The parents gave the man the last name, dbag them.

Probably the sort who wear rubber gloves and an apron while emasculating themselves doing dishes like a pro. If you're gonna do dishes every now and then, best to make a mess, break a glass or two and leave dried-on food inside some pots and such. They'll quickly say forget it and take over so you can grab a beer and go watch hockey.

hyphenated last names are for royals and bastards

shout out of Happy Hour Jason with this thread

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

I always assumed the explosion of men with hyphenated names is just the result of the increase in children born out of wedlock. Kind of a sad consequence.

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Hawaii (fuck) You

The "royals" typically use their first initial instead of their full first name. M Ryan Smith or J Doug Jones.

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Hawaii (fuck) You

That was a funny thread, I still miss her a lot.

Names are something people have no control over. I've never liked my name, it's not my fault, I didn't get a choice.

Is it hyphenated? A friend of mine's kid had a hyphenated name, but I guess he didn't like it and his old man wasn't around anyway, so he dropped the second part. One of his idiot teachers started deducted points from his assignments because he wasn't using the whole name.

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

No, it's just stupid.

Why did Spaulding refer to Happy Hour Jason as her?

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Elections have consequences.

I don't know why you say that. It is unique and elegant without being pretentious.

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

She was a woman who chose a male name so that we wouldn't give her a hard time, initially.

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You just say that because you know me, it's a fitting name then.