a shit about glass?"

Man this movie has to win...

_________________
team Mully & Hanley
team Meatpants

I move for a default judgment to declare Dazed and Confused the immediate winner.

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The Court will accord substantial deference to the government's immigration policies, particularly those that implicate matters of national security.

Drop Out, I don't recall that quote in any movie I have ever seen...

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We all have private ails. The troublemakers are they who need public cures for their private ails.- Eric Hoffer

This is easy!

"Monty Python & the Holy Grail"

"The Princess Bride"

"The Goonies"

"Star Wars"

"Glengarry GlenRoss"

"Big Trouble in Little China"

"Goodfellas"

and a few others that I personally think qualify (and I'll include the lines; the above need no support. If you can't find 3 quotable quotes in those movies you should stop watching movies FOREVER):

"There Will Be Blood"

I drink your milkshake! I drink it up!

You're just a bastard from a basket.

I have a competition in me. I want no one else to succeed. I hate most people.

I am a false prophet. God is a superstition.

"Observe and Report"

Fuck you, Ronnie.
Fuck you, Sadam Hussein of Iraq.

You guys are my infantry. One of you dies, God gave me another one.

Why the fuck would I want to blow up the Chick-fil-A? It's fucking delicious!

I have a dream most nights. It starts on a playground. There's kids swinging, laughing, dogs barking, butterflies just flapping their little wings. And then you hear a rumbling, and over the horizon comes a black cloud and it's made of cancer and pus. And it starts sweeping over the playground and everyone starts screaming and clawing their eyes and pulling at their hair, and saying "Help! What do we do?" And you know what happens next? Out steps me wielding the biggest fucking shotgun you've ever seen in your whole life. And you know what I do? I blow every fucking thing away. And I am getting God's work done. When it's all over and the dust has settled, the whole world gathers below me and they say, "Thank you, Ronnie, thank you for helping, being a great man and doing this for us." And you know what I say? "You don't need to thank me. I'm just a guy with a gun. I'm just a cop."

"Igby Goes Down"

I'm drowning in assholes.

Good things come to obsessive-compulsives who fixate.

I think if Gandhi had to spend a prolonged amount of time with you, he'd end up beating the shit out of you, too.

If heaven is such a wonderful place then how come being crucified is such a big fucking sacrifice?

THE WORLD ISN'T READY FOR PEEKA! I told her, Lorna Luft is just too fucking obscure. People just think you're doing a bad Liza.

It's just...you and me, old man.

"Army of Darkness"

Shop Smart. Shop S-Mart.

This...IS MY BOOMSTICK!

Give me some sugar, baby.

I second W_Z's nominations for GOODFELLAS & GLENGARY GLENROSS.

Here are some quotes:
Tommy DeVito: Good shot. What do you want from me? Good shot. Fuckin' rat anyway. His family's all rats. He'll grow up to be a rat

Tommy DeVito: Sure, mom, I settle down with a nice girl every night, then I'm free the next morning.

Tommy DeVito: No, no, I don't know, you said it. How do I know? You said I'm funny. How the fuck am I funny, what the fuck is so funny about me? Tell me, tell me what's funny!

Henry Hill: [narrating] And then there was Jimmy Two Times, who got that nickname because he said everything twice, like:
Jimmy Two Times: I'm gonna go get the papers, get the papers.

Billy Batts: [takes a drink] Now go home and get your fuckin' shinebox.
===================================================
Blake: We're adding a little something to this month's sales contest. As you all know, first prize is a Cadillac Eldorado. Anybody want to see second prize?
[Holds up prize]
Blake: Second prize is a set of steak knives. Third prize is you're fired.

Blake: You see this watch? You see this watch?
Dave Moss: Yeah.
Blake: That watch costs more than you car. I made $970,000 last year. How much you make? You see pal, that's who I am, and you're nothing. Nice guy? I don't give a shit. Good father? Fuck you! Go home and play with your kids. You wanna work here - close! You think this is abuse? You think this is abuse, you cocksucker? You can't take this, how can you take the abuse you get on a sit? You don't like it, leave

Dave Moss: What's your name?
Blake: Fuck you. That's my name.
[Moss laughs]
Blake: You know why, mister? 'Cause you drove a Hyundai to get here tonight, I drove an eighty thousand dollar BMW. *That's* my name.

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favrefan said:"Chris Coghlan isn't gonna pay your rent, Jimmy."

i could quote both those movies all day, jimmy!

Jimmy was the kind of guy that rooted for bad guys in the movies.

