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Retweeted by Crain's Chicago
https://twitter.com/ChicagosMayor

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I don't remember half the time if I'm hiding or I'm lost

He doesn't want you to comment.

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"All crowds boycotting football games shouldn't care who sings or takes a knee because they aren't watching." - Nas

Not a specific post but this girl I'm friends with is one of those "pull yourself up by your bootstraps"/"I worked hard for what I got so fuck you" posters. Bitch, your dad bought you a pony when you were a little girl and you don't hide that fact because you're constantly talking about your god damned horse. How exactly have you "pulled yourself up" to where you are?

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-- source

Am I the only one with the "5k braggers"? Congratulations on running/jogging/walking 3 miles. You don't have to talk about how excited you are to do it, and then that you are doing it, and then how awesome it was to travel on foot for 3 miles. It doesn't make you an athlete. It makes you in shape enough to do 45 minutes worth of work.

It's like all the terrible things about marathoners combined with not actually doing something even moderately impressive.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

Oh, and sometimes there is mud. Way to go! You ran with dirt on you! You should start training for the 2016 Olympics!

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

A 5K in 45 minutes is nothing more than a very brisk walk.

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Flew too close to the sun on wings of pastrami

I once saw someone with a 5K sticker on their like the ones you see with people who have ran marathons and half marathons.

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I thank bigfan and God for CSFMB every day.

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

How bout the 26.2 bumper stickers?

I mean, those are lame, but even worse the fucking 13.1. No sticker til you finish one, you self conscious half assed marathoner!

You're goddamn right. And fuck your stick figure family too!

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

I did see one a few days ago that said 0.0 I don't run. I found that one funny and most bumper stickers suck.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

I have three 13.1 stickers. Not on my car, but in a drawer at home. I'll send them your way, RPB. You can have a ceremonial sticker burning. I have no interest in earning a 26.2. I'm happy with running half marathons.

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-- source

You are what's wrong with North America

I would wish no harm but something on whoever brought up these stickers. Now, I see them everywhere, it was much better when I never knew what they were.

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2018
#ExtendLafleur
10 More Wins

Someone I went to high school with shared a video of someone poking a fetus sitting on an operating table with the title "Still Support Abortion, Anyone?"...during lunch...

Tell em they should have been aborted

Yeah. Something like "its too bad your parents didn't do something like this"

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Good people drink good beer - Hunter S. Thompson

<º)))><

Waiting for the time when I can finally say
That this has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way

Those are the worst, especially when they add their pets.

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Good people drink good beer - Hunter S. Thompson

<º)))><

Waiting for the time when I can finally say
That this has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way

All babies want to be borned! All babies want to be borned!

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Good people drink good beer - Hunter S. Thompson

<º)))><

Waiting for the time when I can finally say
That this has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way

You should affix a "63" sticker to your ride.

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Sex isn't dirty, sex isn't a crime. It's a loving act between two or more consenting adults.

-Hank Kingsley

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2018
#ExtendLafleur
10 More Wins

The other day I was doodling at the kitchen table and I wanted to aggravate my wife so I drew a character I called Fetus Pete. He was old and had a beard and wore a ten gallon hat and a t-shirt that said "I USED TO BE A FETUS". I told her he was a new mascot for the pro-life movement. He walks around like a panhandler but he just hugs people and says, "Celebrate life."

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

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Power is always in the hands of the masses of men. What oppresses the masses is their own ignorance, their own short-sighted selfishness.
- Henry George

DT wins again!

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favrefan said:"Chris Coghlan isn't gonna pay your rent, Jimmy."

Yeah the family stickers are lame. And those stickers with the little rascal pissing on some logo or team name. Only a cunty halfwitted shit-smearing fuckstain would put on that on an automobile. When I see that on a car I often wish we were in a lawless society so I could take a telescopic friction lock baton to the knees of whatever cock-eating fuckwad was behind the wheel.

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Back off, Warchild. Seriously.

_________________
Good people drink good beer - Hunter S. Thompson

<º)))><

Waiting for the time when I can finally say
That this has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way