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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 4:21 am 
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Chicago to St. Paul is 345 miles as the crow flies, the greatest distance of any series in the second round (LA-Anaheim: 27 mi, Boston-Montreal: 250 mi, NYC-Pitts: 315 mi). COULD THIS ARDUOUS JOURNEY LEAD TO INCREASED FATIGUE?

Recent History
beat them in the first round 4-1 while Mike Yeo made his puzzled face at all times: Image

10/26: Minnesota 5, Hawks 3
10/28: Hawks 5, Minnesota 1
12/5: Hawks 3, Minnesota 4
1/23: Minnesota 2, Hawks 1
4/3: Minnesota 2, Hawks 3 (SO)

14 goals scored, 14 goals allowed
7 points given, 4 points taken

Minnesota: 199 goals scored (2.427, 24th), 198 allowed (2.415, 7th), +1 differential (4th)
Hawks: 261 goals scored (3.183, 2nd), 212 allowed (2.585, 12th), +49 differential (16th)

It's not the same Wild team as last postseason. It's not even the same Wild team as this regular season. Backstrom is hurt again, Harding's MS is flaring up, and Darcy Kuemper was re-concussed at the end of Wednesday night's game, so they're down to their fourth-string goalie, the lightly disgraced Ilya Bryzgalov. You remember he signed a HUMAHNGOUS BEEG contract with the Flyers, sucked up the joint because he can't play for shit outside of country-club markets, took a 66%-OF-HUMAHNGOUS compliance buyout and went into some sort of exile before returning to the league via the Edmonton Oilers, kind of another exile unto itself. He wasn't any damn good there, and with Martin Jones emerging in Los Angeles, Ben Scrivens was in turn sent to North American Siberia and quickly established himself as the real-ass goalie the Oilers have cried out for. He's also really good at Scrabble. Bryzgalov, being crappy and only having a Scrabble rack for a name that cannot be played for a triple word score by virtue of being a proper noun, was traded to Minnesota for I don't remember or care what, and now against all odds, here he is.

The Wilds also acquired Matt Moulson from Buffalo by way of Long Island, the other side of the Thomas Vanek trade/unmitigated disaster. Moulson doesn't have anyone as good as John Tavares to clean up for, but between Parise, Koivu, and Coyle, it's not like his teammates generally suck. Speaking of unfortunate Long Island trades, Minnesota flipped glorified goon Cal Clutterbuck for the hysterically bungled Swiss prospect Nino Niederreiter, who finally found his footing and scored the series-winning goal. Mikael Granlund will be an All-Star in time. They can score, they just chose not to this year, apparently. Neither did the Kings, for that matter, and look how they flipped the switch.

Yeah, Minnesota won the season series, but I don't think the Hawks won a season series with anyone in the division but Dallas and Winnipeg, and Winnipeg was only four games and also fucking Winnipeg that can't do anything right ever. Whatever: we knocked out the Blues, the Avs were just dispatched, and the Perds took their dominance of the Hawks all the way to the 11th pick in the draft. What's mildly concerning, though, is that only one of those losses, the 2-1 coma on ice in St. Paul, came during the protracted dark night of the soul we call "the whole second half of this season." The Hawks were actually rolling along quite well when they got edged in October and December. If I remember correctly, Jason Pominville had a lot to do with one or both of those wins, and while he missed a lot of last year's series, he's very much good to go for this one.

The key, now as last year as forever for the time being, is to wait out the Ryan Suter/Jonas Brodin pairing, which we might as well concede up front will completely erase Jonathan Toews like they did last year. Suter leads the league in aggregate time on ice with 208:32, or just over ten complete periods, no big deal. His Swedish sidekick trails by about forty minutes, but you can be reasonably certain that Yeo will have them conjoined at the hip for the purpose of taking away our stars -- a concept not unfamiliar to the Twin Cities, whose own Stars were taken away 21 years ago. But even if they play 32 minutes a night, that's 28 minutes that you're staring down the likes of Nate Prosser or Jared Spurgeon: dumb and short is no way to go through life, son.

The hockey probably won't be very pretty: rarely is it with this dump-and-chase team, and a gameplan that forces patience on the part of the Hawks certainly won't help. They're not as effective on the dump-and-chase as St. Louis, who themselves are not as effective as Los Angeles, but it's been good enough in front of crackerjack goaltending. Whether they'll get that from Laika the Space Dog remains to be seen. They're also not a bucket of dipshits like the Blues were: just 8th in times shorthanded this year at 250 to the Blues' 293. The Hawks cannot REPEAT CANNOT be as fucking sloppy as they were in the last round: the Wild ran a respectable 45/252 power play this year and have the right kind of personnel to cash those in. This is a series that has Andrew Shaw written all over it, Ben Smith too: with our first line inevitably rendered useless, we'll need greasy goals by the gallon. It'd be a great time to use Jeremy Morin for that reason, too, but I'm sure we need Brandon Bollig to sit on the bench and stroke his beard for the 58 1/2 minutes a night that he's not on the ice. I can see Morin coming in contingent on a Game 1 pantsing, but not otherwise.

