Chicago Fanatics Message Board
https://mail.chicagofanatics.com/

Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
https://mail.chicagofanatics.com/viewtopic.php?f=75&t=83976		 Page 1 of 2
Author:  Darkside [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 2:52 pm ]
Post subject:  Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
Ladies and gentlemen. It's Sunday, and it's time to vote for some douchebags.
Not the douchebag, mind you, but a douchebag. A douchebag who was nominated the previous Sunday thru Saturday. A douchebag who had garnered page clicks, responses and interesting conversation.
A douchebag that you want to see in the quarterfinals in 3 months.
A douchebag that you could vote for in a year as the douchebag of the Year 2014.

So, ladies and gentlemen, after a considerable Mac-Like absence... here are your top Week 1 Nominees! (if you didn't get your nomination included, either it sucked, no one cared, I hate you or there's something wrong with you, so don't bitch!)

family: pittmike has challenges with capitalization and with his wife, who he says treats him like everyone's wife treats them, as an ATM machine and like an unwashed sex toy that has dead batteries, too gross to wash and use and simply easier to replace than repair. He'll get nothing for Christmas, but he won't like it, because she's more worried about herself than him... but there's more. He's got some tail on the side, and it's not Jimmy's Corgi. Is his wife a douchebag for not buying her cheating husband a present? You decide!

Duck Dynasty Controversy: Bigfan makes a rare non-all-capitals-post to complain that the issue of the gay-hating hillybilly has gotten so much attention and the fact that a reality star being real has real consequences. Really. The issue also highlights the complete misunderstanding of the 1st amendment, the gays, the straights, the goddies and the crowd who just loves a good fight. Is it silly that we're so offended that a weirdo hillybilly hates gays? Is the whole situation douchebag worthy? Vote!

"Do you want to sign up for our blah blah blah card today?": Every single fucking time we go to Walgreens or Jewels or to whatever shop they still have in Iowa that has electricity Lipidquadcab is bombarded with demands for store loyalty and he is sick to fuck of it and he's not going to take it anymore until he renews his Microsoft XBOX Live account and then he won't take it again anymore. Why do we have to have a loyalty card when all we want to buy is some lube, toilet paper, AA batteries and some eggnog? Really? Is it becoming crazy that we have to have these things? I mean, Jewel shitcanned the program, to much success, so is it douchebaggy to ask for, demand mmbership and demean people who don't have one? You decide!

"Happy Holidays" emails at work: leashyourkids probably doesn't like you if he works with you so don't email him to brag you're going on vacation and you enjoy working with him (which is probably a lie anyway) and that you hope he has a happy holiday because you irritate him and everyone on your distribution list with your bullshit. If you like the guy so much, drop by his desk and tell him happy holidays. Or say Merry Christmas if you don't mind being assaulted for saying something so un-PC but for gods sake man, don't clog the man's email box, or his man box or any other box. Are people who do this douchebags or is leash maybe a little grinchy?

Ladies and gentlemen, these were your top nominees for this week's Douchebag of the Week (Week 1). Please pick your favorite douchebag. The vote continues until Saturday, and the winner gets entered into the 1st Quarter Semifinals where 3 top picks will be sent to the finals at the end of the year. So... there you go.

And Merry Christmas. I really enjoy working with all of you.
Author:  Don Tiny [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 3:06 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
It's about got-damn time this came back.
Author:  Darkside [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 3:07 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
Don Tiny wrote:
It's about got-damn time this came back.

I love you too, Don.
Author:  jimmypasta [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 3:09 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
Thanks! This kind of stuff makes it even funner around here.
Author:  Peoria Matt [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 3:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
jimmypasta wrote:
Thanks! This kind of stuff makes it even funner around here.


And also more fun.

Good to have DBOTW back. It's kind of like the board's hater wednesday, except funny.
Author:  denisdman [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 3:39 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
Darkside wrote:
family: pittmike has challenges with capitalization and with his wife, who he says treats him like everyone's wife treats them, as an ATM machine and like an unwashed sex toy that has dead batteries, too gross to wash and use and simply easier to replace than repair. He'll get nothing for Christmas, but he won't like it, because she's more worried about herself than him... but there's more. He's got some tail on the side, and it's not Jimmy's Corgi. Is his wife a douchebag for not buying her cheating husband a present? You decide!


