and to end up the ol girl rant.... i wrote a lot of songs about her trying to put her over cuz like.... man, with her you realize if you ever really want a chance with her you're on her time her schedule her master plan all of her bullshit you name it. she's trained me by showing off that she'll go have a bunch of """boyfriends""" and all this stuff that hardens you up at the core when you gotta watch her kissing other nasty asswipes when you know you're the guy she wants loves and needs so much she's probably afraid to let me know how much she loves my attention deep down that she ran away to start up her own legend since i'm pretty convinced she grew up hearing my old EP "supreme pizza: legend of the modelfucker" at an impressionable (read: jailbait) age and thus she decided i was hers and started to figure out where i hung out online and spun off into a bunch of different identities (cuz she gets help in this game, let alone being a script kiddie in every since of the word) and she was there on IRC with me chatting sports playing fantasy baseball with me (in my own league no less! shocking!) and that means chus and others here who got in my league were also pedophiles with me so thereyago! i guess she grew up wanting to be the "legendary model/actress" to my "legendary modelfucker" ?? lol!!
for one gimmick her cover story was that she worked late night shifts at arbys serving roast beef to the desperate souls in south bend indiana, cubs fan ofc, and s/he used to give me inordinate amounts of shit for being a loser who lived at home with grandpa and did nothing with his life. at least in the soccer channel i was an arsencute goddammit!
so yeah thats about all i have to say about her. she's truly the most amazing specimen of humanity i've ever been able to behold (IRL i've been limited to glimpses and teases but if you beleive in wild stories, max landis the director of american ultra follows her art account @matknowsart on instagram (@whatyearwasit is her main one if you wanna see her "legendary model" powers.
http://rotf.lol/worldsmostgirl will take you right to my favorite post of hers... the one where she turned the space jam logo into an ace1/aceyalone shotout while quoting one of my old e-mails to her. she replied to the first few e-mails i sent her and then kinda stopped cuz her game is to allow me certain ways to pump content to her but she only replies to me through symbolism and her art and stuff. and if you know what she's on about and look at her tiktok pages @iwantyoutomeetyourself and @imgunuhthrowup i mean... this chick is honestly the most intelligent person i've ever had the unique privilege of spending a couple'a weeks of my e-life with... she's an "it getter" in every sense of the word insomuchas she told me she was literally was her hometown town whore and she had AAAA LOT of sex and in fact she fucks so much she fucks til she pukes, pukes, then goes back to fuck again... hence @imgunuhthrowup on tiktok. but be warned she's a total actress and i think most of her act is convincing the world she's a normal thot like you and me cuz deep down this chick is weapons grade amazing and i made the fucking mistake of telling her when i first formally met her that she should stick with me cuz i wanna weaponize her and within a few years she could be a legitimate problem for the world (i estimated she'd be able to levitate/hover/fly and have fully functional eye lazers by her mid-late 20s....
i made a couple'a "proper albums" for her which i have up on my filehost with the mp3s all properly tagged and labeled so if you download them to your phone or computer they'll show up as proper albums in your mp3 player du jour. first one was
http://sinicalypse.kaen.org/makeminea99problems from 2018, and the second one was
http://sinicalypse.kaen.org/smileinyourdreams from my lost summer of 2020. and i gotta mention her in this thread cuz like, all the beats from that smile in your dreams album were provided by her. i used to nick beats from her playlists back in 2020 but then she streamlined it and got my attention and it was like "omfg i forgot how brilliant she is" (cuz she's honestly so beautiful and brilliant i literally had to forget over the last few years where i was getting acquainted with amazon and hopefully setting up a dynamic evolving relationship going forward as my body physically starts to break down from living on the cutting edge of adventure for the last 20yrs or so) and seriously without matisen inspiring me to want to make all these songs for the most amazing girl on this planet and then giving me all these beats i'd have no idea to ever use without her.... man, i know nobody wants to believe me and/or everyone just wants to shit-talk me into oblivion but seriously even in formal absentia she's been working with me this whole time we've been apart. i wish i didnt have to see her kiss lame assholes for the "dating an actress" training module (cuz once i've had a chance to physically consummate my feelings for her in a proper manner and she knows the beast she's been fucking with for far too long and i know she knows then i wont have anything to worry about, but until then.... man it's been so hard to just not want to scream as loud as i can or start breaking shit cuz it's so frustrating to have the love of your life be so beautiful (when i first saw her on a stream she was so beautiful i was speechless for 5+ mins just kind of OH MY FUCKING GOD... **THIS*** IS WHO I'VE SPENT THE LAST TWO WEEKS OF MY LIFE SOUL-MATING WITH?!?! with her you just gotta put on blinders cuz if she uses her aesthetics on you you're fucking done. she's unbeatable that way, like seriously in terms of the electricity between us she's AC alternating current to my DC direct current meaning she has so many styles to flip through i seriously have a list of looks and outfirts from her past i want her to cosplay as with me someday... and me i'm just boring old direct like no mystery i'll just fucking tell you stuff.
