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all yours, spmack

Janet is our nickname for our oldest sibling. lives out in vegas. writes books about how her family is mean to her for not sending her more money to gamble away at the casinos. everyone likes, loves her, first they meet her. takes a bit to see the reality; which is why she has a double-digit roster of ex-husbands. i think they even have matching jackets; the ex-husbands, not the books.

must be a girl thing. guys get over it. get into a fist-fight and then patch things up over double-whiskeys and beer and a ball-game on tv.

dayum, put it into the seats on the first pitch.

you sound like a girl. jes sayin.

Withholding forgiveness damages you more than the offender. That doesn't mean you have to be a available to be hurt again

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

I'm not withholding anything.

Forgiveness is overrated. It's great if the other party actively is seeking it and is likely to correct the reasons in the future but otherwise it is just setting yourself up for more disappointment. It's ok to have negative feelings towards someone based on their actions. It allows you to concentrate on the people in your life that are worth your time.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

Then why are you asking this question?

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

Nope. If you can't let something go you end up with 100 pages about Julie DiCaro. Meanwhile, DiCaro gives no cares.

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

Spaulding, you can always forgive IMU.

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In the time you could convince yourself about forgiveness you can just have indifference.

The problem with forgiveness without the other party actively looking for it is that when something else happens down the road it gets all brought up again and also the new stuff gets added on and it actually makes it worth. One of the best things you eventually figure out is you won't like everyone and everyone won't like you and that is ok.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

Not true

I made a poor choice reading this thread. I'm going to pore over the details of it later. It does remind me of this quote though,.. ""Happiness is a perfume which you cannot pour on someone without getting some on yourself." (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

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Proud to be UNVERIFIED.

which part?

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

I have forgiven Rick for his thoughts hundreds of times.

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I think the problem with "apologies" is that the words "I'm sorry" are thrown around so much, they lose their meaning. When you're truly sorry, you don't repeat said offense. You don't even need to say you're sorry. You just make amends and genuinely change as a person. That makes it easy to forgive someone. But forgiveness is a personal choice. I had to forgive some people that aren't sorry at all for what they did. Like it's been said in this thread, it's more for you than it is for them. And it does bring peace, when you can really forgive.

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Good people drink good beer - Hunter S. Thompson

<º)))><

Waiting for the time when I can finally say
That this has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way

I would say devote more time to the people in your life that are worth a damn and less time to those that are quick to step on your feelings. We stopped having a relationship with my side of the family and holidays are so much more enjoyable and rewarding now.

Remember just because they are family doesn't mean you HAVE to keep them around. You might give them a longer rope but eventually they will find a way to hang themself.

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time....

give it time....

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@audioidkid

one could argue that forgiveness is a 2 person process. the first person in the process has to be the "wronger" and the first step must be a request for forgiveness. Teh 2nd person has to be the "wrongee" and must therefore grant the forgiveness. basically there is no forgiveness without repentance. While one could possibly create a 1 sided scenario where one can feel at peace with someone that wronged them, true forgiveness is the answer to which there must be a question.

This is re: Christianity's definition of forgiveness mind you. Christ forgives those who repent.

I don't forgive people if they are sorry.

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You know me like that.

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Power is always in the hands of the masses of men. What oppresses the masses is their own ignorance, their own short-sighted selfishness.
- Henry George

Incorrect.

Forgiveness is offered freely to all, full stop.

Whether a given person takes Him up on the offer or not is a different matter. The point is it's already there regardless of any sort of acceptance of it by anyone. Your suggestion indicates that someone has to do something not only for it to exist, but also to earn it, which, honestly, profanes the Gospel.

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Power is always in the hands of the masses of men. What oppresses the masses is their own ignorance, their own short-sighted selfishness.
- Henry George

i prefaced that whole thing with, "one could argue". Jesus only forgives the criminal who recognized that he needed it. Its offered freely but isn't full circle until accepted or requested.

I sat through quite a few of these types of debates in my theology classes. quite frankly i thought it quite unproductive and thought it akin to "does God make things happen or does God allow things to happen" when both are quite plausible at the same time. Seemed there were other things worth worrying about more.

Sentimental hogwash!

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