"this guy led the league in earned run average..."

clayton kershaw's 149IP of 1.69 ERA literally and figuratively doesn't count, eh? i think the final tally was kershaw at 149IP of 1.69/0.73 and hendricks had 180IP of 2.13 ERA.... slight difference there (and obviously the postseason is what it is)

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Nobody under the age of 75 listens to AM radio.

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If the minimum for starting pitchers is 150 innings, then it doesn't. As they said to Harvey Haddix, tough shit.

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Not having Russell or Hendricks or Baez say anything?

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You know me like that.

"and a nice welcome for pitcher joe smith!"

holy shit i forgot he was on the team. did he pitch any more than like 5-10 innings after he was acquired?

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You know me like that.

At Cactus on Wells with IMU and Den(n)is.

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Sex isn't dirty, sex isn't a crime. It's a loving act between two or more consenting adults.

-Hank Kingsley

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Power is always in the hands of the masses of men. What oppresses the masses is their own ignorance, their own short-sighted selfishness.
- Henry George

Totally forgot about that guy.

Cool of Rizzo to pull a Konerko and give the ball to the owner.

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who?

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Power is always in the hands of the masses of men. What oppresses the masses is their own ignorance, their own short-sighted selfishness.
- Henry George

Fuck that rich asshole. Keep the ball for yourself.

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Rizzo gave the ball to Tom Ricketts. I want to cry. It was beautiful.

I was hoping after he talked about the value of the ball, he would have just thrown the damn thing into the sea of humanity.

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2005 Yeah I figured he would.

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Elections have consequences.

Sell it to Harry Carry's to blow up and put in some spaghetti.

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It would have been funny if he threw a fake one into the crowd and killed a few people and then said just kidding.

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You know me like that.

I'm starting to get concerned that they might not win another game without David Ross.

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You know me like that.

The Chicago first baseman who led his team to the World Series championship. Back when no Chicago team had done that in longer than 11 years

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I wish they would have let Chapman talk just to give DiCaro a coronary.

She might have crashed Twitter on her own.

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You know me like that.

I thought you got a 80-game suspension for "pulling a Konerko".

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You know me like that.

Greatest heckle I (or probably anyone in history) ever had was Sox vs Cubs on the south side. I had seats 10 rows back behind first base dugout. Big rain delay, seats empty. Rain stops and people slowly start to come back to their seats but place still pretty empty when play resumes. Grace up to bat, gets hammered by a pitch and goes down hard. Trainer comes out. Finally gets up and starts hobbling his way to first base. As he passes I yell out...

Hey Grace, I bet it hurt worse when Ray Liota screwed your wife!


Because the place was so empty you could hear it pretty much across the entire field. Even the Cubs fans were gasping like damn, that's harsh.

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That's for beating your captain.

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Men need to have a discussion with their friends about "pulling a Konerko".

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

how many people are going to be sexually assaulted at this thing

DID.NOT.HAPPEN.

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How many women are there.

Because that's your number. Just ask Julie DiCanada.

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There's needs to be a commission to design a cooler World Series trophy. You can say what you want about hockey, but the Stanley Cup is light years cooler than MLB World Series trophy.

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God is the uncaused cause of the universe. He had no beginning and has no end. He is not bound by the laws of the universe he created.

But the book of Peter 19:85 states that this trophy will always be of this design, and unto it, you should not make a change. It's in the Bible, so it must be true.

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Power is always in the hands of the masses of men. What oppresses the masses is their own ignorance, their own short-sighted selfishness.
- Henry George

i guess that's just like lena dunham being the hottest chick in the world thanks to the minor caveat of being the only chick that you know exists (likely cuz she's standing right in front of you and therefore blocking your view of the rest of the world)

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