Minnesota overachieved against an Avs team that double-plus overachieved. By rights, this should be a Hawks win in 5 or 6. I wish the Wild ill.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 7:24 am 
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I didn't watch any of the Avs / Wild series save for the 3rd period and overtime of game 7 but these aren't the same dump and chase Wild from last year. They skated toe to toe with Colorado and beat them at their own game. They ain't gonna be pushovers that's for sure. I still think Blackhawks win series but it's not going to be a cakewalk by any means.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 7:29 am 
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CH, Montreal didn't look too rusty last night after nine days off. That was a great game. You have to love a guy with the "first" name of P.K. as a hockey player. He should never leave the ice when the team is short handed.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 8:30 am 
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Hawks in 5


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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 11:59 am 
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Hawks in three.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 12:17 pm 
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I still say "Cal Clutterbuck" is a top-3 hockey name of all time.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 3:51 pm 
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That'd be a fun thread. Butch Goring is another. Other favorites of mine: Cam Neely, Zarley Zalapski, Dirk Graham, Dino Ciccarelli, Bep Guidolin, Maxim Afinogenov, Punch Imlach, Rocket Richard.

So hey, Josh Harding practiced today. Not sure if good.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 3:58 pm 
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Bryzgalov starting in net tonight, John Curry's the Wild's back up goalie.


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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 4:39 pm 
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I think this series is going to be tougher than most expect. I am going to say Hawks win it in 7. That home ice thing will be important.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 4:42 pm 
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All I know is that the Hawks haven't won a fucking game or scored a fucking goal against the Wild yet this round so I can only assume it must be all over ...... :eye:

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 4:55 pm 
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Hawks sweep. 5-1 win tonight.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 5:09 pm 
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I would like to think 5. But somehow something always complicates my Hawk life.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 5:11 pm 
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Hawks in 5. Win tonight 6-1.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 5:27 pm 
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I don't know how Bryzgalov has done against the Hawks, really. We haven't seen much of him for a while. He did well when we saw him with the Coyotes, but it's the Coyotes, so who knows how much was Bryzgalov and how much was the system. I think he made a relief appearance with the Oilers this year and was unspectacular. I don't expect him to singlehandedly win this series, I know that much.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 5:33 pm 
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Paper says we coast but somehow they beat the Avs so that is probably the source of my uneasiness.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 5:47 pm 
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The Avs were riding unsustainable shooting percentages/possession metrics. You don't rocket from second-to-last to division champion with that kind of weak defense. They got lucky, luck ran out. Coincidentally, the same thing happened to the Wild in 2011-12, I want to say, where they were on top of the league for a while before the numbers corrected themselves and the team plummeted.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 5:51 pm 
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Curious Hair wrote:
The Avs were riding unsustainable shooting percentages/possession metrics. You don't rocket from second-to-last to division champion with that kind of weak defense. They got lucky, luck ran out. Coincidentally, the same thing happened to the Wild in 2011-12, I want to say, where they were on top of the league for a while before the numbers corrected themselves and the team plummeted.



You really do sound like the senor columnist :lol:

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 5:54 pm 
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They don't want your thoughts. Send puck possession.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 6:14 pm 
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RFDC wrote:
I think this series is going to be tougher than most expect. I am going to say Hawks win it in 7. That home ice thing will be important.

I agree with Ralphus here, Hawks in 7. I just threw up in my mouth a bit at the thought of being on the same wavelength as Ralph though.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 6:17 pm 
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LET'S GO GAYS!!!! ....err, and Hawks.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 6:18 pm 
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badrogue17 wrote:
RFDC wrote:
I think this series is going to be tougher than most expect. I am going to say Hawks win it in 7. That home ice thing will be important.

I agree with Ralphus here, Hawks in 7. I just threw up in my mouth a bit at the thought of being on the same wavelength as Ralph though.

I feel your pain. My own opinion makes me throw up a little as well.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 6:21 pm 
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This is going to be a Thornberry level of Smashing! Wild will be lucky to win a home game.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 6:25 pm 
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I am glad to see the game starts at 8:30 tonight. For some reason I thought it was at 7 and we have a softball practice tonight at 7. 8:30 will be much better.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 6:44 pm 
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Rangers are hungry

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 6:48 pm 
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This Rangers/Penguins game is exactly what I fear for tonight. Wild playing on adrenaline and steal a game on a 'rusty' Hawks. It's game two that the fatigue kicks in.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 7:02 pm 
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Rangers are hungry

So am I. I ordered a Sausage onion and bacon pizza. And some garlic twists. Fuck me that's good shit.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 8:25 pm 
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Nets, Pens, Sox left to right. Ready to go. I wrapped my lips around a Fat Tire.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 8:33 pm 
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So if this fuckery goes to OT what happens then?

Great choice to jam every game back to back to back on the same channel, dickholes.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 8:35 pm 
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FFFFUUUUUCCCCKKKK YYYYOOOOOUUUUU

Can't put it on NHLN. Nope, gotta keep on NHL on the fly for those that don't want to watch the actual playoff game but would rather listen to people discuss the game that is going on.

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PostPosted: Fri May 02, 2014 8:35 pm 
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I won't make it up for full game. I normally snooze by 10:00. Oh well.

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