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Back off, Warchild. Seriously.

They are no longer what you guys remember them as. They are overpriced and don't give much money back to the school.

We order the scholastic stuff occasionally. We are kindle, library, series stuff.

Never had a book fair.

We had RIF catalogs.

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You know me like that.

Someone shared a video of an altercation at a liquor store between two girls. Out of nowhere, some guy jumps in and just starts pounding on the one girl, "defending" his girlfriend. Just realized it was a liquor store in my hometown. I recognized the owner being in the video. I don't miss that place

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-- source

one time i was at this real hodunk liquor store in maryland...like the white trashiest part of it (elkton), and when i was coming out from buying some brew, i saw this skinhead dude in a wife beater yelling at (presumably) his ex in a pickup truck with some other chick. she revs up the engine and starts to drive off, and he jumps on the hood while it's driving off. because i thought he was gonna pull something, i just got the hell out of there. but it would've been great to capture that on video.

a guy i know from fishing came back to facebook after a few month hiatus and told us all that if we post religious stuff or woe is me bull shit, he will unfriend us.

the last few months all he posts is woe is me about his girlfriend who left him like a year ago posting music videos and lyrics and then posts a ton of new age body and mind pictures like "emit your own frequency don't absorb others frequencies" and other bull shit.

hilarious.

Not sure if she's an actual recognized Saint or not


Heading to a soccer tournament. At 7am. On a Saturday. In the pouring rain. On Halloween. In 45 degrees....... I must be crazy right?????? Nope I just love my daughter!!!!!!!!!

Facebook's killer app is that it informs you of how much you actually dislike your friends.

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

She's my brother's ex gf from high school. Not sure why were friends. She's nice but she's a saintly facebook mom who deserves wine

You don't deserve a fucking medal for being a parent. Unless she expects participation awards for those who braved the weather on the sidelines?

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-- source

Its a group of saintly mothers

Under that status she and 5 other moms are tagged in this one


Soaked...The inside of my car looks like a clothes line and I am on fire because the defrost is on high... Dry kids just to get soaked again.. What we do for this group!!! We love soccer!!

Evidently, they also love bragging about doing normal parent tasks.


Maybe later today I'll post something like "Just took my dog for a walk and picked up her shit...with my hands...in a plastic bag. Am I crazy or do I love playing with poop? Nope, I just love my pets!"

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My fiancee works nights and is going back to school, so saying her life is hectic would be an understatement. Anyway, this means I have our little guy to myself a few nights a week and virtually every weekend. I do the shopping and things like that. You wouldn't believe how many people come up to me at the grocery store and say "Oh, looks like dad has him so mom can catch up on sleep!" That statement really annoys me. Right, because I'm not up all night with him 3-4 days a week. She does a ton for us. No doubt. I wanna go all DiCaro on them. OH MY GOD HOW DO I HANDLE THIS BABY WITH ME. CAN YOU CHANGE THE DIAPER FOR ME, LADY? WHY ISN'T THERE A CHANGING TABLE IN THE MEN'S ROOM. STOP PARENT-SHAMING ME.

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-- source

Just saying, can't imagine anyone coming up to her and saying the same thing.

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-- source

Oh, for sure. I had a mom say to me "so your wife makes you take her to gymnastics?"


What the fuck?

Im not married. But still. That's wildly sexist.

No joke. This was an exchange at work a few months ago.

Caller Bob I can't stand: Where'd you go for lunch?
RSG: Actually just ran out to get some clothes for RSG JR.
CICS: Oh, why didn't RSG's fiancee do that?
RSG: What?
CICS: My husband wouldn't buy clothes for our kids. That's what I do.
RSG: Oh, because I wanted to? (walks away, dies a little inside)

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-- source

Jesus.

Moms are bitches. I just thought it was a Facebook thing, but I guess not. Thing is, until I read this thread, it would never even cross my mind to think about something like that-- let alone say it-- to a Dad with a kid.

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Oh man you missed a golden oppurtunity to paint her husband as the loser that he probably is

Oh, well yeah, I love my child, but to each their own

Dammit. That would have been a great response. I've met her husband. He's a racist asshole.

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-- source

You work with Mrs Elmhurst Steve?!?

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Course he is.

Probably slapped her around a bit after that Bears loss yesterday like the 50's man that he is

Yeah...I get this a lot when we go to the store...

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I get that a ton! We moved down to Atlanta 3 months ago for my wife's job. I'm a software developer so I can be remote and it doesn't matter. So many of the Caller Bobs here look at me with shock when I say we relocated for my wife. I now resort to saying only useless people have to report into a office like drones. Valuable people work where ever the fuck they want. Where does your husband work again.

Yeah, fuck those places without changing tables in the men's room, assholes.

When the baby is a little older you will get hit on because they will think you are a single parent. It happens to mr Spaulding occasionally.

I'm actually looking forward to experiencing this. Should lead to some good stories.

I'll be the primary caregiver so I'll have lots of chances. I already asked her to write a note explaining why I am with the kid that I can show people.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

This even happens to an unattractive oaf such as myself.

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May I suggest attempting to nurse with the other moms at the park.

I have applied for membership in the local breastfeeding club.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

Cute kids are pussy magnets.

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Good people drink good beer - Hunter S. Thompson

<º)))><

Waiting for the time when I can finally say
That this has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way