I have never seen a Woody Allen movie. The previews all look like dated romantic comedies which don't pique my interest enough to spend on my limited free time.

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

I've only seen 1 Woody Allen movie.

Unless he didn't write Joe Dirt, in which I case I haven't seen any.

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You know me like that.

This is the problem when a glorified shock jock steps into the foray of an important public discussion.

We all say stupid, hypocritical crap every day. Bernstein is no exception. It's even worse because he's an emotional drama queen. It's the nature of his role. You can't have a hard line opinion on everything and not be hypocritical a lot of the time. And that's fine when we're talking about playing football in domes or Bear weather or big black studs.

However, when he ventures into real.important.radio (TM) he looks like a hypocritical buffoon on a subject that is actually important. You can't say to napalm an entire state because of a scandal at one school and not expect to look like an extreme hypocrite with a simplistic perspective. It truly is a shame when we're talking about such an important topic that Bernstein chooses to make it about himself through hyperbole, shouting, and ridiculous generalizations without realizing that, statistically speaking, he is likely to be a member of any number of groups he wants to set on fire.

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I always enjoy a good point out why The Stain is a hypocrite post . Now let's go get a fucking snack leash.

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Proud member of the white guy grievance committee

It aint the six minutes. Its what happens in those six minutes.

Myron and Phil's is closed.

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Love and Death, Annie Hall, Take the Money and Run, What's Up Tigerlily?, Manhattan, Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex..., all great. So are Rosemary's Baby and Chinatown, for that matter. I guess I'm going to hell.

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One must yell to be heard over Fritzy.

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

Boy, I’ve Really Put You In A Tough Spot, Haven’t I?
COMMENTARY • Opinion • Celebrities • ISSUE 50•02 • Jan 14, 2014
By Woody Allen



As those who have followed the uproar surrounding my lifetime achievement award at this year’s Golden Globes are aware, my name has again become the source of controversy. Once more, the media, the general public, and my own family members have called into question the propriety of continuing to honor and lavish praise upon an individual—myself, legendary film director Woody Allen—who has been accused of committing crimes of the most deplorable nature. Addressing this highly contentious matter would require you to delve into the following ethical quandary: Do you continue to support me as a filmmaker, writer, and human being who has technically not been convicted of any crime, or do you henceforth cease your admiration of me and my work due to the admittedly pretty damn compelling evidence that I molested at least one young child?

I mean, wow, I’ve really put you guys in a pretty tight spot here, haven’t I? Can’t say I envy you people one bit; this one’s a real doozy.

Gosh, just thinking about the moral ramifications of this situation is enough to make one’s head spin, frankly. On one hand, you have the accusations that have been leveled against me: that I am a sexual predator who molested my adopted adolescent daughter while simultaneously entering into a sexual relationship with the child of my now ex-partner that continues to this day. But on the other hand, you have my truly lovable persona and monumental contributions to cinema—as evidenced by such timeless works as Manhattan, The Purple Rose Of Cairo, and Crimes And Misdemeanors—that have delighted millions of people and unquestionably benefited society as a whole.

So, do you blindly condemn me based on unproven allegations of sexual impropriety that, even if true, shouldn't automatically diminish the import of my immense artistic contributions? Or do you maintain that the value of my work supersedes what I may or may not have done in my personal life, knowing that in doing so you are most likely siding with a pederast whom the American public has inexplicably let off the hook for a series of horrific crimes that in a just world would have seen me in handcuffs long ago?

See what I’ve done to you? See the choice I’ve forced you to make? That’s right, folks; for the rest of your lives you’ll have to weigh everything my art has meant to you personally against a series of damning, albeit not technically proven, allegations of horrific abuse, and you basically have to make that calculation every single time you watch one of my films or laugh at one of my undeniably funny jokes. Holy Moses, that has to be a real drag for you guys.

Oh, sure, you could try to defend me in an argument by saying, “Well, he was never convicted, and it’s possible that this little girl just made all that stuff up,” but, c’mon, anyone who says that is bound to sound like kind of an asshole, right? Even if your intentions are good, that line of argument does sort of make you look like you’re throwing a potential molestation victim under the bus in order to defend, at all costs, that funny, neurotic guy in the glasses who makes you laugh, doesn’t it? No, obviously you can’t do that. But then again, what are you going to do? Never watch Annie Hall again? Not to sound too conceited or anything, but you know you don’t want that.

