Biggie.....now you gotta give that one up. Especially if it involves death.

#1 has no death, but due to a large settlement. (I saw a copy of the check) the legal ramifications of posting it could very costly if ever found out.

#12

Large local university selling some land. It was a really premiere site, almost a no lose deal.

Market value was about $14 mill for the land, offers came in above the $14 M mark as I knew the selling broker pretty well from our early days of real estate. So he at least told me to be North of $15 if you want a shot.

I tell the Bossman, who says he is connected to the University due to a $500K contribution he made 5 years ago, so he draws up a $11 mill offer. He sends it in and waits for the response. No response. My guy calls me and tells me, we aren't in the running (No kidding)

I tell Bossman, who flips out and calls the President of the University and starts screaming at the guy on the phone.

The president explains to Bossman that everyone that bid had made a contribution of some sort over the past 5 years.

So Bossman sues the school for some sort of bribe taking (I wasnt paying attention at this point) in order to sell the land. He claims he was forced to make a $500K donation to be in the bidding.

Fact is he made the contribution 5 years prior to the land even coming on the market and yes, the case was thrown out.

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"That's what the internet is for. Slandering others anonymously." Banky
“Been that way since one monkey looked at the sun and told the other monkey ‘He said for you to give me your fuckin’ share.’”

N/A

Him and the wife would split the bill when they went for dinner or lunch.

Always thought it was really weird.

Then they would both expense it as a business meal because they are both employees.

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"That's what the internet is for. Slandering others anonymously." Banky
“Been that way since one monkey looked at the sun and told the other monkey ‘He said for you to give me your fuckin’ share.’”

ok seriously, this guy sounds like my ex bosses big daddy. 13 months sounds like an eternity with a guy like this. just shows how professional you really are (which is what i told my boss during our squabble. i said he didnt know there was issues for months because i am a professional, and it was something he could learn himself).

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the world will always the world. your entire existence is defined by your response.

BigFan
For a young man,you have seen more than your share of assholes. So why did you start this message board and attract about 100 more?

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favrefan said:"Chris Coghlan isn't gonna pay your rent, Jimmy."

You know, you can tell a story without really telling the story.

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Long story short. Took over as food and beverage /resturaunt manager at a well known Country Club in central Ill. Everyone was pissed because only two years earlier I was the bus boy that made them money while they fucked off. New GM comes in makes me his assistant clubhouse manager and all the sudden I an the boss. Suit and tie. Everyone that I worked with in the past now I was their boss.They hated it until they understood I knew I would not sell them out. They worked harder for me than anyone ever because I always had their back unless they did not do their job.

Ding Ding!

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Early in my illustrious career...big firm...I worked a 24 hour day to finish a project for filing including overseeing the creation of a document by the overnight staff...partner left at around 8 pm (she always stayed until after 6 because the firm paid for dinner if you stayed that late)...she came back in around 8 am as I was finishing up. This needed to be filed in the suburbs and had to be delivered by one of us...she tells me to drive out and deliver it (I expected to as I was junior to her), then take a shower and come back in for the rest of the day...happened twice in my first year

Now, I was there only to get training and connections on someone else's dime because I already knew I wasn't taking the internal career path to partnership. You would think this partner would know it as well as it couldn't have been more obvious. However, she kept dangling the partner thing in front of me as some incentive to get me to pull those hours. Meanwhile there were two other poor slobs senior to me who she (yeah, she, so imagine that environment) was doing the same thing who were no closer to actually making partner than me. I always just laughed when she brought it up and considered it the equivalent of a doctor's resident days.

Getting back to this woman being cheap, there was a guy junior to me. He was making nice money, as we all were. She, however, was making real money as a partner. They took a cab together to a business meeting. She made him pay for the cab.

I had made a few connections with senior people before joining the firm so I was never in a position where this partner had control over my future at the place. I don't think she knew this. A few months into the job, one senior partner called me into his office. Being called to this floor of offices was kind of big thing if you were in the asskisser class of employees at the place. I loved the look on her face when I casually said, "yeah, I'm going upstairs to talk with X for little while". The look on her face was like Patrick Bateman when he saw a better business card. Meanwhile, the first thing this guy wanted to talk about is what an asskisser she was.

Good times.

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

You guys read the other stories?

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Not a bad boss story but a bad interview story.

I'm interviewing for a tech company in Downers Grove. First interview with the service manager went really well. Loved my transcripts, loved my history... took me into the lab and asked me to diagnose a piece of equipment and I had it locked down and repaired in 15 minutes and he said he was happy and impressed. I just need to meet the owner.

So I'm meeting with him, and he says "well, your salary requirements are a little high, but maybe there's something we can do..." puts his one leg up on the credenza behind him and basically spreads his legs and says "so... how bad do you want to work here?"

I said "I've got some other offers on the table, actually."

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

You should have added, "And they're all better looking than you."

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Wait until May. I'll have a few stories about people here...

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Old district manager lives in Houston. About 2 years ago, the furnace in our warehouse went out. It was Thursday night/Friday morning in the middle of winter. The upcoming weekend was forecast to have hi's in the teens, lows near zero.

Had our regular company come out and inspect it to find out that the motor was bad. Two options; if possible, since this furnace was probably from the late 70's, rebuild the motor at a cost of about $800. But they wouldn't know until they actually got the motor into the shop, took it apart to see what was wrong with it if if #1 could even be rebuilt, or #2 if we could even get parts for something that old. Second option was getting a new furnace installed, that day, for about $1800.

