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Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
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Author:  Darkside [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 6:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
Hello stupids! It's the weekend, and it's time to vote for some douchebags. Isn't that special?

Last week, we elected Karl Malone as our Week 2 winner. He made a bunch of kids he doesn't do shit for, and you decided that makes him the week's biggest Douchebag. Way to be, Fanatics. Don't stand for that weird shit.

This week we've got Savages, ball hawks, guards, remote fans, girlfriends and killers, so check them out and vote!

Michael Savage: Our new mult Linderman Edgewater nominated batshit crazy right wing radio dick jockey (yeah that's right). He blames Obama, he thinks global warming is good, and he wrote a book about his dog. These things are all quite normal, and socially acceptable, but this guy had the nerve to fuck with NPR. Oh, and he knows where muslims are stockpiling their weapons. Maybe he can head to a mosque and get himself fitted for a suicide vest.

Zack Hample: FavreFan nominated him but never really, explained why, so I'll just guess. FavreFan was born a poor, white man in Mississippi in 1990, and is a victim of a disease called hypogonadotropic hypogonadism and has exceptionally bad swamp ass in the summer. Upon joining the Army, he was told that the Navy would probably be a better choice for him due to his lazy eye and his exceptional dandruff. When his tour was up, he moved to Chicago where he specialized in front runner fandom by picking that burrito Brett Favre and the Chicago Bulls. When Favre was sending pictures of his penis and crocs to various people, FavreFan was not amongst them, triggering a lifelong hatred of anyone named Zack. Oh, and Zac. And Zach. As such, he nominated this guy.

Binny's Security Guard: Nominated by Sabrmetric denier JORR, this Binny's guard was ready for WWIII and probably just praying someone would steal one of those little mini bottles of that Barefoot Wine shit that tastes like grape nightmare and gives you and instant migraine while causing severe gastrointestional distress and pain and gas. Now I know it's really important to be willing to kill people to protect overpriced scotch, but is it douchebaggy to be on the job in security dressed in full fatigues and looking like you cannot wait to kill someone (kind of like me at Lakemoorfest)?

Yankee fans from Morton Grove and Schaumburg: Once again another nomination from our own baseball historian and misunderstander JORR, who believes that you should never root for nor become a fan of a team that you're not particularly geographically close to. Now we here at the DBOTW home office are not sure what exactly the maximum distance is you're allowed to have from the team that you root for, or if it's some kind of state thing, or regional or whatever but apparently if you're from Illinois, rooting for the Yankees is exactly the same thing as having a toothbrush moustache and dancing down Devon Ave Sieg Heiling like a drunken Julie Andrews hopped on on street Molly. Is he right?

The Shooting Victims Girlfriend: Chronic masturbator and kidnapper beardown nominated the girlfriend of Philando Castile for recording the aftermath of the shooting that ultimately sparked a shit ton of violence. Beardown figures that as an expert in the field of women in traumatic situations that she should have tended to her dying boyfriend rather than document the murder that happened in front of her seconds prior. Hitting record on that phone may be the right thing to do if it stops the violence, or it might be the wrong thing to do if it sparks more violence, but is it the douchbag thing to do?

People who kill others: Frank Coztansa goes out on a limb and nominated murderers. I know right? He's way out there. Frank has a point though, I mean killing people is bad, unless someone of higher rank tells you to do it. Then... well then it's just fine. So, even though Frank went with a very unpopular opinion, we can't ignore his suggestion that people who murder others are douchebags. Do you agree?

Well folks, there are the week 3 nominees. We at the Douchebag of the Week Home Office hope that you vote early, often, and for the biggest douchebag that you see today.
Author:  Mr. Reason [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 6:57 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
I think we can all agree, this week's nominators are definitely douchebags.
Author:  Darkside [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 6:59 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
Mr. Reason wrote:
I think we can all agree, this week's nominators are definitely douchebags.

