Paul Coffey was Bobby Orr. Orr obviously was that first type but he may be a bit over loved.

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Elections have consequences.

You're absolutely right, and that's what I find funny about DFW's unrelenting Agassi-hate (well, I guess it relented now ): he shits on Agassi's silly outfits and flat-affect game, but when I was into watching tennis from 1999-2003 (my failed attempts at playing tennis were so utterly soul-crushing that I couldn't even bear to watch another Slam for five or six years), I could tell it was Sampras who was "ruining the game" by being too perfect and too dominant, and so I rooted against him every time (and the Williamses on the other side, who back then were even more given to insufferable petulance when bested). Wallace, however, goes pretty easy on Sampras when the topic comes up, either in the piece on Montreal and Michael Joyce or the outright hagiography of Federer.

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i agree about safin. djokovic did some goofball things in his early career, like his sharapova impersonation. that was one thing i loved about roddick. he just never developed a complete game.

you're right about the "say the right thing" with them; i think that's true with a lot of athletes these days. it seems like everybody saves their "true" thoughts for twitter, and just come off as idiots. but i think it's just because i've followed murray since '06 and watched him grow as a player that i've grown to like him. plus i want to see a british person to win wimbledon. and i think it'd be a nice story to counter something horrible like dunblane that he went through.

Tennis is more boring now. A lot of sport has become boring due to equipment. I fully agree though on somehow hating players who were to great or too perfect aka Sampras or Tiger. I have to disagree though on the Williams sisters. I like them now I suppose but I hated them bad and wanted them to get smashed every time out. This had nothing to do with their playing really. I do not like generally when players of anything are super hyped when young and never yet did anything like these two. Mostly, though I wanted them to lose because their Dad was a giant dick.

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Elections have consequences.

maybe he had something personal against agassi, i don't know. i'm familiar with wallace but only his major works like "infinite jest".

yeah, the williams sisters...well, for me, very hard to root for. serena moreso than venus. but they both are great players.

i'd love to see tennis gain steam again because it is a great sport to watch, and i miss the days when it mattered here. just like heavyweight boxing. but that will never come back...

My problem with the Williams sisters is that the women's tour is just completely unwatchable these days. Take all of my complaints about the men's game, amplify them x 100, and add in a ridiculously shallow field filled with headcases and you have my basic view of the era they've dominated. Beyond this, the people who have come close to challenging them haven't really been likable. I loved watching Henin's game far more than anyone else in that time frame, but it was really hard to root for her when she would behave nearly as badly as Serena.

They dont make them like Richie Tenenbaum anymore

yeah...and very few hotties.

He'd probably be the closest thing, but what Orr did when he did it was unmatched.

You know, my biggest problem with the so called statistical revolution that began with baseball is that context is easily lost. Now, people look at the various References and use the numbers to beat each other over the head.

For example, it's become a popular viewpoint that Joe Namath was "just a guy". That's so wrong, it's hard to explain. He was a major reason the two leagues merged. And then he quickly legitimized the upstarts. Whenever an Old League merges with a new one, it's because they are afraid. And that fear comes from the talent. Dr. J was a major force behind the ABA/NBA merger. That's how good he was.

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

You are right. I don't mind the numbers but they miss a lot. Namath as you mention or if you simply look at numbers you would say Bradshaw sucked. Or was Podsednik not essential in '05? If you look at numbers Daryl Dawkins was just a guy too.

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Elections have consequences.

stats people don't like the word "intangible". clutch, choke, etc. they think it's immaterial. anyone who has competed in their life knows that there is totally such a thing as that. and namath had it. he was a prolific player, and so was bradshaw. the guys knew how to win.

it's not always what the numbers are, it's when you put them up.

I agreed with every single thing said in that column.

If that also makes me an "elitist asshole" , I'll wear the label with pride.

the day you catch me drunk among more idiot drunken fools, shouting yeahh.... (insert name of sport team here) while listening to incredibly boring and idiotic "speeches", etc

is the day you'll know some alien has taken over my body.

because that's EXACTLY what it is.

to Bernstein, to myself and to everyone who is NOT a hockey player in that league.

Bernstein was right about that one too.

