so to anyone who paid attention to the 14/15 EuroSeason Thread(TM) you might have caught shirtless driver informing me that last saturday there was an aphex twin blimp spotted over london! not quite a goodyear-blimp size airship, but a sizeable enough blimp to get noticed at the low-end electronic music festival it casually strolled by with the aphex 7\ logo on one side and 2 (7\) 1 4 on the other side. no press releases or AVAILABLE ON ITUNES!!!!! crap.... just a fucking blimp over london. it's like someone went to the KLF school of marketing, eh?



now THAT, my friends, is how you announce your proper return to the music world after a 13 year gap between the last proper (2x)LP drukQs and the new one, which i believe is called syro. on monday the official @AphexTwin account tweeted a tor onion link (you know, the deep dark web! scary stuff!) that went to a page with a tracklisting for those who got a tor browser going, as us regular browser lames just got redacted information because aphex twin desires you to plunge into the deep dark web to find out his info!

01 minipops 67 (source field mix) ............ 04:47 / 120.2
02 XMAS_EVET10 (thanaton3 mix) ............... 10:31 / 120
03 produk 29 ................................. 05:03 / 101
04 4 bit 9d api+e+6 .......................... 04:28 / 126.26
05 180db_ .................................... 03:11 / 130
06 CIRCLONT6A (syrobonkus mix) ............... 06:00 / 141.98
07 fz pseudotimestretch+e+3 .................. 00:58 / 138.85
08 CIRCLONT14 (shrymoming mix) ............... 07:21 / 152.97
09 syro u473t8+e (piezoluminescence mix) ..... 06:32 / 141.98
10 PAPAT4 (pineal mix) ....................... 04:18 / 155
11 s950tx16wasr10 (earth portal mix) ......... 06:01 / 163.97
12 aisatsana ................................. 05:21 / 102

Bonus Track for Japan
13 MARCHROMT30A edit 2b 96 ................... ##:## / 104.980

----

naturally, many of the other diehards have started going through the unreleased aphex tracks he's played @ live gigs over the years (metz 2011/12/whatever comes to mind) and started trying to match up BPMs.... and suffice to say we're fucking excited because it's been almost 13yrs since his last proper (2x)LP drukQs, which was bonafide enough to get kanye west to sample/loop avril 14th for a cut. and he's like yeezus christ and shit so you know you're more legit than jim jeffries when kanye is rocking out on top of one of your throwaway piano tracks.

some people on this board worship billy corgan, others phish.... well this is "my guy" when it comes to music. aphex twin is the fucking man. i personally think he got a taste of the top/pop-end of the music industry circa 97-98 and promptly fucked off for ~3+ years between the windowlicker EP (1998) and drukQs (oct 2001) with only a bunch of old str8up analogue equipment tracks (the analord series) getting a release in 2005 (and keep in mind you can go dig up livesets from 01-02 with analord tracks on them) so then aside from the occasional "it's not aphex twin (but hey it's aphex twin)" EP like the tuss' "rushup edge" there's been a lot of radio silence from the man, the myth, the legend.

who else does that? it's the equivalent of the prodigy dropping off of the face of the earth after they released "firestarter", and thank god they didn't do that because i don't know what my life would be like without "smack my bitch up" or the inevitable 3-4 proper LPs since then that i haven't made any effort to listen to, but are surely transcendental works of art (a friend of mine used to date a chick who worked for MTV and was supposedly responsible for getting old YO! MTV RAPS reruns played on MTV europe we had a spirited argument @ cubs/expos opening day 03 about how she thought the prodigy was overall more important to electronic music than aphex twin. coincidentally i think that was just about the last time we ever hung out =)