You didn't nominate anyone this week.
Author:  Frank Coztansa [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 7:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
Mr. Reason wrote:
I think we can all agree, this week's nominators are definitely douchebags.
I do not agree.
Author:  Mr. Reason [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 7:02 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
Darkside wrote:
Mr. Reason wrote:
I think we can all agree, this week's nominators are definitely douchebags.

You didn't nominate anyone this week.

Nothing gets past you, Hercule.

That doesn't make my statement any less accurate.
Author:  Mr. Reason [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 7:04 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
Frank Coztansa wrote:
Mr. Reason wrote:
I think we can all agree, this week's nominators are definitely douchebags.
I do not agree.

That makes me even more confident.
Author:  Hussra [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 7:13 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
No "fun" option? Image
Author:  leashyourkids [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 7:43 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
Gotta say "nice job" again to Darkside. You do a real nice job with this... like really nice.

Why do your regular posts suck so much?
Author:  Frank Coztansa [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 7:47 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
:lol:
Author:  Mr. Reason [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 7:48 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
leashyourkids wrote:
Gotta say "nice job" again to Darkside. You do a real nice job with this... like really nice.

Why do your regular posts suck so much?

At least Darko occasionally posts stuff that doesn't suck. Too bad the same can't be said for you.

Please keep on posting, however. You're bound to get a hit soon.
Author:  Darkside [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 7:54 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
leashyourkids wrote:
Gotta say "nice job" again to Darkside. You do a real nice job with this... like really nice.

Why do your regular posts suck so much?

Because I'm an idiot?
Author:  leashyourkids [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 8:02 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
Darkside wrote:
leashyourkids wrote:
Gotta say "nice job" again to Darkside. You do a real nice job with this... like really nice.

Why do your regular posts suck so much?

Because I'm an idiot?


I was kidding, of course. I see that Reason has been let out of pinochle early tonight. Who do you think wipes his ass for him?
Author:  Darkside [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 8:03 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
leashyourkids wrote:
Darkside wrote:
leashyourkids wrote:
Gotta say "nice job" again to Darkside. You do a real nice job with this... like really nice.

Why do your regular posts suck so much?

Because I'm an idiot?


I was kidding, of course. I see that Reason has been let out of pinochle early tonight. Who do you think wipes his ass for him?

He probably gave up with tp and got himself one of those ass fountains.
Author:  Mr. Reason [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 8:08 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
leashyourkids wrote:
Darkside wrote:
leashyourkids wrote:
Gotta say "nice job" again to Darkside. You do a real nice job with this... like really nice.

Why do your regular posts suck so much?

Because I'm an idiot?


I was kidding, of course. I see that Reason has been let out of pinochle early tonight. Who do you think wipes his ass for him?

I could pay cocksuckers like you to wipe my ass if I wanted. But, I still choose to do the job myself.

Sunday is euchre night, not pinochle.
Author:  leashyourkids [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 8:09 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
Ever play pitch, ya' hillbilly fuck?
Author:  Mr. Reason [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 8:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
leashyourkids wrote:
Ever play pitch, ya' hillbilly fuck?

Nope. But I have no doubt you've caught more than a few in your day.
Author:  Darkside [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 8:16 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
So that's a no on the ass fountain?
Author:  Mr. Reason [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 8:19 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
Darkside wrote:
So that's a no on the ass fountain?

You should probably keep your sexual proclivities to yourself, just saying.
Author:  Nas [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 8:22 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
Good stuff Darkside
Author:  Don Tiny [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 8:45 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
Darkside wrote:
So that's a no on the ass fountain?

Image
Author:  312player [ Sun Jul 10, 2016 11:17 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
^^^^^^^ lol. Best gif I've seen on this site.
Author:  W_Z [ Mon Jul 11, 2016 6:28 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
Darkside wrote:
triggering a lifelong hatred of anyone named Zack.


:cry: :cry: he said we were friends!
Author:  leashyourkids [ Mon Jul 11, 2016 9:49 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week, Week 3!
Don Tiny wrote:
Darkside wrote:
So that's a no on the ass fountain?

Image


I bet she's a very prude, conservative girl.
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