And that's the hardest part. Today everything is different; there's no action... have to wait around like everyone else. Can't even get decent food - right after I got here, I ordered some spaghetti with marinara sauce, and I got egg noodles and ketchup. I'm an average nobody... get to live the rest of my life like a schnook.

Now we can eat.

Now the guy's got Paulie as a partner. Any problems, he goes to Paulie. Trouble with the bill? He can go to Paulie. Trouble with the cops, deliveries, Tommy, he can call Paulie. But now the guy's gotta come up with Paulie's money every week, no matter what. Business bad? Fuck you, pay me. Oh, you had a fire? Fuck you, pay me. Place got hit by lightning, huh? Fuck you, pay me.

those are of course all from "goodfellas".

GGGR:

You never open your mouth until you know what the shot is.

Coffee is for closers only.

These are the new leads. These are the Glengarry leads, and to you they're golden. And you can't have them. They're for closers...

"Maury's wigs are tested against Hurricane Winds!"


"You got money for these fuckn commercials, you dont got my money!!??
TO-DAY, TO-DAY, TO-DAY"

"I just wanna make sure I dont end up kissing Nat Fuckin King Cole over here"



GGGR

"Nobody wants to here your fuckn war stories"
"Shut the Fuck Up Dave"


"Do they have insurance? If they had insurance it should be fine."


"A man is his job"

Henry: Calm down Maury
Maury: Im Calm I want my fuckin money

I want to begin by saying TOMBSTONE is the absolute most quotable movie ever made. Every single line of dialogue delivered in its 130 minutes of running time is quotable - hilarious in their own right when used non sequitur yet also totally appropriate for certain situations. The list of "Memorable Quotes" on the IMDB page for TOMBSTONE is longer than the vast majority of Ugueth's Friday Boredom Threads, and doesn't cover but less than a third of all possible options. To make it official, I submit for your approval my top three lines from TOMBSTONE:





And these, too...

RIVERS EDGE





GYMKATA





FARGO

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Easily second Tombstone:

"You Tell Him I'm Coming, And Hell's Coming with me!"

"I'll put you out of your misery"
"Say When!"

_________________
team Mully & Hanley
team Meatpants

Third Tombstone
We don't need no law dog round here.

Kate ,without a bustle, how lewd!

Wyatt, you my only friend.

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When I am stuck and need to figure something out I always remember the Immortal words of Socrates when he said:"I just drank what?"

two people mention "tombstone" and don't even mention the most quotable quote from it: "I'm your huckleberry."

"Gymkata" has nowhere near the suckage that "The Wraith" or "Troll 2" does...or maybe even "Highlander 2: The Quickening" or "Phantasm 2".

Here's another:

"Team America"

Surprise, cockfags!

Maybe feelings are feelings because we can't control them.

Team, this is all my fault. I was overzealous in Cairo. I let racism cloud my judgment. I was so sure the ultimate terrorist was Middle Eastern, but I didn't realize he was a goddamn freebie. I'll never be a racist again.

I was nineteen years old when the musical Cats came to our town. I couldn't wait to see it. After the show I was asked if I wanted to go meet some of the performers backstage. Man, I was thrilled. But when I got back there, they were drunk and out of control. Rumpus Cat and Macavity kept feeling up my leg. I tried to leave, but, Rumpleteazer held me down, and... I was raped by Mr. Mistoffelees.

Whoa you gotta calm down there Chuck! See, there's three kinds of people: dicks, pussies, and assholes. Pussies think everyone can get along, and dicks just want to fuck all the time without thinking it through. But then you got your assholes, Chuck. And all the assholes want us to shit all over everything! So, pussies may get mad at dicks once in a while, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes, Chuck. And if they didn't fuck the assholes, you know what you'd get? You'd get your dick and your pussy all covered in shit!

Your skills are fading with age, Mrs. Sarandon.

Not enough love for Pulp Fiction guys.

Get with the program...

Will Ferrell's got a pretty solid record of quotable lines over the past decade. (Not that the movies were that great, but they grew on you).

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Disclaimer: Most of my posts are not suitable for work or home viewing.

The name's Rockmore. Beef Rockmore

or most of tarantino films...he has quite a quotable film library.

Wanted to avoid the obvious and leave some quotes for thirdings, fourthings, fifthings, etc. TOMBSTONE is the clear winner here.

Interesting fact: I've never seen Team America: World Police in its entirety. Need to have that fixed and soon - I imagine it'll age well, just as the original South Park movie has.

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