The first bachelor party in our group of friends was to Vegas. Luckily it was 4 years ago but that was even worse since Vegas is a vacuum cleaner for money.

I've noticed the larger the party (10-12+ people) the more ridiculous the location/idea as the cost for the bachelor get socialized. So the bachelor gets ridiculous ideas since he's not contributing much.

I blame shit like The Hangover for nonsense like this.

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But even that movie was just a couple hours drive to Vegas.

Maybe I'm just cut from a different cloth. Golf in the AM, party at a house or bar with entertainment in the PM was all I wanted.

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Yeah, no shit. It seems awfully presumptuous to ask people to spend $1,000 to go to your party.

Yeah, mine was just a bar...then burritos at like midnight. It was awesome.

Nothing wrong with dinner at a nice steakhouse and a pub crawl, either...

This out of town shit...especially at the noted pricetags, if fucking nuts.

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A bachelor party thread could have some potential... My wife and her friends flew to New Orleans for a weekend. I invited guys to play
paintball and then we had a party at a buddies house with grilling and drinking involved. Never understood the destination wedding or
the getaway bachelor party. I turned down two weddings for very close friends who got married in Jamaica and Mexico. I couldn't figure
out why I was spending thousands and use my vacation time to go to their weddings.

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Flew too close to the sun on wings of pastrami

Wasn't a destination wedding how Nas wound up with his 17th kid?

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freaking destination bachelor parties? screw that. i've ranted on here somewhere about how much i despise weddings in the first place. i was asked to be in a wedding that would take place in rivera maya a handful of years back. i told him to go pound sand. his now wife has finally gotten over it because i'm so enjoyable to be around, but she was pissed that i wouldn't shell out whatever ungodly amount of money that bs would of cost. i'm also pretty sure their marriage is failing.

my buddy just cut his wife off from weddings. he did the math, they've spent a total of 20k in the last 15 months going to weddings. like every weekend they are out of town.

i have a list of weddings i need to go to. certain people/family that i will go to their wedding and even participate if needed. that list has like 10 people on it. everyone else can go screw themselves. what a waste of a saturday.

yeah yeah yeah, i'm no fun. actually i'm a blast. everyone likes me i'll have you know.

Good thing he was going to the beach.

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Good people drink good beer - Hunter S. Thompson

<º)))><

Waiting for the time when I can finally say
That this has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way

We've been quoting Leslie Chow all week.....

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Hawaii (fuck) You

You are a strange little shit.

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He is the worst part of the movie.

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Good people drink good beer - Hunter S. Thompson

<º)))><

Waiting for the time when I can finally say
That this has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way

Nothing against you Denis, but middle-aged men running around Vegas quoting Hangover lines...

Well I'll transfer my post to the things only I think are funny thread. I feed them cocaine and chicken.

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Hawaii (fuck) You

Everybody in Vegas is a tourist, but some people look the part more than others.

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Good people drink good beer - Hunter S. Thompson

<º)))><

Waiting for the time when I can finally say
That this has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way

I'm umping little league girls softball games in my hometown just to kinda get involved in Brookfield softball before my 4yo daughter starts in it. It pays $42 a game (paid every two weeks by check), whatever, not really doing it for the money. Anyway, I'm supposed to ump a game on Saturday and I get a call today (because I'm IHSA patched) offering $120 cash at the field to umpire a double header at Nazareth at the same time. I already told him what time the game I was supposed to do was, before he told me when his doubleheader was so I'd look like a jerk if I said I'd cancel my game and he'd probably never call me again if he knew I'd drop games for the highest bidder so I declined, but I still feel cheated.

You did the right thing.

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Good people drink good beer - Hunter S. Thompson

<º)))><

Waiting for the time when I can finally say
That this has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way

I'll show up at the lesser paying one and pose as you, KD. I promise I'll keep my clothes on.

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$42 for girls softball? That's nice. I used to get $26 a game for doing adult leagues and I had to deal with douchebags.