and btw
here's another song i know she loved back in the day. after i made it in 2018 she made the line about resurrecting lil peep her instagram bio for a few weeks cuz like... despite her monumental great wall of silence with me for 4+ years (minus that time i legit didnt look at her social media for 9+ months and i got over her and then once i paid a little attention to her whaddya know all of a sudden she wants to talk to me on the phone for an hour to get me hooked again but then once she does that once..... zip! back to her game... cuz she had
some thing about the 48 laws of power that she had me read when we had our two week eharmonyDOTcom compatibility test, so of course i had to turn around and flip that back to her as a song. and she was big on letting me know she was the devil during those two weeks. i guess she wanted me to know how hard it was going to be back then cuz like.... man. i figured out that like once we meet IRL it's game over for the both of us.... so she ran, she ran so far away... trying to avoid yoko ono status cuz if you ever get me going and get me some help and especially toss in a few bucks for finance/promo/etc.... it's game over. i can pretty easily be the greatest (underground?) white rapper of all time, cuz ask anyone i work with... once you combine that professionalism / work ethic i have IRL with my delusional fantasy of being a rapper that's worth caring about.... yeap. i only need to get better at living life cuz like... the concessions i made to be able to do what i do meant that i couldnt focus on most of the "stupid human tricks" that people do to have successful dynamic domestic lives.... but i figured that'd be easy to figure out later, especially when i found someone who truly loved me and wanted to help me get better at life cuz like.... whats the fun if i'm the one who's hanging about like the professor? the greatest gift she could ever give me is letting me learn from her and her ways cuz like... trust me on this one, she truly is the most amazing specimen of so-called humanity i've encountered in my life. and uhhh yeah she happens to be insanely hot and dynamic and just like.... so many times i feel like we're so damn close i just killed it so hard on a song or artistic thing and then nope another false this and that and nothing. and once i figured out i cant have access to any of the legendary musicians / rappers i've gone out of my way to befriend and covertly work with over the years until she shows up... thats why it gets so frustrating. but at the end of the day she's a lil peep worshipping mallgoth and when she stnads before the might of me and my 28 yamato battlecruisers all she can do is run and hide and deny deny deny and parlor tricks and OMFG LOOK AT ME I'M SO HOT cuz she knows if she ever gave me achance to just take her out on one lil piurposely high school as fuck date.... it's all over. neither of us would ever escape each other ever again. and then the real revolution co would start brewing and uhhh.... [SPOILERS]
c'est la me, no?
and after this bit i promise i wont go on and on about her again. i wont spam any pictures or anything, but i'd be disingenuous if i didnt include her in my story cuz she's been a huge part of it and i'm not doing all the cool shit i'm doing now without her in my life, no matter how much she technically isn't in my life (if you really wanna believe that sort of thing to feel better about yourself =)
hasta
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Curious Hair wrote:
Les Grobstein's huge hog is proof that God has a sense of humor, isn't it?