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I've cried enough over the past 2 days to last a lifetime. Sadly, the tears aren't going anywhere any time soon, as my brother isn't out of the woods yet. I've waited a couple of days before posting this, as my faith has deteriorated over the years, so I'm not sure why I'm even doing this now. But, my brother could use whatever prayers, juju, mojo or however the hell you want to put it. Here's why:
In September of 1995, Chris was diagnosed with cardiomyopathy. A virus settled in his heart, damaging it to where his ejection fraction, which measures the amount of your heart that's working, was 5. He could've died at any moment. Hours after being admitted to Loyola Medical Center, Chris was put on a heart transplant list. Doctors said he wouldn't leave Loyola until his ejection fraction got into the 30s. It never got above 17, and that was with medication being pumped directly into his jugular. Miracle of miracles, despite not getting above 17, Chris was released in November, in time for Thanksgiving. Talk about being thankful. He continued seeing his cardiologist every 3 or 4 months, but went on living as normal of a life as he can even with his ejection fraction staying at 17.
Fast forward to the past 8-10 years. Chris had a defibrillator installed. There have been some scares during this time, but nothing major. That brings me to this past Wednesday.
Chris called me at 6:30 am. He opened the conversation with, “I need you to take me to the doctor.” That's all he said. Didn't allude to the severity of how he was feeling. He only added that he “didn't feel right.” I started getting dressed, and he called again. “Don't rush. It's not an emergency.” I didn't listen and was out the door in 10 minutes.
I forgot to mention: his wife just gave birth to their 1st child, Zoey, and is unable to drive. Hence why he called me.
I got to his house and again, because he didn't allude to just how bad he was feeling, I thought I would be able to see his wife and see the baby for a second. I knew he wasn't feeling well when he came right out when I pulled into his driveway.
We got to the hospital, I dropped him at the ER, and I parked my car. I joined him at the check-in table, where a nurse was going over his meds. My brother was coherent and able to talk about all the meds he's on (he sounds like a doctor himself when discussing them), so I left to give him some privacy. I was in the ER waiting room for about a half hour without any updates, so I texted him, “Any word on what's up? Do you want me to join you in the room?” Never heard back.
About a half hour later, a nurse asked me to join her in a private office. That's when my family's world came crashing down. Chris had collapsed in the room where the nurse was talking to him, and they were administering CPR. Still were, in fact, while the nurse was telling me this. For about 45 minutes, they worked on him while his defibrillator kept going off. They were finally able to stabilize a heartbeat but he had to be sedated almost to the point of a coma, though that word hasn't been used, intubated so a ventilator can help him breath, and dressed with cooling pads to minimize any brain damage that may have occurred while they were giving him CPR.
He remains on a ventilator and is still in that coma-like state. He responds to the doctors to squeeze their hand or wiggle his toes. He's even done that for me. The saddest part was when I played a recording of his not yet 2 week old baby crying. He totally started jerking his arms. I know he heard her. I'm bawling my eyes out typing this.
If he would've called me a 3rd time Wednesday morning to say not to bother coming to get him, he would already be dead, as I didn't know how bad things were and would've listened to him. He never wants to put anyone out, and I wouldn't have questioned him.
The issue as to why he collapsed centers on the amount of potassium he took to help with cramping issues he was having. The cramps were so severe, he had a hard time getting out of bed to feed his baby, which he wanted to do so his wife could sleep. If you're like me, you thought, “Potassium overdose? WTF?” But, yes, it can happen, and a major side effect is heart failure, which for someone with an already weakened heart, is a recipe for disaster. He's always so careful with his meds, but in this instance, wanting to feed the baby so his wife could sleep, caused him to keep taking potassium, as he probably figured, “How could it hurt?”
I'm sorry for the long story, but I really need the universe's support, and with all of the laughs I get from this place, I needed a place to turn to outside of the avenues I've already exhausted.
Please have a positive thought for my brother, his wife, their newborn baby, and the rest of my family. I really appreciate it.
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