yeah to give you an idea of how centrifugal aphex twin is to us who were into "techno" (later "IDM" aka "intelligent dance music" a term that aphex Himself has shat on over the years. his record label eventually offered up "braindance" which is more apropos) in the mid 90s, i remember that an old friend halluciphile came out to see venetian snares with me in 2008. we ended up befriending some younger kids who invited us over to pull a few tubes after the show, so on the way back to the 2-flat with these snares show kids one of them starts getting all philosophical in the back of the car.... snares did his CD-DJ thing to the fullest and if you're into aggro superspazzy tracker music that i affectionately refer to as "the piss beer of the so-called IDM world" then snares delivered that in spades that night. so as mr. sartre got to ruminating over things, he said something like "man, i know you old guys all worship aphex twin, but i'm telling you that what we saw tonight.... man.... snares is doing it so fucking fantastic that aphex twin was never even close to this level. you saw the way he owned the room.... snares is the present and the future while aphex twin is the past. whatever aphex twin started snares has taken the torch and perfected it on a level that aphex twin could never touch!"

the car immediately screeched to a stop and then pulled over really quickly. duncan then turned around and said "kid, i don't know who the fuck you think you are but you're not riding in this car if you're going to talk like that, ok? it was a fine show tonight, granted, but i will not stand for blasphemy in my automobile.... got it?"

see at one point in terms of high-variance post-4-to-the-floor-techno aphex twin was all there was. squarepusher eventually showed up in earnest by late 96 / early 97 and autechre started early but didnt really start hitting their peak until 94-97, but they were never as personable and dare-i-say-emotional as aphex twin. i'd say that at his peak (richard d james EP/LP, hangable auto bulb 1+2, come-to-daddy/windowlicker) he was making badass futuristic children's music. before 4chan made it trendy to label anyone not in lockstep with the groupthink of the day an "autist" aphex twin was making indelibly different music that many have labeled "personal" by saying stuff like "it's like he made an album for himself to enjoy and we're lucky enough to hear it" --- and yeah obviously anyone who knows me knows that such a raison d'etre is centrifugal to my musical experience (especially the "you're lucky to hear it" part =) and well, when he had his first "big" music video in come to daddy the video literally featured a bunch of little kids in aphex twin masks throwing rocks at old people. suffice to say it's a brilliant fucking metaphor and the world is a lesser place for those rumors of chris cunningham (director) and aphex (soundtrack) teaming up to do a film version of william gibson's "neuromancer" that would have done great justice to the original work.

btw, i like to think of myself as one of those kids in the aphex twin mask throwing rocks at old people.

so yeah TL;DR aplenty.... but when you get into CSFMB musical vanity threads about someone's musical hero/es, welp, i assume that this isn't for 95% of the people here (especially the 75%+ majority who see a "sinicalypse" post and see paragraph #2 and tap out right away =) but for the few "it-getters" out there i just wanted to go a bit longform here to give you an idea of the !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that comes with this. when i heard his recently "leaked" long-unreleased "album" from 1992-93 a few months back i had tears in my eyes.... not cuz it's some OMFG THANK YOU RICHARD!!!! 100% total fanboy worship, but because at that moment in time i was transported back to the mid/mid-late 90s when i used to be able to get new aphex twin music and it was such a !!!!!!! in my world... i mean imagine being ~16 years old when come to daddy hit and it was kicking ass all over MTV and it's like "holy shit my favorite musician is going to be one of the biggest pop musicians in the world! he's going to rise up and upgrade everyone's standards! pop music will improve because aphex twin and squarepusher are coming!"

fortunately they're way too brilliant for that, especially aphex who as i covered b4 promptly fucked off from the pop/music scene after they got him on magazine covers doing one-eye-symbolism through a hand gesture that would later be known worldwide as "the HOVA pyramid" or whatever you call that shit jay-z does when he gets everyone in the crowd to throw up a pyramid/esque handsignal saying "GETCHA ROCS UP!! EVERYONE GETCHA ROC UP!!!!" ---- yeah aphex was privy to that all the way back in 1997 and i like to think the guy saw what being that popular entailed and promptly exited stage left like the hero you could argue he is.

