but I couldn't stay away...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XeShfUUbt7c

Bernstein:

Terry:

Drinky:

Larry:

CSFMB: Team Bernstein has been getting away with so much bullshit since you've left us.

Beardown: So I've been told.

Drinky: Fuck it. I'm gonna finally kill this sum bitch. Check me out, Terry!!!! Woooooooo hooooooooooo!!!!

Terry: Eeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Drinky vs. Beardown:

Bernstein: Oy. That's my dumb ass producer for you. Gun vs. Sword. That's what you call a bad match up.

Beardown: Don't worry, Bernsie. I just plugged him in the shoulder. He'll be fine.

Bernstein: Thanks for having mercy on the stupid, Beardown.

Beardown: You're welcome. Larry, take drinky to the Emergency Room.

Larry: Who the fuck are you to tell me what to do?

Bernstein: Larry!!!! Take drinky to the emergency room!!!!!

Larry: Yes, Dan!!!! Right away, Dan!!!!!

Goff: Man, I'm glad I don't have to deal with this shit anymore.

Beardown: Not so fast, Goffer. Two questions: 1. What's the real reason the Altanta station fired you? 2. Has Dan McNeil given you permission to come back to Chicago?

Goff: Motha Fucka!!!!

Beardown:

Welcome back , kid. Finish that suit of human skin and ready to assume your rightful place as board seer are ya?

_________________
Proud member of the white guy grievance committee

It aint the six minutes. Its what happens in those six minutes.

Missed you!

They don't make good action movies anymore.

You are a legend Beardown. You are always welcome.

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FUCK YES.

I knew it was only a matter of time before I....I mean Beardown, returned!

Guess who else just came back after a long absence in the last 24 hours?

_________________

Who?

I think this place is better (i.e. more entertaining) when Beardown posts.

_________________

Juggs.

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Hmmm. yeah him too.

But so did Ike.

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Beardown: Thanks Marion...I mean Spaulding. Missed you too.

Spaulding: Thanks

Beardown: I'm looking for a piece your father collected. Bronze medallion; center with a crystal. You know the one I mean?

Spaulding: Yah, I know it.

Beardown: I'm taking this Indy theme a little too far right now, aren't I?

Spaulding: Uhhh...yeah.

Beardown: Ok...I'm gonna stop now.

Nothing wrong with role playing!

_________________

Cool. Let's keep it going!!!!!

Spaulding:

Beardown: Hey!!!! I don't like role playing anymore.

Spaulding:

is a week long dose of abbattacola too much to not post about?

man this post was the epitome of the worst aspects of "the beardown experience."

0.0 (, mr blutarsky) actual steak in terms of in depth analysis of the situation/s potentially going down behind the scenes. 0.0 steak of grade-A muckracking and all the things that we've come to love and admire about beardown.... however 100.0% sizzle in terms of the self-referential "yeah i'm kind of really a pretty big fucking deal in the chicago sports radio world" stuff that actually gives his hatters fuel for the tire fire that is shitting on the CSFMB legend that is beardown.

so yeah dude, don't show up here after a long-unexplained-absence and do your little meme where you make all of the faces and have a conversation between 4-5 chicago sports talk radio personalities/figures and literally just show up to give yourself a round of applause for being back. do what the good lord put you on earth to do (or at least the person who mults as you) and take some time to LISTEN to the current state of chicago sports talk radio and then use your great johnny-carson-the-telepathic-wizard-dude (i forgot the name of the bit) powers to telepathically figure out just what's going through the minds of the people who make up the great soap opera that is prime time radio during the work hours when we're all bored shitless with our jobs and going online to bitch about sports and the state of the society/government that outsources all of our jobs overseas to help create some sort of "economic crisis" where simply put there's just less $$$ for the peasants nowadays because there's less work for the peasants nowadays and well, part of the great american work ethic is listening to sports talk radio and wondering just what the hell matt spiegel is thinking when he treats his tributosaurus gig as priority #1 on a wednesday night when we all know that coming to work each and every thursday morning helps build up the requisite ritual listening that is oh so important in the world of radio.

anyways i'm a bit babbling and thus i digress..... comeon beardown. you're way better than this self-congratulatory "hey i'm back so follow my lead and let's all give me a standing ovation cuz now the industry is shaking in its boots knowing that i'm back on the prowl" crap that you don't need to promote/cheerlead-for cuz if you showed up and made a post deftly breaking down the psychologiy of the current schism in danny-mack-related WSCR/WTFWG-877-THE-GAME drama (....cuz who the fuck honestly gives a shit about ESPN1000 these days? they mght as well save some $$$ and do what the head honchos at the big mouse have wanted to do since day 1 when they took over ESPN: just make all fo the ESPN stations homes of nationally syndicated programming and save millions of dollars from having to actually pay on air talent and just let the dulcet tones of colin cowherd do its job and absolutely RAPE the mac+speegs show... or well the 2 matt krew if they go speagol+amattacola or perhaps even SHAKE FAT if they decide to buy holmes out of his little internet radio contract and give him yet another daytime/mid-day gig to prove that nobody in chicago really goes out of their way to listen to lawrence holmes.... and when given a choice between listneing to lawrence holmes or sitting around scratching your ass with no radio on whatsoever, welp, hey maybe 'll go and listen to lawrence holmes.

now combine that name-brand radio indifference with the radio heavyweight that is DURR SPEAGOL and i guarantee you that within 2yrs the dynamic duo of SHAKE FAT will rule the roost of mid-day sports talk radio.... if only because danny mack daddy will negotiate a deal were he does drivetime for WTFWG-THE-GAME because you know his #1 mission in life upon leaning the score will be to kick FOTStein's ass all over the place as he's undoubtedly still salty that his guy mitch never anointed the prodigal son with his preferred drive-time shift because even tho he always kicked b&b's ass over at ESPN1000, yeah dude, you weren't gonna come back here and rule the roost like NORT did before they took him downstairs (morning show) and got him out of there.

so yeah beardown... i digress AGAIN. and i only posted all of this TL;DR drivel (while two muslim dudes have a very heated argument at the end of my driveway. i swear to god if i hear 3 gunshots before hearing "ALLAH WILLS IT!!!" i'm just gonna yell out "I AINT SEE NOTHING" and pray i live to see anotehr day) to try and captivate you into posting better... cuz lord knows when i go longform only 2/10 CSFMBers prolly read it, but dammit the 2 who read it are definitely reading it (i'm loathe to say entertained), and that's all that matters, eh?

_________________

_________________

sini, For as intelligent and funny as you can be sometimes, you can be a real jerk too. For some or all of Beardown's flaws I don't think he would talk to you like that. Let us know when you are done patting yourself on the back for setting things straight for Beardown. He is free to do as he pleases, as are you.

Alternative comeback music for those that want different. I won't even write a play. Better?

For the fellas:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j5-yKhDd64s

For the ladies:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LwsaoLEvWbw

You actually read all of that?

_________________

Carnac the Magnificent

_________________
You know me like that.

Or Tito's

NM. I got it. I thought you blurted out Carnac the Magnificent for no reason.

_________________
"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

Welcome back, Beardown. You have been missed.

_________________
I don't remember half the time if I'm hiding or I'm lost

Welcome back Beardown. Sini is right. You've got work to do.

thought we had lost you to MSFMB

_________________
O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

_________________
This is my signature...

Why did you post this?

_________________

Any post that includes the phrase SHAKE FAT is all right by me.

_________________
The Bulls haven't done anything wrong, and they're not going to do anything wrong.

He was trying to help you get your mult back on track.

_________________
Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don