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Paraphrasing Frank Costanza: "In 30 seconds, without rules or limitations and with no repercussions on the back end, call out somebody or something in the business."
It's always pissed me off when sponsors have some control over programming, including locations for remotes, as well as oversensitivity to content. There have been and still are some real spineless, manipulative weenies in PR offices in town. There have been several people for whom I've worked, and with whom I've worked (in programming, sales and management) for which I have no use. Resentments are unhealthy. I'm trying to let those things go. Like Marty from "True Detective" said (I think in Episode 2) "That's the kind of shit that leads to cancer." You should have asked me in early October! Sorry to puss out Frank, but I'm trying to replace "I hate" with "I can tolerate." BTW, loved your Facebook post Saturday: "If the Olympics were happening in my front yard, I'd close the blinds."
Zippy-The-Pinhead mentioned something I said or posted here awhile back, suggesting I likely won't be back at the Score beyond my current contract. "Is that still the case or was that related to your emotional state at the time?" was his question.
There are other opportunities I'm interested in pursuing. I want to write two more books, one on how Patrick's autism changed our family's lives. The other is a tell-all on Chicago sports and almost 30 years in the radio business here. It would be difficult to write either of them without taking a sabbatical (non-rehab). There also is an opportunity this summer to do some promotional work for the lodge where I musky hunt in NW Ontario. My oldest son, Van, who shares my passion for Canadian fishing, is likely in his last summer before finishing college and starting his first job and perhaps a family. The idea of spending most of the summer with him on Eagle Lake producing fishing DVDs is most appealing. I also have mentioned to Mitch (on several occasions) taking a role as "sixth man" at the Score, doing vacation relief, filling in on sick days for guys, specialty programming, etc. There likely will be other radio opportunities as well. June is a long way away, but I wouldn't be honest if I didn't admit it's been on my mind a little bit. Doing my best to stay out of the prediction business.
Zizou says the first three or four first years of MJH were "must listen" but suggests I lost "the fire and passion" around 2006. He asks: "How do you feel about the perception you've been mailing it in since you returned to the Score."
Among the things over which I am powerless is what people think. But let's back up to his MJH analysis first. The first 20 months or so (May '01 thru March '03) were among the worst of my radio career and my personal life. The show struggled mightily out of the gate and I handled that very poorly. I treated people poorly and I did a lot of self medicating. The Harry shove was on the back end of a binge with blow. I was chemically irritable and angry all the time. Perhaps that's the type of radio Zizou likes. He wouldn't be alone if that's the case. If "fire and passion" means ruthlessly cutting people with words, yelling and screaming about sports, then I'm guilty of being fire and passion bankrupt. There are other shows that accommodate those who are hateful and enjoy hearing hatred expressed.
I know what I put into the show. If the absence of unrealistic anger/shouting means "mailing it in," I'm guilty. Since returning to the Score, I also have been willing to give air time to the guys in the boyquarium. Maybe that's part of this perception. I know when to grab the wheel and assume control, but I've put enough skins on the wall to not feel the need to bogart the show. It gives me enormous satisfaction to see younger guys getting flight miles. And it adds to the show. I recognize I'm at the back end of the demo and am content to let the voices of younger guys be heard. The show's ratings would reflect this being a smart approach.
Lastly....the always delightful Score Is Doomed, who wants to know why I begged to come back, if they make me pee weekly, when I'm going to grow up and accept responsibility for my actions instead of sounding like a whiny teenager making excuses for lousy choices?
Cite the case when I blamed anybody other than ME for being an addict. I'd love to hear that. I've never pointed anything but the thumb. Sorry to disappoint, SID, but for the record, I didn't beg to come back. I had a meeting with Rod, Mitch, the HR director and my agent after I got out of treatment. They asked if I was ready to come back and I said yes. Mitch expressed his concerns and I answered his questions to their satisfaction. I am subject to random drug screenings. I get screened monthly in my continuing care program, which communicates regularly with our EAP director. I'm required to attend three meetings weekly and see my therapist every other week. It must really hurt you that I'm still standing. And prospering. And happy. I'm supposed to pray for miserable fucks like you, but I'm not that recovered yet.
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