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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 2:48 pm 
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http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/09/0 ... 59634.html

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We learned a lot from a 22-year-old woman who tried to storm the field at a University of Iowa football game over the weekend.

What do you get when you're arrested at a college game, blow a .341 BAC and then tweet about it? Why, your very own commemorative T-shirt, of course.

Samantha Lynn Goudie -- Twitter alias @Vodka_Samm -- allegedly tried to jump onto the field during the Northern Illinois-Iowa game in Iowa City on Saturday. University of Iowa police collared her and gave her a breathalyzer test, on which she blew a preliminary .341.

But Goudie wasn't done. When she was released from the slammer, she took to Twitter:

(various dumb tweets)



first of all she's lucky that she didn't die, .341 is a completely insane BAC
second, to be proud of it
and finally, to the idiots following her on Twitter or encouraging her....


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 2:49 pm 
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there, to save time for those of you that are going to ask if she's hot...


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 2:55 pm 
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Any white girl in decent shape can be hot with wayfarers and a neon shirt.

I offer my DB nomination not so much to the girl but to the legions of Deadspin fucks making jokes like "she blew a .341? the most common last name in Iowa is A .341," or "next man up," or "Hey Vodka-chick, if you're reading this, I wanna party with you. And I'm in Chicago. And I'm kinda serious." And really, tons more stuff that says this girl is basically just a walking drunken fuckhole who should be drunkenly sauntering over for use any minute now, which kinda pokes holes in Gawker's posturing as Defender Of All That Is Right And Socially Holy.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 3:44 pm 
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Reasonably good looking...my bet is either in education or marketing.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 4:20 pm 
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Bagels wrote:
first of all she's lucky that she didn't die, .341 is a completely insane BAC
Mickey Mantle wrote:
pfft. Let me know when she hits .341 in the World Series with a .341 BAC.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 4:46 pm 
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Also tiresome about this is how everyone is like AWWWW SHIT DUDE 341 SHE'S FUCKING HARDCOOOORE when obviously it was either a poorly calibrated instrument or she just straight-up spit her booze into it, because people who know this stuff better than I do have agreed that it's impossible to fuck around on twitter via your smartphone with a BAC level that should have you damn near comatose.

Also, Deadspin/Gawker, for all its social justice aspirations, sees fit to make sport of a drunk girl rather than to say anything about how binge drinking is dehumanizing and gross. Everything about this story sucks.

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Last edited by Curious Hair on Tue Sep 03, 2013 4:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 4:48 pm 
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Frank Coztansa wrote:
Bagels wrote:
first of all she's lucky that she didn't die, .341 is a completely insane BAC
Mickey Mantle wrote:
pfft. Let me know when she hits .341 in the World Series with a .341 BAC.

:lol:

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 4:56 pm 
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Curious Hair wrote:
Also tiresome about this is how everyone is like AWWWW SHIT DUDE 341 SHE'S FUCKING HARDCOOOORE when obviously it was either a poorly calibrated instrument or she just straight-up spit her booze into it, because people who know this stuff better than I do have agreed that it's impossible to fuck around on twitter via your smartphone with a BAC level that should have you damn near comatose.

Also, Deadspin/Gawker, for all its social justice aspirations, sees fit to make sport of a drunk girl rather than to say anything about how binge drinking is dehumanizing and gross. Everything about this story sucks.


Agreed. And that's some pretty shitty looking vodka she's got there.

So, there's really nothing good here.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 5:04 pm 
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Curious Hair wrote:
Also, Deadspin/Gawker, for all its social justice aspirations, sees fit to make sport of a drunk girl rather than to say anything about how binge drinking is dehumanizing and gross. Everything about this story sucks.
Deadspin: Drunk girl gets drunk
Gawker: Girl arrested by cops for just doing what college kids do.
Jalopnik: Girl gets ride in sweet police cruiser
Jezebel: What evil man wanted to get her drunk? What was he doing? Why are men the devil?
i09: What is the point of this site?
Lifehacker: 6 hints on how to drink vodka and not get arrested
Kotaku: Girl arrested at football game, stay at home and avoid sports: A how to guide
Gizmodo: How to use your iPhone to avoid getting arrested like drunk Iowa girl

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 7:26 pm 
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We still need the, "You did the same stupid shit when you were in college post."

