Yeah, mine was just a bar...then burritos at like midnight. It was awesome.

Nothing wrong with dinner at a nice steakhouse and a pub crawl, either...

This out of town shit...especially at the noted pricetags, if fucking nuts.

When I was 16 or 17, I had this manager that absolutely hated my guts. His team was awful, and there used to be a lot of called 3rd strikes against them. For the first month of the season, I always seemed to be assigned to a game of theirs every week (played 3 games a week). Anyway, the 4th week or so, he comes up to me and says, "are we gonna do this again?" I ask him what...his response, "you gonna call my kids out on strikes another 10 goddamn times?" So I asked him, "have you coached them to take the bats off their shoulders yet?" He starts sputtering and mf-ing me about how hard it is to coach a bunch of 7th and 8th graders. I say ok and tell him to get back to his bench.

His team is pitching first, so we line up to start the game. He had this kid who had a terrific arm starting the game...very accurate, threw in the 60's or low 70's...just an absolute stud arm. Kid winds up and next thing I know, I feel the sharp pain in the thigh area. I look at the catcher like, "you ok" wondering if he fainted or had a seizure or some shit, and the kid sold his coach out. The fucking asshole told the catcher (who was his kid) to dive on the first pitch to teach me a lesson.

I walk over to the bench like "what the hell". Cockstain just looked at me and goes, "I guess Matt missed". I ran his ass out of that game so fast, it wasn't funny. The coach was suspended the rest of the year, and he was done coaching because his kid aged out.

Here's one of my best ump/ref stories. At the time I attended my high school was a fucking football factory. That shit was taken seriously, like Texas seriously. One day after soccer practice I was watching the freshman team play in Horner Park. The coach was a goof named Bob Carskie. Of course our team was crushing the shit out of whoever they were playing. The game was coming down to the end and we were about to score again. They were down on the goal line with seconds left in the game. Carskie called a fucking timeout. The referee threw the flag before the the center even picked up the ball. Good for him.

I think I've seen Pierzynski do that in a game but he was subtle about it.

Our hotel smelled like dead hooker vagina (before you ask I had gotten a detailed description from beardown)

The funny thing is that I probably had the tightest strike zone in the whole fucking league...we were supposed to call the plate, and shoulders to knees. I never called anything over the letters or the outside corner. If anything, they should have hated me for that...

I believe he ended up being a pretty good head coach at Weber

I worked some games for my buddy Jerry who died. He ran all these leagues on the Northwest side, mostly girls but some coed. At one time he had guys but they were too much of a headache. Most of them sucked but they all thought they were Willie Mays and they complained and argued about everything so he got rid of the men's leagues. Anyway, he'd usually work a game on one diamond himself and me or another one of our crew would work a game on the opposite diamond. We wanted to get done quick to get out to Sportsman's Park. Jerry had it set up so all counts started 1-1. The first thing we would do is get the two pitchers and tell them, "I call a huge strikezone. You two are gonna love me but I don't want to hear any whining from your teammates. Tell them to get up there and hit the ball." We got those games finished quickly.

Our hotel smelled like dead hooker vagina (before you ask I had gotten a detailed description from beardown)

I have an argument with a buddy that youth baseball is actually a tool of Satan to make everyone involved incredibly miserable. He thinks it builds character. He's in sales.

Good thing he was going to the beach.

I worked some games for my buddy Jerry who died.

I think it really depends on the parents and how they interact with each other. Left in peace the kids seem to figure it out pretty well on their own.

I'm a big dumb shitlib baby

I do think parents have gotten worse. Even when I was a kid, it was just fun.

Our hotel smelled like dead hooker vagina (before you ask I had gotten a detailed description from beardown)

He died as a result of your umpiring?

I'm a touch older than you, but I remember dickish parents when I played...their kids were usually the ones that went on to start for high school squads because they had other brothers that played earlier seasons...but yeah, as a whole, I think parents have gotten worse.

I'm a big dumb shitlib baby

Criminal this got no laughs.



He died as a result of your umpiring?

I'm a touch older than you, but I remember dickish parents when I played...their kids were usually the ones that went on to start for high school squads because they had other brothers that played earlier seasons...but yeah, as a whole, I think parents have gotten worse.

One of my buddies was showing me a "Parent Contract" they have to sign for his kid's baseball. It basically says that they will treat people with respect, etc. I couldn't believe it.

Our hotel smelled like dead hooker vagina (before you ask I had gotten a detailed description from beardown)

I was going to say Jorr sure has a lot of dead friends. I was fraid someone else said it before or I did and couldn't remember.

I was going to say Jorr sure has a lot of dead friends. I was fraid someone else said it before or I did and couldn't remember.

One of my buddies was showing me a "Parent Contract" they have to sign for his kid's baseball. It basically says that they will treat people with respect, etc. I couldn't believe it.

Trae Young will be a bust. Book It!

They have had the 24 hour rule out here for at least the last 10 years my son played sports.

Trae Young will be a bust. Book It!

I'm a big dumb shitlib baby

There is not a damned thing wrong with people who are bull shitters.

I have MANY years of experience in trying to appreciate steaming piles of dogshit.