I will trade you Kenny straight up
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| Meanwhile, in The Bronx https://mail.chicagofanatics.com/viewtopic.php?f=92&t=65259 |
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| Author: | stoneroses86 [ Thu Dec 08, 2011 4:33 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Meanwhile, in The Bronx |
http://espn.go.com/espn/page2/index?id=7319439 Typically, a general manager of a baseball club signs new ballplayers because he believes that the new ballplayer will help to improve the club. This is generally beneficial to both the club AND the ballplayer, as the club increases its chance of winning, and the general manager increases his job security. If, however, a club has a general manager who is a complete buffoon (and/or an out-and-out double agent for the club's enemies), that general manager might choose to spend this crucial time of the year AGAIN preparing to dress up in the costume of an elf and getting ready to rappel down the side of a building in Connecticut with his friends Santa Claus and The Grinch. He might even spend this valuable time joking around with the manager of his club's most hated enemy, asking him to join the madness! Do not waste any of your precious time on this earth trying to figure out how these insane acts benefit the elf's employer. They do not, in any way, do so. A far more legitimate question to ponder is: Why does the elf's employer allow the elf to get away with this? I imagine this exchange in The Bronx: Employer: "How is it coming on your efforts to improve a team that LOST TO THE DETROIT TIGERS IN THE FIRST ROUND OF THE PLAYOFFS?" Evil, Villainous, Satanic Elf: "How should I know, I am getting ready for my annual insane act of rappelling down a building while I am dressed like an elf. It makes so many people happy." Do you want to know who is happy about this? Real General Managers, mostly in the American League East, that is who. General Managers who actually take their job seriously. General Managers who want their clubs to win. General Managers who cannot wait to fleece a nitwit. This act has caused me to have the exact opposite emotion of Christmas spirit. I am getting very close to embracing the Dark Satan. I am at my wits end. |
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| Author: | Terry's Peeps [ Thu Dec 08, 2011 4:42 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Meanwhile, in The Bronx |
...Jon Snow is entertaining King Stannis and Lady Melisandre... |
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| Author: | Hank Scorpio [ Thu Dec 08, 2011 4:43 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Meanwhile, in The Bronx |
Terry's Peeps wrote: ...Jon Snow is entertaining King Stannis and Lady Melisandre... I hope he used butter. |
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| Author: | mcbrides [ Thu Dec 08, 2011 4:49 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Meanwhile, in The Bronx |
I will trade you Kenny straight up
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| Author: | stoneroses86 [ Thu Dec 08, 2011 4:55 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Meanwhile, in The Bronx |
mcbrides wrote: I will trade you Kenny straight up Do your juicy steaks come from cows that are force-fed narcotics? This is the most insane post of the day. |
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| Author: | stoneroses86 [ Thu Dec 08, 2011 5:01 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Meanwhile, in The Bronx |
stoneroses86 wrote: mcbrides wrote: I will trade you Kenny straight up Do your juicy steaks come from cows that are force-fed narcotics? This is the most insane post of the day. As an aside, I do not have any idea who Jon Snow, King Stannis or Lady Melisandre are. Therefore, these posts mildly annoy me. immessedup17 wrote: Meanwhile...Back at the Wall... Terry's Peeps wrote: ...Jon Snow is entertaining King Stannis and Lady Melisandre...
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| Author: | Telegram Sam [ Thu Dec 08, 2011 5:02 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Meanwhile, in The Bronx |
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| Author: | Baby McNown [ Thu Dec 08, 2011 5:36 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Meanwhile, in The Bronx |
Tell you what. You can have Hendry. |
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| Author: | stoneroses86 [ Fri Dec 09, 2011 2:32 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Meanwhile, in The Bronx |
The elf pictured above has just re-signed Social Security recipient Freddie Garcia. In other news, the elf pictured above still manages to retain his job. Here is a list of the prized free agents this offseason: 1. Albert Pujols 2. Prince Fielder ... 125. A bag of balls ... 288. Freddie Garcia |
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| Author: | rogers park bryan [ Fri Dec 09, 2011 2:54 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Meanwhile, in The Bronx |
DALLAS — Yankees GM Brian Cashman declined to fire back at Bobby Valentine after the Red Sox manager playfully said on Wednesday that he hates the Yankees. “No, I don’t hate the Red Sox; hate’s a strong word,” Cashman said. “I don’t hate Bobby. What’s that Nike thing? Haters equal motivators?” 
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| Author: | stoneroses86 [ Fri Dec 09, 2011 3:21 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Meanwhile, in The Bronx |
rogers park bryan wrote: DALLAS — Yankees GM Brian Cashman declined to fire back at Bobby Valentine after the Red Sox manager playfully said on Wednesday that he hates the Yankees. “No, I don’t hate the Red Sox; hate’s a strong word,” Cashman said. “I don’t hate Bobby. What’s that Nike thing? Haters equal motivators?” I have news for you, you rat bastard, low-life son of a bitch. There are an awful lot of people who hate the Boston Red Sox. Many of them love the club YOU STILL, BY THE STRANGE WILL OF GOD, WORK FOR. For example, me. I have always hated the Boston Red Sox. I hated the Boston Red Sox even when they were pathetic losers. Why did I hate the Boston Red Sox when they were pathetic losers who were no more a threat to The Glorious New York Yankees than a pesky mosquito on the leathery skin of a rhinoceros? BECAUSE OF THE PEOPLE WHO ARE FANS OF THE BOSTON RED SOX! I dare any of you to grow up in New England around these people and not hate the Boston Red Sox! And this was in southern Connecticut, where I could practically throw a rock into Long Island Sound. This was over one hundred (100) miles from Boston, several layers of insanity removed from the epicenter of the nutso, psychopathic earthquake! Can you just imagine what it must be like to be in close proximity to these people for the entire length of a ballgame? Can you imagine attending school, year after year after year after year after year after year with these people? Could you retain your sanity when all around you have lost theirs? Well, I did, and here I am. I am like a miraculous person who stared at Medusa and did not turn to stone. YOU LOST TO THE DETROIT TIGERS IN THE FIRST ROUND AND YOU GIVE ME FREDDIE GARCIA! Praise Christ in this most blessed and wonderful of seasons. |
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