or hell you can say he just saw what the KLF did and thought "man, what if someone did that but actually made brilliant music?" and took it to the next level. or you can call him "musical sandpaper" and bemoan his seeming inability to make nice straightforward music and say he's the master of the slag-off. sure. have fun with that as long as my friend duncan von halluciphile isn't driving you.

but what you gotta admit is that this dude is a bonafide musical legend. he's been around since like.... shit, 1991? by 92-93 he was well established and on his way, and when he eventually got on mtv..... he fucked off. and take it from a guy who makes the world, let alone the CSFMB, a better place when he fucks off: there's an artform to fucking off.

so of course there will be super-unrealistic expectations for this album to not just cure cancer, but also singlehandedly gentrify the world economy and quite possibly also have the blueprints to a working nuclear fusion reactor discernable in a hidden track played through a spectrograph (just like this came up when you did that with the equation track off of windowlicker)



but hey.... who knows? in the age of digital media thsi guy's idea of getting something #trending is to fly a fucking blimp over london. he's probably got a batsignal if needed. so when THAT GUY decides that it's been long enough and it's time to release one of those "six unreleased albums" he claimed to have a few years back, welp, it's kind of a pretty big fucking deal even tho he's just a guy who most normal people remember as "the guy with all of those damn CDs clogging up the fiona apple shelf" still.... you know.... man. oh fucking man. this kicks the shit out of the rumors he was maybe gonna produce a die antwoord* album, eh?

* = i'm sure curious hair has some thoughts on die antwoord that would likely speak for me here. i'm sure he bumps their music a lot after he's done with his daily hour of tribute to the magnanimous alice glass, who last i heard was brave enough to play a show with a patriot missile stuck up her ass ready to explode but she "wasn't going to let her fans down" --- what a brave brave woman.

and thus ends the last traditional siniTLDR post you'll get for awhile.... but when it's a new fucking aphex twin album comeon, this was the message that i was born to post. SHOMER SHABBOS!!!! * pounds table *

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Hah, I haven't busted out Crystal Castles' debut album in forever. One of those ideas that seemed like a cool little toss-off but couldn't possibly sustain a second album. I felt the same way about Sleigh Bells and The Go! Team. Back when Hipster Runoff was around, they made fun of Alice Glass and her fans by posting some video -- long gone, sadly -- of a guy in a black hood undergoing a veritable St. Vitus dance to "Alice Practice." One of the funniest things I've ever seen on youtube and now it's gone without a trace.

But anyway, I'm looking forward to hearing new Aphex Twin now that I'm finally exploring his catalogue past Richard D. James Album and Selected Ambient Works 2.

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wow, it's like i shined the CHsignal here tonight, eh? yeah honestly i only discovered alice glass through a celebrity thread on 4chan's wankoff board, but her wikipedia page is hilarious in describing her struggles to overcome adversity to perform for her fans. hell the other day somebody asked me what the meaning of life was and i offered this 1min 4 sec video as the definitive answer.

i think alice glass is the teenage punk rock girl that just about everybody wanted to fuck back in the day when they used to rock and roll with JORR, cuz i mean, who didnt want to find out how freaky the pink mohawked girl was in the sack? i was fortunate enough that my one proper ex-GF was indeed a pink mohawked girl who was seriously so brilliant that she made me look simple and contrived in comparison. and i was 26 to her freshly-turned-18. that kind of shit doesn't happen where someone, especially a girl, is just so completely beyond me cognitively/creatively that i'm thinking "wow i'm the luckiest sonofabitch on earth that i have this girl's attention, let alone loins" and i had a goofy long distance relationship that i in no way shape or form deserved, but enjoyed the hell out of it to the point where that chick was so hell-free that she could take over for st. peter at any point she wanted.

to balance things out, she once told me that this song i slagged off was her favorite song of all time. my response was seriously ".....what the fuck is wrong with you?" a question that i'm sure many would ask her if they knew that she spent roughly ~$5000 to be around me as much as she could over a 10 month period.