Called my boss, told him what was up, and said that we have to go with a new furnace. He hit the roof, was livid at having to spend that much. Said we would have to wait until Monday to find cheap alternative. I told him this was something that had to be done today or else the pipes for our sprinklers etc would freeze, burst, and destroy most of/all of our product.

Didn't get the OK until 3pm Friday, had to sit here until almost 7pm that night so the job could be finished. Stupid asshole...

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Sounds terrible. A hole 4 hours you had to wait. How did you do it?

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"That's what the internet is for. Slandering others anonymously." Banky
“Been that way since one monkey looked at the sun and told the other monkey ‘He said for you to give me your fuckin’ share.’”

#44

Employee has a stroke after Boss finished yelling at him on the phone towards the end of the day. Not sure on the exact time 3:30 to 4:30. The guy was out in the field and he called 911 from his phone.

Next day we find out about it, Boss needs phone records to determine if the guy had the stroke on company time.

Not sure how it turned out, as I left before the conclusion, but he was doing everything possible to make sure no worker comp type of scenario existed.

I was just wondering if the guy was alive. Guess he did live and doesn't function well, last I heard, he was in a lawsuit with the ex boss.

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"That's what the internet is for. Slandering others anonymously." Banky
“Been that way since one monkey looked at the sun and told the other monkey ‘He said for you to give me your fuckin’ share.’”

why do you care if he survived? there is no way he could have been performing at his optimal level if he was having a stroke. hopefully the boss fired him for that and maybe next time the boss should do dna gene tests to ensure all of his robots perform to their full potential.

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the world will always the world. your entire existence is defined by your response.

By playing an online game where I had to get a golfball into the whole.

I called him at 7:15am, and we close at 5pm.
Of course, I guess I could have just not told my #1 story, but said it was something really bad or whatever lame excuse not to post it, as you did.

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#43

Buys 40,000 Sf office building. Building was 99% leased, kicking off about $400K a year in net income.

Day after closing he makes the following changes,

-Lower wattage light bulbs in commom areas
-Heat turns on 30 minutes later and goes off 30 minutes earlier, same for AC
-Parking lot lights on at 4:00PM off at 8PM, Police calls many times asking for lights as became place for illegal stuff.
-Cheapest toilet paper and towels he could find
-Fake plants, no more watering charges
-Close bathroom on Floors 1 and 3 for men. They can use floor 2
-Cleaning crew fired, one cleaning lady M,W,F (Yes, against leases)

Within 6 months everyone moves out and he is left with empty office building. To this day, empty.

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"That's what the internet is for. Slandering others anonymously." Banky
“Been that way since one monkey looked at the sun and told the other monkey ‘He said for you to give me your fuckin’ share.’”

Ten years ago I'm doing consulting for the big drugstore chain. Working with their vendor to negotiate contracts, reduce costs and purchase equipment for their 550 new locations each year.

The director at big drugstore and I hit it off pretty well. I'm bringing in new processes and ideas that are making him look like a genius, while saving them seven figures annually. Also, I'm taking all the shit from internal folks there, and in Danville, where the processes are saving the accounting folks money, but may end up reducing bean counters eventually.

Their vendor applied for and received government grants before I worked with them. The grants explicitly stated that the monies must b used on equipment, and not the day to day operations of the vendors business. Well... they used the money on things other than the equipment, and one day the state shows up to audit the books. They can't account for the money as the grant demanded. Problem was the money from the state of IL for the equipment, came from a federal grant. Now the feds are involved.

Sitting at my desk doing my thing, and the FBI walks in. The secretary calls the owner and tells her to point them my way. Only thing you ever want to say to the feds. “Am I a witness, a subject or a target?” Nothing more needs to be said. They have to answer the question, and if they don’t, then your response is the same, nothing. Not a word. Hand them a card for you attorney and try not to soil yourself.

The feds finally get to the owner and he decides to try and dummy up receipts to cover his ass. VERY BAD IDEA. Say nothing, but if they catch you lying, they will make your life a living hell.

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You have to witness, subject, and target the following: Rosie O'Donnell, Geena Davis, and Maya Angelou. GO!

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-- source

Four months later I have extricated big drug guys from his vendor, and after contracts have been signed with new vendors, we are going over the cost reductions that had been made previously and others that were shelved due to the FBI involvement.

We get all done and I figure our relationship has reached its end. I was offered another gig by a vendor of theirs and was ready to move on. This guy offers me a contract working for their department for two years. I’m mildly surprised by the unexpected offer. Until he added a catch. He asks me to change the figures and fees that will be supplied to the new vendors. You see they get a percentage of what they will save big drug guys and he is afraid that he will look bad, or worse, lose his job if they are able to find the savings that were never implemented. I stand up in his office and start speaking toward the speaker in the ceiling. “I know the FBI has been in your office twice in the last six months. Who thought that this was a good idea?”

He never thought that I would actually turn him down. I pick up the paperwork he offered with the contract and I leave. By the end of the day the other vendor has withdrawn his offer, and my six figure consulting gig is over.

Today he is a corporate VP at the company.

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So I'm on this archealogical dig in Nova Scotia, and I come across this really nice mandible section. This thing is tits- still has a molars and an incisor, nice pronounced mental proturbence, the works. I'm stooped over cleaning this fucker up with my brushes and shit and somebody comes up behind me and pokes the back of my knee with the flat part of a pickaxe. I fall forward and break this fucking thing into three pieces and this son of a bitch just laughs and laughs. Fucking Bruce Springsteen.

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I don't remember half the time if I'm hiding or I'm lost

Did you get the job?

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Good people drink good beer - Hunter S. Thompson

<º)))><

Waiting for the time when I can finally say
That this has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way