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 7:27 pm 
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conns7901 wrote:
Not over yet.
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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 7:32 pm 
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where's the "concerned parent" facebook post of "This is the sign of the times, people! The end is close! Protect your children."


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 7:42 pm 
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I realize I'm the last person on the planet to not know this, but: Explain to me the flipping the bird that all the kids do in interweb photos these days. Who are they flipping off? Me? The world? Old people who don't approve of them? I don't get it. Most of the time, the kid generally looks dumber than a monkey ass-dropping even aside from the finger gesture, or in this case like a walking drunken fuckhole as CH colorfully pointed out. So, is she flipping me off for thinking she's a walking drunken fuckhole, even though she's clearly conveying exactly that in the picture? I don't get it.


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 7:46 pm 
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Jesus help her. Obviously no one else has.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 7:49 pm 
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24_Guy wrote:
I realize I'm the last person on the planet to not know this, but: Explain to me the flipping the bird that all the kids do in interweb photos these days. Who are they flipping off? Me? The world? Old people who don't approve of them? I don't get it. Most of the time, the kid generally looks dumber than a monkey ass-dropping even aside from the finger gesture, or in this case like a walking drunken fuckhole as CH colorfully pointed out. So, is she flipping me off for thinking she's a walking drunken fuckhole, even though she's clearly conveying exactly that in the picture? I don't get it.

I blame Public Television.

Image

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 7:50 pm 
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conns7901 wrote:
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Doug - PD


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 8:19 pm 
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This photo is begging for a shop-job on that dry erase board.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 8:20 pm 
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24_Guy wrote:
I realize I'm the last person on the planet to not know this, but: Explain to me the flipping the bird that all the kids do in interweb photos these days. Who are they flipping off? Me? The world? Old people who don't approve of them? I don't get it. Most of the time, the kid generally looks dumber than a monkey ass-dropping even aside from the finger gesture, or in this case like a walking drunken fuckhole as CH colorfully pointed out. So, is she flipping me off for thinking she's a walking drunken fuckhole, even though she's clearly conveying exactly that in the picture? I don't get it.

Bigfan.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 8:23 pm 
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conns7901 wrote:
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She really should think about a push up bra or at least something with an underwire for support. She's going to regret that in 15-20 years. :roll:

:lol:

:drunken: (but nowhere near .1 much less.341)

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 8:42 pm 
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Johnny Law has a little Doug E. Fresh thing going on.

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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 10:04 pm 
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We should be encouraging drunken sluts, not shaming them.


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 03, 2013 10:28 pm 
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Curious Hair wrote:
"Hey Vodka-chick, if you're reading this, I wanna party with you. And I'm in Chicago. And I'm kinda serious."

I was pretty much joking bro


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 04, 2013 4:48 am 
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Darkside wrote:
24_Guy wrote:
I realize I'm the last person on the planet to not know this, but: Explain to me the flipping the bird that all the kids do in interweb photos these days. Who are they flipping off? Me? The world? Old people who don't approve of them? I don't get it. Most of the time, the kid generally looks dumber than a monkey ass-dropping even aside from the finger gesture, or in this case like a walking drunken fuckhole as CH colorfully pointed out. So, is she flipping me off for thinking she's a walking drunken fuckhole, even though she's clearly conveying exactly that in the picture? I don't get it.

Bigfan.

:lol: :lol:

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 04, 2013 8:03 am 
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Her tweets were pretty damn coherent for having a BAC that high.


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 04, 2013 8:12 am 
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Id very much like someone to prove that the .341 was not legit.

It bothers me that this girl is getting props for this (even if it is misguided college students)


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 04, 2013 8:14 am 
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I would think a .341 would merit an immediate trip to the ER.

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 04, 2013 8:17 am 
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As someone said it was likely a reading too quickly after drinking. A cop or whatever must wait min 20 mins to allow flash alcohol to be out of your mouth before test.

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PostPosted: Wed Sep 04, 2013 8:17 am 
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Hatchetman wrote:
I would think a .341 would merit an immediate trip to the ER.

Yeah, they say .35 you can stop breathing.

Certainly wouldnt be tweeting with perfect grammar.

I just want someone to specifically come out and prove this dumb girl wrong


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 04, 2013 8:20 am 
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Yeah, I don't believe it. I'm unable to use my thumbs correctly after three wine spritzers.


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 04, 2013 8:46 am 
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doug-ep becomes The Village People!

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