but yeah, in that sense alice glass reminds me of the ex/quintessential-teenage-punker-girlfrend and i'll always smile remembering that my ex was a giant bjork fan (literally she's like 6 feet tall) and her room had a big ol bjork "b" sticker up on the window and after i came through aside from leaving her with a complimentary set of all the pre-pink-line L maps from train cars (and the q-ambient wear / KMFDM (money) shirts she kept), i also left her with a giant fucking "A" to one-up that little lower case "b" that she had on her window. perhaps the cheesiest line i ever kicked was early on in the relationship she insisted on i told her that me and aphex twin are a package deal and someday when she dumps me it's gonna be like "FUCK YOU JAMES!!! AND APHEX TWIN TOO!!!!"



also, if you tilt your head to the left the logo is basically a guy sitting there with a massive erection but HEEEEEYYYYYY NOW.

so CH, any thoughts on die antwoord, aka the reason i busted out the CH-signal? some people dare to ask if they're truly "anti-illuminati" artists out there fighting the good fight (on a major label no less) and yeah, some people think that.... some people think "we" landed on the moon in 1969. there's a lot of idiots out there, what can i say?

oh and btw, when the breakup came it wasn't FUCK YOU AND APHEX TWIN TOO!!!! she cried so much and so continuously she couldn't phrase any words so when her mom called up the next morning to say that we'll always be great friends for the rest of our lives that's when i was like "oh.... she dumped me"

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Your excitement for the new Aphex Twin record is similar to my excitement when I read that My Bloody Valentine was putting a new record out after 22 years last year.
And in my mind, the wait was WELL worth it. I hope you get the same satisfaction out of syro.
Then again, you love Aphex Twin WAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY more than I love mbv. That's saying something.
I applaud your dedication.
I dl'd the Caustic Window torrent, (forgot which folder it's in )and at one point, I did own SAW2 and I care because you do, and
I also had a cd-ep, or cd-single with what I then considered to be his most listener friendly track on it,
whose name I can't remember for the life of me. Any ideas?
I probably sold them at Dog Ear in Libertyville or some shit because I just never really got it.
I think I'm gonna put on my headphones, and scour YouTube for the next hour to see if I get it now.
BTW, that cd-single or ep was in a digi-pack, not a jewel case, if that's any help on id'ing it.

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Just chillin' like Garret Quillin.

The EP was "On".
I bought it because I used to subscribe to CMJ, and it was on one of their samplers.
Shit, I was 19, not in college, but I still subscribed to CMJ.

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Just chillin' like Garret Quillin.

hell yeah shirtless! you're a top-shelf CSFMBer in my book cuz you like to hang out in soccer threads and inform me when there's aphex twin blimps flying over london. top lad. if we're ever at a CSFMB function depending on how my on/off relationship with cash is going, it would be my honor do cover as much of your beer tab as i can.

yeah on is a good single.... on also has a music video that was on "come to viddy" which was a compilation of the on / donkey rhubarb / come to daddy videos that was dropped to sell the brilliant chris cunningham / aphex twin collab that was the come to daddy video. my very authentic back-in-the-day VHS still has a nice burn on the case/tape from an incense stick that was burned in my friends room while we had to smoke a bowl. no doubt he was the type to try and play "hits from the bong" or some dumb cypress hill shit whenever we smoked weed like ritual and i was the guy like "HEY LET'S WATCH DOSE ONE VS EMINEM VS JUICE IN THE SCRIBBLE JAM FINALS"

perfunctory youtubings of those 3 songs should yield the videos, unless there's cnuts(sic... cuz sinicalypse is for the children!) out there who yanked those videos off of youtube, just like i recently noticed the 3-4 uploads of the super bowl shuffle are off of youtube and somebody had to re-upload the brilliant ode to the 85 bears that the 86 rams did called "let's ram it"

but yeah i mean i'm not coming into this in need of religious experience or anything.... but that said i do have faith in THE ONE TRUE RDJ (cuz he was rdj long before robert downey jr reclaimed his throne as the world's rdj after some drugged out years in the 90s/00s) to make something worth listening to. i mean the dude's idea of signaling a new album isn't to go on twitter and direct you to his indiegogo page like my guys latyrx/lyrics-born did (i like to believe that lateef lets LB do that.... super sad face emoticon goes here) he just puts a fucking logoed blimp up over london.