The fact is, this isn’t a black-and-white issue. My gifts to the medium of film are unparalleled: Sleeper; Hannah And Her Sisters; and don’t forget Broadway Danny Rose, which is severely underrated! My alleged crimes are atrocious: sexual predation, molestation, pedophilia. I have produced scores of deftly funny yet poignant movies that have pushed the genre of film comedy into new and previously unexplored dimensions. On the other side of the coin, I left my longtime girlfriend for a girl 37 years my junior the same year I very likely, for all you know, digitally penetrated a 7-year-old girl. Are you about to go to bat for someone like that? Will you join a society that is willing not just to exonerate but also to celebrate a possible remorseless child molester just because he made Sweet And Lowdown?

Face it, you’re all pretty screwed on this one. Goddamn it, if only the evidence against me was just a smidgen more airtight and I wasn’t so delightful. This would be so easy for you all! I’m really sorry about that.

At the end of the day, I am just Woody Allen, the lovably neurotic New York Jew whose works have captivated audiences for more than half a century. However, I am also a man who preyed on the teenaged daughter of my lover, marrying her while tearing apart our family in the process. I also am an acclaimed writer and performer who has produced hundreds of films, plays, essays, and stand-up comedy routines that have become an inherent part of our cultural fabric and that will continue to inspire for decades to come. And yes, I also possibly, maybe, forced myself on a 7-year-old girl—my own daughter—betraying the most sacred covenant of trust and ruining her life. And I made Bananas.

Anyway, sorry I can’t doing anything more than deny the allegations against me, which does you absolutely no good whatsoever. At the end of the day, it’s up to you to decide what happened and what is right. Good luck, everyone!

Did you neglect a link to The Onion or did you write that whole thing yourself?

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I wish.

Its The Onion. I never source it when it's the Onion. At least one person will think its real.

I just ask because I don't see it up there and want to share it with people.

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the world will always the world. your entire existence is defined by your response.

The best thing about good satire is how true it rings. Can't you just imagine that very debate raging in Danny's head?

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They were having some problems due to the economy. I think they just took the insurance check and let the place sit fallow until things turn or they get an offer. Good people.

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

Agreed franky...woody is a creep n belongs in prison...I didnt know he was involved in CHinatown ..makes sense, the lead female in that was knocked up by her daddy...good flik but if i see that scumbag in a movie I turn the channel .

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Chinatown was Polanski.

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Elections have consequences.

Ah ok thanx...thought ?hair said it was allen.

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No, I was also celebrating the work of Roman Polanski while I was in the neighborhood.

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I dont even consider Allen n POlanski in the same ballpark. Every musican from the 80'S N BACK had consensual sex with 13 year old girls..polanski was just singled out for some reason.

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Polanski straight up raped that girl, her grand jury testimony is grim stuff:

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/ ... e-director

Hollywood absolutely loves Polanski.

And wasn't Jack Nicholson in that hot tub with Polanski?

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Proud member of the white guy grievance committee

It aint the six minutes. Its what happens in those six minutes.

I once watched a doco on this. Polanski fled the country because it was widely believed his Judge was going senile. They were not sure he could be trusted. I don't know how you "plead" down from rape,but Polanski had a deal in the works & the judge changed his mind.

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favrefan said:"Chris Coghlan isn't gonna pay your rent, Jimmy."

Mark is a really good guy but he was in a tough spot. His customer base was dying and anytime he started making changes to attract a younger crowd the old people that remained complained about it.

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

Committing fraud is the American way.

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Be well

GO BEARS!!!

Anyone with a Twitter account want to ask him when the movie is coming out about the sick Hollywood culture than enables a child molester? A child molester who's work he loves and Hollywood continues to honor.

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I honestly would if I wasnt 100% sure it wouldnt just result in a block.


This is something that's gotta be done over the phone or in person

If Dan would block someone because of that he's every bit as bad as the people he rails on at PSU.

He absolutely would. He's a douche.

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