Ladies and Gentlemen, it's Sunday and it's time to vote for some douchebags.
Last week's winner was "Family", which will not be recapped due to an unfortunate alcohol fueled situation in the Blackhawks section but suffice to say, um, so yeah! WOO! Family will be entered into the 1st quarter semifinals to compete with the next 12 winners to compete for a spot in the 2014 Douchebag of the Year Finals.
All right. Enough of that.

So here are your nominees for this week!

Chicago Bears: Peoria Matt nominated the Bears just prior to the end of an embarrassing loss to the Eagles. Had the won, they could have had the division but they blew it leading to today's soon to be embarrassing loss to the Packers. This nomination makes an odd precedent, can something be nominated before it happens? Can we just assume that something horrible is going to happen and it's going to be awful and Cutler will fuck it all up and throw like 7 picks and Forte can't shake the first tackle and Shea Mac will be playing offense for Green Bay and Conte gonna, well Conte... Anyway, were the Bears douchebags for losing or did we just kind of expect it?

Cracker Barrel: Ok I don't know about you but bigfan's recent embrace of the minuscule letter case is creeping me out big time. He always used to be all Pantherian and stuff and now I don't know. Anyway, he's douchebagging the always tacky Cracker Barrel, the place where you enter and exit thru the gift shop and eat low grade breakfast in between. They pulled the Duck Dynasty junk they sold, confident that they'll sell enough rain sticks and tee games to make up for the losses, then unpulled their Duck Dynasty junk and succumbed to the pressure of bearded hillbillies in greasy coveralls and flannels and straw hats and whatever else they wear. So is Cracker Barrel douchebaggy for going back on their moral values because of the moral values of people that fuck sheep? You decide!

People complaining about UPS and Fed Ex: sjboyd0137 (aka Boyd) nominates people who hired UPS and Fed Ex to deliver their Christmas Gifts and found their packages were late because of storms, bad weather, overloading and bad planning. We all knew that online shopping was exploding, right? Didn't UPS and Fed Ex prepare by bringing in more people? Didn't they figure out a way to alter the weather patterns and divert snow and cold to less active places of little to no cultural and personal significance like, say, Wilmington? But are people who complain about companies not being able to overcome the forces of nature douchebaggy? You decide.

People who smoke in cars with kids: RFDC nominated people who smoke in confined spaces with their kids present, but let's take for a moment about the fact that he took his kids to see Frozen. Its about some overprivileged bitch who tries to kill her sister and then the king and queen seek help from trolls. Trolls. What kind of nonsense is that? Whatever happened to the emergency room? Or call a doctor, or an ambulance? We're teaching our children that we should seek help from things that don't really exist, and oh yeah, the overprivileged bitch is scarred for life thinking that she's gonna hurt and kill people from then on because their parents seek some nutball homeopathic bullshit instead of using modern medical science. Whatever. Anyway, are people who smoke in cars with kids douchebags?

Well folks, these are your top nominees this week. Please vote and we'll send one of these to the semis in 12 short weeks!

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

IMU

I feel so honored to have my nomination included in Darkos poll.

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

I would like to change my vote.

Same here.