THAT GUY should be able to make some fun music.

and well, about aphex twin.... man still to this day i have aphex twin friends. that in and of itself should say something. when he tweeted the tor onion link about the new album i had 3-4 texts to send out cuz new afx = you're getting that text. people come together. there should be some special civil awareness sirens out there in lieu of new aphex.... cuz it might be like 1/1000 who "get it" but i mean.... the dude's legit. he does what he does and the world is a better place for it cuz yeah it's just music and all.... but i can't reiterate enough that this guy was on the cusp of, say, prodigy-level-popculture-stardom and he walked away from it and never looked back. and i think he's been making music the whole time, but with his finances set (and supposedly a c-nut of a now-ex-wife who many think he sandbagged by waiting to release this so she isn't gonna get a lot of the proceeds cuz like, a new aphex twin album isn't WATCH OUT KATY PERRY HE'S COMING FOR THAT #1 SPOT.... but it's guaranteed sales to a diehard fanbase. even people who used the 13 year gap between proper LPs to go elsewhere.... people are gonna come back. guys like you are gonna check it out. worldly dudes like CH are gonna check it out... and i would bet that he doesn't let us down. sure the album can never live up to the expectations most ppl who worship at my level will put on it, but still..... i think it's gonna be better than squarepusher's last album by a country mile.... and i say that as a guy who hears this track and then has to do the obligatory radio DJ talkover at the end to give time/temp/traffic cuz i dream of a world where i pop on the radio and hear shit like this.

pity my old laptop's HD crashed cuz i had bootlegged the whole july 5th squarepusher show and only uploaded like ~3 tracks (youtube.com/user/sinicalypse) and unless they're still on my camcorder i lost the ceephax bootlegs too. yeah if you check my videos on there you'll see that i dont fuck around when i bootleg a show.

and i really should eventually find an event worthy of busting out the artistically-autographed ceephax acid crew shirt i've got. but c'est la vie. i'm still sitting on a 2-3 sizes too small chemlab tour shirt from 95 that says FUCK KILLING LETS FUCK on the back and i proudly made it til 8th period in HS wearing it b4 that teacher miss johnson came up and said "....did you really think you could get away with wearing that?" to which i said "it's 8th period, isn't it?"

so yeah TL;DR enough about me/you/etc let's keep it aphex! who wants to hear about my brilliant ex-girlfriends and my wardrobe! somewhere somebody like redskingreg is thinking "THIS IS THE CSFMB! BITCH ABOUT BERNSTEIN COME UP WITH THEORIES ON MITCH'S NEXT HIRE OR GO THE FUCK HOME!"

tho hey if he's washington nationals in nas' league i gotta thank the dude for not trading with me cuz he wanted to rape me to give up yordano ventura, and in fairness i did have 2-3 offers for jose abreu before his first power spurt had him .286/4/14.... i tried. had to settle for edwin encarnacion tho, as i managed to wing a deal where i talked brett lawrie and robbie ray up and gave away a bunch of cash and picks to get edwin encarnacion, ben revere (.300+ / 37SB for my team that needed SB. chus has 5 this week but i've got 8 thus far so keep rolling) and hideki kuroda and yeah.... if kolten wong has 1 or 2 more ~5HR / 4SB weeks where he almost singlehandedly wills me to weekly HR/SB victories, shit, he could be the shrewd pickup of the season (especially in the wake of dumping my longterm 2B project lawrie) provided matt moore doesn't return as jesus christ next season.

oh yeah holy shit i'm off topic.... on a sports board... cuz this is the aphex twin thread!