That is a damn good recap. Several of those lines are Rofl funny.
Author:  badrogue17 [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 3:40 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
Don Tiny wrote:
It's about got-damn time this came back.

Absolutely. Darko does a great job with this.
Author:  leashyourkids [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 4:13 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
:lol:

This thread is fantastic. Nice work, Darko.
Author:  NearWessSideHussra [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 4:49 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
No love-hate for Tulane grad and PR hack of the week, #14 J Sacco:


Image
Author:  Darkside [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 5:39 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
I honestly had no idea what the nomination was all about. It were confused.
Author:  NearWessSideHussra [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 5:44 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
Not sure I do either Image, at this point, might make more sense to dbag her for duck-lipping more than half these pics:

http://www.everyjoe.com/2013/12/20/work ... -hacked/#1

she looks cute in #2.

might've been interesting to have a Justine Sacco vs Righteously Indignant Tweeters db-off.
Author:  spanky [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 5:50 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
NearWessSideHussra wrote:
Image

Would.
Author:  pittmike [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 5:55 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
Would
Author:  leashyourkids [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 6:25 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
We know, Mike.
Author:  badrogue17 [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 6:27 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
leashyourkids wrote:
We know, Mike.

:lol:
Author:  Colonel Angus [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 6:27 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
Merry Christmas? Around here we say Feliz Navidad, Amigo.
Author:  Darkside [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 9:38 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
For the record, I pick the winner in the event of a tie. Don't give me the power. It goes to my head.
Author:  Elmhurst Steve [ Sun Dec 22, 2013 11:38 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
No excuse for not buying a Christmas present for a spouse. Winner, winner, chicken dinner.
Author:  Darkside [ Sat Dec 28, 2013 9:41 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
Voting is over and we have a tie.
Therefore, I choose the winner. Because I can.
I choose "family", although I do find the loyalty cards annoying as hell.
Author:  pittmike [ Sat Dec 28, 2013 9:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
Write in vote for Denisdman for being an asshole in the hockey gay thread.
Author:  Darkside [ Sat Dec 28, 2013 9:52 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
pittmike wrote:
Write in vote for Denisdman for being an asshole in the hockey gay thread.

No write ins. Solly.
Author:  Mr. Reason [ Sat Dec 28, 2013 9:58 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
I missed this. I never voted.
Author:  Zippy-The-Pinhead [ Sat Dec 28, 2013 10:04 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
DS - that was hilarious. I guess I need to pay more attention to your posts. Usually just skim through them but that was spot on. :alien:
Author:  denisdman [ Sat Dec 28, 2013 10:56 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
pittmike wrote:
Write in vote for Denisdman for being an asshole in the hockey gay thread.


I'd vote for that. Keep bumping this thread so I can read all the funny chit DS wrote.
Author:  Spaulding [ Sat Dec 28, 2013 11:23 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
I want to vote for darkside.
Author:  pittmike [ Sat Dec 28, 2013 11:25 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
I thank you all for taking pleasure in my hell.
Author:  Darkside [ Sat Dec 28, 2013 11:26 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
pittmike wrote:
I thank you all for taking pleasure in my hell.

I'm glad we shared it.
Author:  Darkside [ Sat Dec 28, 2013 11:27 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
Spaulding wrote:
I want to vote for darkside.

Board Members not eligible.
Author:  spanky [ Sat Dec 28, 2013 11:29 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
pittmike wrote:
I thank you all for taking pleasure in my hell.

You caught us all off guard with that one. It changed who you are on here in the eyes of a lot of people.

It happens from time to time on the CSFMB. People coast along as seemingly normal posters, then you find out they dry finger strangers in a cab on the way home to their fiance. Or that they charge their girlfriends to watch their cats. Or the even go from mostly normal to Panther in a matter of hours. Once something like that happens, people interact with those people in a different way.
Author:  Spaulding [ Sat Dec 28, 2013 11:31 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Douchebag of the Week! Weak 1! Vote! You suck!
I want to change, what can I say?
Page 1 of 2 All times are UTC - 6 hours [ DST ]
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group
https://www.phpbb.com/