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Don't take it personally.

$20 a game for little league in Arlington Heights...and I used to have to deal with the fucking parents. I'd rather deal with douchebags.

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Pretty sure there is a 5 mile wide radius of all children/schools/playgrounds you need to stand clear of, FlapJacks.

Little League parents can be bad but there's nothing worse than the asshole in a coed league who is playing like he's Pete Rose in Game 7 of a World Series.

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Don't take it personally.

I used to get $20 a game umping or refereeing for various age groups. Always had to laugh at the parents who got bent out of shape at grade school basketball games. They'd blow a gasket if I missed a travel call. If I'd called travel every time one occurred, the games never would have ended.

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Here's one of my best ump/ref stories. At the time I attended my high school was a fucking football factory. That shit was taken seriously, like Texas seriously. One day after soccer practice I was watching the freshman team play in Horner Park. The coach was a goof named Bob Carskie. Of course our team was crushing the shit out of whoever they were playing. The game was coming down to the end and we were about to score again. They were down on the goal line with seconds left in the game. Carskie called a fucking timeout. The referee threw the flag before the the center even picked up the ball. Good for him.

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Don't take it personally.

Absolutely. Some of these coaches and parents are psychopaths living out their egomaniacal dreams through freakin' kids. Freshmen in high school are what, 14 years old? That's real nice to shove another one down their throat just to make sure they don't forget. In the words of 312, smh.

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When I was 16 or 17, I had this manager that absolutely hated my guts. His team was awful, and there used to be a lot of called 3rd strikes against them. For the first month of the season, I always seemed to be assigned to a game of theirs every week (played 3 games a week). Anyway, the 4th week or so, he comes up to me and says, "are we gonna do this again?" I ask him what...his response, "you gonna call my kids out on strikes another 10 goddamn times?" So I asked him, "have you coached them to take the bats off their shoulders yet?" He starts sputtering and mf-ing me about how hard it is to coach a bunch of 7th and 8th graders. I say ok and tell him to get back to his bench.

His team is pitching first, so we line up to start the game. He had this kid who had a terrific arm starting the game...very accurate, threw in the 60's or low 70's...just an absolute stud arm. Kid winds up and next thing I know, I feel the sharp pain in the thigh area. I look at the catcher like, "you ok" wondering if he fainted or had a seizure or some shit, and the kid sold his coach out. The fucking asshole told the catcher (who was his kid) to dive on the first pitch to teach me a lesson.

I walk over to the bench like "what the hell". Cockstain just looked at me and goes, "I guess Matt missed". I ran his ass out of that game so fast, it wasn't funny. The coach was suspended the rest of the year, and he was done coaching because his kid aged out.

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Thats crazy Boyd. I had the same thing happen to me about 12 years ago.

Kids had to be about 10 or 12. Team A was killing Team B, and Team B's manager did not like any of my calls. I had a wide plate, but it was that way for both teams so the games didn't turn into walk-a-thons. About an inning or so before the slaughter rule could be called, Team A had a runner at 3rd who came home on a wild pitch. Pitcher (who was Team B coach's son) covered home, and the Catcher's flip had the runner beat by plenty. But it was a real high flip that the pitcher had to jump for, Team A player slid to the back of the plate and wasn't tagged until after he crossed the plate with this entire body. Thus, safe.

Parents freak, manager freaks, I said there was no tag. Next pitch, the catcher took a dive, but the pitch ended up about 10' high, which allowed another run to score. The manager at this point was already walking back to his car as I gave him the heave ho. He taught his kids real well that day.

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The coach is a maniac but the dedication to hating you was great.

I admire the fire and passion of that coach. Never take your eye off the ball!

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Reality is your friend, not your enemy. -- Seacrest

The funny thing is that I probably had the tightest strike zone in the whole fucking league...we were supposed to call the plate, and shoulders to knees. I never called anything over the letters or the outside corner. If anything, they should have hated me for that...

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