They just set up a Shabbos elevator in my building. The condo board is run by Orthodox Jews. I never attend any meetings but I do read the minutes and there was no mention of it in there. It kind of pisses me off, but I feel like it would be petty to go to a meeting just to beef about it.

Anyway, I find it as utterly ridiculous as if the board had voted to create an entrance to the building for ghosts. Beyond that, I think it's phony religiousness. You know G_d's intention was that you not operate machinery on the Sabbath. Do you really think he wanted you to figure out a work-around?

But Israel literally means "he who struggles with G_d". I mean it took a lot of chutzpah for Jacob to wrestle an angel. Even Roddy Piper probably wouldn't have done that. A Catholic would never try to outsmart God. We just do what we want and figure we can ask for forgiveness later. But the Jews have a special relationship with G_d. They're always trying to bust him on a technicality. I can actually picture shakes putting G_d on the stand and grilling him on the meaning of keeping holy the Sabbath.

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Freedom is our Strength.

I'm not clear, what the hell is a Shabbos Elevator?

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I think he means: Shabbat?

An elevator that stops automatically at every floor and runs from the start of a Jewish holiday until the end. Users don't have to actually do anything to "activate" the machine.

Jews aren't supposed to operate equipment like use a stove or really do any work on the Sabbath. Running the elevator falls under that restriction. So they set up an elevator to automatically open and stop on each floor.

My building also has electronic entrances. I guess they're not supposed to break that circuit either. Many times I will come home on a Saturday and see a bunch of Orthodox Jews waiting for someone to open the door for them. One day I walked up and there was a guy in his black suit and hat with a bunch of children. He gave me a huge smile and said, "Our savior!" I said, "I don't think so."

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Freedom is our Strength.

Not going to lie, I always roll my eyes at these little tricks Orthodox use to bend the rules. I mean stuff like this, stringing fricken stuff on utility polls to create an eruv, etc.

You might be following the letter of Jewish law, but you'r certainly breaking the spirit of it with stuff like this, electric timers, etc. Just my 2 cents.

Granted I say this as an agnostic Jew who eats pulled pork sandwiches and enjoys shellfish because damn they are good.

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“When I walked in this morning, and saw the flag was at half mast, I thought 'alright another bureaucrat ate it.'" - Ron Swanson

are they allowed to operate stairs?

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Reality is your friend, not your enemy. -- Seacrest

Organized religion is a farce and we all know it. Those who refuse to admit it are just scared that they'll be stricken down by the Almighty on the off chance they're wrong.

(They're not.)

Yeah, but some of these people are old and fat. And many of them live of the sixth floor.

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Freedom is our Strength.

There are two eruv in my neighborhood.

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Freedom is our Strength.

God damn that's....something.

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Is G_d's name Larry Hoover by chance?

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The Amish seem to use the same sort of loopholes. They won't fly, but Amtrak is fine. I once watched them making cabinets, and they use pneumatic tools instead electric, because electricity is not allowed but I guess compressed air is ok.

As a former Catholic, I would do pretty much whatever I wanted, but was very strict about not eating meat on Fridays during Lent. I hope that covers me at the pearly gates when the time comes.

Let me guess, there is no Palestinian elevator?

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

Jews get all the breaks.

SAD!

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The Amish have set their rules differently, though. The local leader of the congregation makes the rules in regards to the level of the current world they are allowed to live in. The local Amish newspaper has neat ads, offering Amish cell phones- NO internet or games, Just a phone. For some, that is okay, others, no telephone at all. Some use a public pay phone.

The Orthodox Jewish laws are more centralized. There still is wiggle room for local group application, but far less than a group like the Amish.

I'm sure you've noticed, but living in an eruv gives you a healthy boost to your property values as there are Orthodox Jews lining up to buy limited housing inventory.

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“When I walked in this morning, and saw the flag was at half mast, I thought 'alright another bureaucrat ate it.'" - Ron Swanson

so ridiculous

The Amish have tons of different rules depending on which sect they are. The ones in Arthur for example are still horse and buggy. Others will allow tractors but they have to have steel wheels instead of three. Our local ones up near Tampico might as well be English except the clothes they wear. Drive black cars, have cell phones, at their businesses they use whatever tool they want. Have electricity and all. Hell, one flies around in an ultra light and has a helicopter crop dusting business. You wouldn't know they were Amish except for the clothes and beards on the married men and the German accents. That being said they are incredibly nice people.

How has this not made its way into the thread?

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“When I walked in this morning, and saw the flag was at half mast, I thought 'alright another bureaucrat ate it.'" - Ron Swanson

They installed a whole elevator for this guy?

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They don't install one rather they reprogram an existing one

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“When I walked in this morning, and saw the flag was at half mast, I thought 'alright another bureaucrat ate it.'" - Ron Swanson

You can't reprogram Mr. Loverman!

Thrilling is his favorite habit.

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Don't know if you care, but at 2006 Backlash Vince actually booked a no-holds barred tag-team match of himself and his kid Shane vs. Shawn Michaels & God. Not a typo. Obviously the McMahons 'officially' went over. It was as dumb as one might suspect.

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Power is always in the hands of the masses of men. What oppresses the masses is their own ignorance, their own short-sighted selfishness.
- Henry George

Theoretically would Roddy have hit Jacob on the head with a coconut on Piper's Pit?

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How do you get around on Saturdays if you don't ride in a car, Walter?

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Coconuts don't migrate. He would have thrown figs at him, then hit him with a chair.

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That's why I'm not too upset about the elevator. I live in the fuckin' penthouse so I'm sure it helps my value.

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Freedom is our Strength.

Can you blame Vince? I mean, God had the look

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Sherman remarked, "Well, Grant, we've had the devil's own day, haven't we?" Grant looked up. "Yes," he replied, followed by a puff. "Yes. Lick 'em tomorrow, though."