I learned that lesson the hard way while young, paying preposterous prices for seeing the Bears get smoked by the Niners in 40 degrees below zero in "Bear weather".

or watching Jordan's Bulls lose to the Suns in what I had hoped would be the elimination game, from distant seats... (best I could afford

now.. the sporting events I CHOOSE to watch.. are watched in "bogey weather" on a comfortable sofa.. no crowds.. insane prices.. stupid idiots to deal with.

that Bernstein is a smart dude

So, which producer is bogey666?

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The Bulls haven't done anything wrong, and they're not going to do anything wrong.

None of them. English is bogey's second language. You can tell by how he/she writes.

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

Bogey brings up fantastic points. Why go to Cedar Point? I can just sit on my couch with no lines, sweaty weather, or overpriced snacks and just watch a host go on a roller coaster.

Shit, I've sightseen all the Caribbean and Europe with all the Travel Channel I've watched. Oh and you wouldn't believe all the world-class restaurants I've been too.

My analogies don't work 100% but point is its an experience. To each his own, pudwhack.

Congratulations, you're a big fan!

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

yes. English is my "2nd" language. I don't speak it like the Sox/Hawks fan Bernstein is so fond of imitating. Today's was one of his best yet.

and I can't be a producer, because I recognize the difference between adverbs and adjectives... so I never played good.. and I never did things different... etc.. etc. etc I don't take things personal..

I agree it's an experience (although for me it grew "old" fast) to each their own.

but I don't do "groups", especially large groups. I'm an avid traveler and have traveled the world over, but never ever nor will I ever do so in a "tour group" for e.g.

if someone likes to get drunk and scream.. yeah.. (insert name your sports team here) along with similarly minded people, that's certainly their prerogative.

You made my point for me. It's not about whether any of us agree with being with idiot drunk fans in humid heat to wait for a parade to whiz by. I agree with why that doesn't sound fun. But - to each his own. Don't fucking tell people they are "celebrating" wrong. If Dan wants to sit on his couch and barely move a muscle to celebrate that's fine wih me. Don't write a column telling people how the fuck to enjoy their team and championship properly... And then even if you do that, offer no solutions. That, is what is wrong with that column and that is what makes him an asshole. He's judgmental because it doesn't fit his line of thinking. Some of you are missing the point. It's not about agreeing or disagreeing with his thoughts on the parade in general- it's the judgment he casts upon fans.

Let's not lose sight of the fact that he'd be moving plenty of muscles if the Bulls/Sox/Bears won. This whole tut-tutting is more about the Hawks than anything.

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His biggest celebration will be reserved for the Cubs if they ever win it. You can't believe everything these goons say on the radio.

I heard Rozner the other day say that as an objective journalist he wouldn't wear a Hawks cap. But he's a Hawks fan. He can deny it all he wants but he knows what's in his heart. I think that's what people misunderstood about me saying that fans go to games. If you care about something to the point where you call yourself a fan, I think you immerse yourself in it beyond flipping a TV switch. Barry's a Hawks fan. He can pretend he isn't but that doesn't change it. And I don't ask for a journalist (I'm not even 100 percent sure what that is these days) to be completely unbiased. Just write as if you are. Yeah, there's no rooting in the pressbox, but that doesn't mean a guy who grew up with a team can't feel joyful inside.

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

He has taken off one of his shoes, and I think he might be crying.

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Good people drink good beer - Hunter S. Thompson

<º)))><

Waiting for the time when I can finally say
That this has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way

he said a few times that the bulls parades/rallys were dumb too... he should stick with critiquing local sports media clothing.

I dunno. Anything that vindicates Theo will make Dan happy, but he reeeeeeeally hates Cubs fans. I imagine he'd extrude some 500-word dumpster fire washing the Ricketts' balls and celebratring the triumph of numbers over meatballs, but we'd also get a lot of the same "oh my gosh it's just the Cubs will you idiots shut up already" that we've been hearing for the last few weeks.

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The Bulls haven't done anything wrong, and they're not going to do anything wrong.

And before you criticize me for mixing my metaphors, stop for a minute and picture Dan literally shitting a flaming dumpster. You're welcome.

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The Bulls haven't done anything wrong, and they're not going to do anything wrong.

Yeah, he hates fans in general. But I think his take, if it ever HAPPENS, is going to be somewhat maudlin, "they waited so long, it's nice, it's nice".

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

Anyone who doesnt tip the cap to Cubs fans after they win in 2015 deserves to be lit on fire.

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I will buy Cubbie Nation a coke and the world will be as one.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

I'll join the cubbie bandwagon just to piss off die hard fans.

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.