Well, barring any prior arrests, you can hang out in a van near an elementary school. I wouldn't advise it, but you can.

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-- source

BRENT MUSBURGER MADE JEN STERGER. HE TAUGHT HER HOW TO HOTTIE UP THAT PIC.

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And there's celebrating the unique suffering of the noble...professional basketball coach! To loathe your well-compensated gym teacher gig, God, that's so coachy, that's so NBA, that's so...right. If only you could sit and learn from them about what a tough life it is to stay in five-star hotels and yell at guys. If only.

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Misery of nba coaches ehh? Expect nba coach schtooping stories in your future. Who was the assistant that was making time with the transvestite again?

I suppose I should say why isn't it socially acceptable for me to do so?

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There was this one time in 2004 that Rick Carlisle had to run a shootaround for a Pacers game on the road in Sacramento, and he was like "Foster, make your shots," and Jeff Foster was like "can't, I suck" and Carlisle was like "OH LORD JESUS WHY MUST THIS BE MY LOT IN LIFE? MY CROSS TO BEAR? MY CURSÈD ALBATROSS?" and then he went out to a nice steakhouse and coached the game and the Pacers won. And if you look outside Gate E at the Arco Arena, the boulder Rick Carlisle dragged by his neck from the Four Seasons lobby to the arena is still there to this day.

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"Hey guys I had to put up all these weird-ass SEC fanbases coming to Mizzou and uncharacteristically obsessing over the fortunes of the entire conference, and what do you guys think about the greater sociological ramifications of pan-Southern solidarity as manifested through college sports?"

"oh my god why do you even care"

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yeah, ever since 9/11 when people started getting all sensitive about these things

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

I have no doubt that Dan's source inside Halas is actually one of the Mc Caskeys.

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

These are quickly becoming my favorite calls. Pander to every B&B talking point and no pat on the back is given.

Here's what the guys have planned this Tuesday afternoon:

*2P: CollegeFootballNews.com/FOXSports.com's Pete Fiutak
BCS Champion Alabama: A College Football Dynasty in the Making?

*3:30P: "The Second Half"

*4P: The Game SportsRadio Atlanta's Jason Goff (!)
A First Look at the SEA/ATL NFC Divisional Playoff Sunday-Noon on 670 The SCORE via Dial Global Radio

*5P: The SCORE's Senior Bears/NFL Analyst/PFW/Dial Global Radio Network's Hub Arkush
Bears' Coaching Search Update; Works GB/SF NFC Divisional Playoff w/Kevin Harlan & Dan Fouts on Dial Global Radio-7P Saturday Night on 670 The SCORE

"Scoreboard Updates": Adam Harris (!!)

Terry's "two favorite words" Laurence Holmes is off tonight. The guys are done at 6P this eve for DePaul/UCONN NCAA Basketball from Storrs, CT. Back at the SCORE Studios downtown, Joe Ostrowski follows DePaul hoops, win or lose, and will do the heavy lifting until Midnight tonight when Adam & Les Grobstein have "SCORE Overnight" until 5A Wednesday morning.

Dude, Steven Berger woulda kicked your sorry ass if you made it to the finals of the Score Search. I'm just sayin.... #Rosemont.

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You can all stop clutching your pearls fellas, noted feminist Harry Carey once cat called girls over the airwaves.

Today I learned that it's acceptable to respect women less if we deem them be in a position less worthy of that respect.

And to this emailer, it's entirely possible that Brent and his producers could have chosen not to do stupid shit like this.

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...while calling a radio station that has literally sponsored the Chicago Bears coaching search.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

How is it disrespectful to judge someone based on looks? If it is, we all disrespect everyone we meet.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

That's not exactly what I or Dan was saying though. He appears to be arguing that since she put herself in a position be judged in beauty pagents that that necessarily makes it acceptable to scrutinze her wherever she goes. It's not that far removed from the argument that women who wear makeup and dress nice should always be flattered by unsolcited comments about their looks.

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This is stupid. She's a beauty queen. She wants people to say she is beautiful. That is the whole point.

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Reality is your friend, not your enemy. -- Seacrest

The NBA is the best because they're such tortured souls.

Tortured souls.

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Bernstein can be such a condescending douche. He has this Pete whatever guy on and says, "I can see why Te'o was on your ballot. It's all about the narrative." Translation: He wasn't on my ballot, because I'm smart enough to see through the ESPN feel good bullshit. Too bad you're not.

I'm glad he also took to Twitter to educate the morons that were up in arms about the Singletary interview. If only I was as smart as Dan!

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"Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public." ~ H.L. Mencken

i'd say it's a slippery slope, but it's actually quite sticky.

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Wait, what does AJ McCarron's girlfriend do again Dan? I have a stupid so I keep forgot.

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Did he really say that?

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The Bulls haven't done anything wrong, and they're not going to do anything wrong.

Yep. NBA coaches are tortured souls. Jeff Van Gundy would complain about his team's shooting to anonymous waitresses. Pat Riley hid in a Boston Garden storeroom to escape the crushing misery of coaching the '80s Lakers (but couldn't escape a roving Terry Boers). Tortured souls, all.

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Yowza, bad show today. They're the ones focusing too much on Musberger comments.

The irony lost on Dan is that nothing Musburger said was as objectifying as "she's a walking talking sex object."

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nor is it as eminently autotune-able

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I listened today from 1 to about 2:30pm.....BAD.


They are one lame Lance Briggs interview away from being Bears All Access.

The whole show is them doing this weird 'Company Man' schtick where they are totally/100% bending over backwards to protect/apologize/run cover/fellate Phil Emery. Deflecting any criticisms, lashing out etc....strange. This is ALS Activity that they have slammed people for (and continue to slam) partaking in with Jordan and any other Super Duper Star.

1.)Dan has no "Guy", I think that's obvious. What he may well have is someone who is prompting him. It is a new regime and they are the Score and they will need to play by the rules.

2.)Listening to them talk about a BCS national championship game that they didn't watch all of was uncomfortable radio, it was worse when they started in on Teo who they probably have seen play about 5 snaps before this game. "He was blocked", "They ran the ball and then threw it far down the field to a receiver." That really isn't groundbreaking stuff.

Additionally if this show could forever cease talking about women that would be just fine. No easier way to get me to feel icky then listen to Dan lust over the "obtainability" of the women in the boner pill commercials.

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Fare you well, fare you well
I love you more than words can tell
Listen to the river sing sweet songs
To rock my soul