* raises gatorade to the haters *

anyways shirtless, do me a favor and say a prayer for arsenal on wednesday cuz like... holy shit. that match @besitkas on tuesday, albeit a 0-0 draw but still a red so no ramsey on wednesday.... man if arsenal misses the CL ..... just.... way to make an everton game meaningless, eh? i almost dont wanna see ozil/mert out there for a full 90 because we need wednesday and once we make the CL group... aghhh.

LESS BABBLE / MORE AFX.

but then again anyone dumb enough to click on an aphex twin started by sini deserves whatever vexation they get =D

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Chelsea is the only London team I actively dislike, so I'll say a prayer for your Gooners.
Monday's match between Liverpool and Man City is gonna be a tough one for me.
My heart is with Liverpool, but City are my second favorite team, D'you You Know What I Mean?
But it's at the Etihad. So advantage City. Maybe we'll know tomorrow if "Why Always Me" signs on the line that is dotted for the Reds.
Might throw a wrench in the works.
So go Villa. Go Leicester. Go Palace. Go West Brom (If Samaras did indeed sign. CELTIC!)
Burnley needs all the help they can get, though I like Swansea. And as a Liverpool supporter, I'm never sorry to see everton lose.
Go Hull, go Spurs, + go Sunderland.
Which reminds me to set the DVR for Celtic and all the BPL games I'll be asleep during coming up in about 5 hours.
I bid you goodnite.
and Alberto Balsam is awesome. Forgot about that track.

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Just chillin' like Garret Quillin.

i loved the way wenger scoffed @ signing balotelli when he was doing punditry for the world cup. i like arsene plenty.... but i hope to god CL qualification is the last hurdle towards making moves for a DM/striker cuz arteta and giroud are great for your 4th place trophy, but beyond that you need some "steel in the midfield" (read: arsenal fans want a big black guy to be the next vieira! cavarlho come on down! =) and well, as i've covered 15 times on here, you need a striker better than giroud to contend for the prem.

good move for the scouse with balo cuz he's 24, and well, of course while the YNWA faithful are all like "look at how brilliant we are to get a potnetially world class 24 year old talent at striker for 16mil" there have to be warning signs going off in your head when ac milan is coming off of its most god-awful-season in recent history and they're selling their #1 striker for 16mil. shit arsenal could almost get that much for giroud.... and well, idk if cavani is a significant upgrade but if they throw 30-45mil or 30mil+giroud at him i mena.... just th recognition that you need to upgrade giroud is enough for me.

just plz for the love of god dont blow it @home against besitkas. ramsey's inevitably gonna miss 1/3 of the season anwyays so consider wednesday practice. hopefully my guy the bumslayer ozil steps up cuz good lord arsenal needs a selfless guy up front in the attack. and santi cazorla on the left wing is killing me, smalls!

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Sounds awesome!

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"That's what the internet is for. Slandering others anonymously." Banky
“Been that way since one monkey looked at the sun and told the other monkey ‘He said for you to give me your fuckin’ share.’”

Thank goodness I never picked up the gambling bug, be it sports, casinos, or lottery.
None of today's results were what I was hoping for.

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Just chillin' like Garret Quillin.

Today's results were a little more favorable, as far as my soccer picks.

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Just chillin' like Garret Quillin.

How are we doing with this? I enjoy it when I put it on, but I haven't been able to forge any sort of emotional connection with it like I have with genre touchstone Music Has The Right To Children or Kiln's Dusker. It could be that those emotional connections require lots of hours of walking around with your headphones on until it's the soundtrack to your life at a pivotal moment. It could also be that downtempo will always be my first electronic love and IDM just doesn't connect with me the same way.

"4" is a beautiful song, so it's not as if it's impossible.

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