My wife's father left her mom when she was pregnant with her. Alcohol, gambling, and other women were more important to him. Over the next few years he made zero effort to see my wife or her sisters.

When my wife turned 21 years old she got a birthday card in the mail that had a dollar in it. One FUCKING dollar to your daughter on a her 21st birthday after you have stiffed the family for any child support. My wife pretty much wrote him off for good after that and has had no contact with him.

This morning she gets a message from a family member that says her father wants to know if it would be ok if they could be facebook friends. He would like to see how things are going for her.


Are fucking kidding me?!?!?!? 40 years after you have a daughter you suddenly decide now that you want to be facebook friends???? You cannot spend any effort or money on getting to know your children and now all of a sudden you want to be facebook friend?

Fuck you, you are an absolute piece of shit and if I ever have the opportunity to meet you in person I am going tell you that to your face.

_________________
"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

you got one with daddy issues, freaks in bed and their low self-esteem means you'd have to murder their mother two times --no, wait, kill my mother one more time and I'm outta here, swear to god--before they'd consider hitting the road.

Also...Facebook friend isn't the same as joining the family.

As you get older, you realize you may have some regrets. And you may try to repair what you can.

What is the harm?

_________________
Rick Hahn is the best GM in baseball.

If there is a greater life experience than true forgiveness, then I have yet to discover it.

_________________

2 for $5 Beef n Cheddars

_________________
Rick Hahn is the best GM in baseball.

_________________
Good people drink good beer - Hunter S. Thompson

<º)))><

Waiting for the time when I can finally say
That this has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way

Never realized you married Joe Walsh's daughter

Super serious Don Henley agrees...



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ncF6q3QeltU

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

Well now that I have had some time to cool off and think it over, I understand what you are saying.

There is no harm in it and forgiveness is always a good thing.

However, if you get to a point in life where you have regrets and want to repair a relationship with your child then you should pick up the phone and call them or at least do something that is a little more personal than sending a message via another family member.

I just do not understand how a father of children could just walk away from them and every 20 years or so throw them a bone. It is pathetic to me.

I have told my wife I will support whatever she wants to do in this situation. I will understand if she wants to tell him to go fuck himself and I will understand if she wants to open a small door to interact with him.

_________________
"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

Birth of a child
Great sex

_________________
Be well

GO BEARS!!!

She doesn't have to let him into her life but forgiving him and moving beyond it would be a relief for her.

_________________
Be well

GO BEARS!!!

Birth of a child, yes.

But the ability to forgive someone who has so terribly wronged you, or abandoned you, or beaten you or abused you in some way, is like dropping a large weight in that has weighed you down since it happened.

_________________

I believe a strong case was made in the "alcohol, gambling, and other women" portion of RFDC's post.

Also, someone needs to post something about Glenn Frey now.

_________________
I don't remember half the time if I'm hiding or I'm lost

The depth of your personality is virtually limitless.

_________________

I think you can make a stronger case that people turn to those things when forgiveness is elusive.

_________________

I wouldn't go so far as to say there's no harm in it, I would think if he's still an asshole there could be some negatives. I'd still say it's a risk worth taking, but you never know.

Maybe he's ashamed of his dwarfism and that's why he stayed away?

_________________
Proud member of the white guy grievance committee

It aint the six minutes. Its what happens in those six minutes.

_________________
I don't remember half the time if I'm hiding or I'm lost

Vertically challenged American.

_________________
Good people drink good beer - Hunter S. Thompson

<º)))><

Waiting for the time when I can finally say
That this has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way

Maybe he needs money

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

I will send him a buck in a fathers day card

_________________
"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

I wasn't kidding. Have a similar situation. After YEARS got a phone call, "Oh Dee DoubleYew I love you so much miss you you don't understand how hard it was for me please forgive me I love you by the way can I borrow $6,000 I'm in some trouble."

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

yeah, I can guarantee you if that is the case then that will forever slam the door shut in my wifes mind.

No way in the world we are giving the guy money

_________________
"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

_________________
Successful calls:

Kyrie Irving will never win anything as a team's alpha: check
T.rubisky is a bust: check
Ben Simmons is a liability: check
The Fields Cult is dumb: double check

2013 CSFMB ROY

Send him an IOU then.

_________________

Have him write a 500-word essay - double spaced - stating his case for inclusion. This should allow you the time to complete a thorough background/public records search.

_________________
Sex isn't dirty, sex isn't a crime. It's a loving act between two or more consenting adults.

-Hank Kingsley

Killer app.

_________________
Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

They are more important to all of us, fancy pants.

_________________
O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

I'm assuming you're complimenting me as a multi-faceted individual.

Many thanks.

_________________
Rick Hahn is the best GM in baseball.

update: My wife accepted his friend request. Sent him a message asking him nicely why after all these years he decided he want to reach out to her. So far he has not answered.

He has also sent a friend request to my high school daughter, which led to a good discussion. So I guess that was productive.

I am hopeful the guy just wants to make things right in his old age. If he has some type of ulterior motives I just might lose it.

_________________
"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."