His therapist asked me to start this thread.

_________________

I took a huge shit at Doug's house and Steve walked into the bathroom as I left.
Truthfully I was feeling poorly all day.
That poo had to go. Had to go. Go now man.
Poor steve.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

Honestly I don't really feel all that bad about it.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

I mean Christ man it's a bathroom. What are you supposed to do in there make some goddamn rosewater? Should my poo smell like chanel #5?

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

I can tell. It’s not really much of an apology.

_________________

Look man I was feeling sick but I committed to going to the party. So I had to poo. SO WHAT OF IT?

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

Well Steve, I'm sorry that you had to smell my shit but I'm not sorry I had to shit and you had to smell it.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

Given the shifting definition of "rape" and "sexual assault" I think we all need to apologize.

I once looked at a girl and had impure thoughts. And for that I apologize.

_________________

I mean Steve didn't seem all that bent out of shape about it. At least he didn't say so.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

I bet Steve's shit smells terrible too. Doesn't yours?

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

I may have also cropdusted his neighbors kid on the way to the John. Honestly though I was so happy i didnt shit myself at the time that i didnt feel bad about it then either.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

And after all Steve has a couple micro dudes at home so I'm sure he's smelled worse.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

You know what screw you Steve. I didn't know you were gonna walk in there after I was in there.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

Once I totally honked all over the subway bathroom next to durty nellies. I mean fucking everywhere. I felt bad about that.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

But you know what now that I think about it how many times have I walked into a bathroom at a resturaunt near a late night bar and there's barf and diarreah all over the fucking place and I'm just needing to have a squirt is all and I deal with that nonsense.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

Also I might have hit Steve's mailbox once with my truck.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

But then again it's not my damn fault I was lugging shit all about trying to be helpful and all and that goddamn mailbox is in the worst place ever. Fuck that I don't care.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

I suppose Steve didn't choose that location for the mailbox. Maybe the post office did. They're asshole too. You know those fuckers make me shovel a fucking path for them for goddamn street delivery? My bloody mailbox is across both goddamn streets on my corner, not at my driveway and not across from my driveway anyhow. Have the fuckin snowplow fuckin clear the streets proper and it would be a problem but nooooo this fat cow actually got out of the truck to ring my bell to tell me to shovel the goddamn city street along my mailbox to get the mail in but guess what bitch youd have walked a lot less just putting my fucking post in the bloody box instead of waddling your was up my driveway to bitch at me. Why do people work so goddamn hard at not working hard? It's easier just doing the job. Making reasons not to do it is fucking harder goddamn it.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

When I was 6 I took a piece of cake that was way too big for me to eat. I have an uncle who loves cake and I blamed the one third eaten giant piece of cake on him.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

I tugged one out in the shower when my MIL was at my house.

_________________

In 5th grade I didn't do my homework and it was one of those lazy ass teacher deals where you pass your homework to the kid behind you and she reads the answers and you grade it and I erased the kids name in front of me and I wrote my name on that homework and we passed it all up afterwards and I got credit for the paperwork and he didn't and the teacher gave him sbit the next day cause he always did his homework and he swore he did it but something happened to it. That ok tho because when we were in high school he "accidently" shot a puck square into my balls at practice and he thought it was pretty funny when I peed blood in the locker room.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

Fixed.

_________________
Power is always in the hands of the masses of men. What oppresses the masses is their own ignorance, their own short-sighted selfishness.
- Henry George

You know man fuck that guy so what I took his homework that's bad I get that but dude I peed blood man real blood. I thought he ruptured my penis and let me tell you guys that sjit hurts a lot more than one missed assignment. And I never laughed. He thought my pissblood was hilarious. I thought I was dying. Well not really dying but seeing blood in you piss is startling at 17 years old. Now I see blood every day. I cut myself today as a matter of fact. Reaching into a blower motor housing. Thanks trane. Maybe you didn't make your edges sharp enough. Thanks.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

That mailbox had a rubber post by the way.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

As far as that shit at Doug's goes maybe I should have felt worse for Doug's wife than Steve. I might have painted that bowl proper and that a scrubbing there to fix that there.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

Was that misogynistic? That I assumed his wife cleaned the toilet? Maybe Doug scrubs the toilet? I dunno man he seems like a man's man. Perhaps his pimp hand is strong. He has killed a lot of eliksni. And hive.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

In fourth grade I pushed Ryan garrity under a fence along the schoolyard and sat on his head cause he was making fun of me. Little fucker.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

_________________
Power is always in the hands of the masses of men. What oppresses the masses is their own ignorance, their own short-sighted selfishness.
- Henry George

When I was a senior in high school I worked at service merchandise as an expiditor so I was that poor bloke that had to put that bullshit you ordered onto the conveyor belt for you to pick up and I had this boss Robert lacy who would decide to test us from time to time to see bow long it took to expedite orders and how accurate they were and he'd place fake orders to see how quick we were and he one day placed an order for an entertainment center and I hoarked that 200lb bitch over to the conveyor oy to find out that he was just testing and I had to return it and I was so pissed off that I punched what I thought was an empty box but it was actually a full box and it had no give and I shattered 4 bones in my hand and I walked out to the end of the conveyor area with fingers splayed about in unnatural directions and he saw me walking out of the warehouse and in front of a Saturday crowd of shoppers he yelled at me "what are you doing out here?" And I held up my fucked up broken hand and said I hurt myself and he sees my hand and screams "oh my god" and ran and got his car and drove me to the emergency room at roselle and weathersfield way and brought me in and I told them I was carrying a box and hit my hand on a standard as I was walking by and they paid for my injury care as it was a work injury.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

In 3rd grade I beat the living shit out of isaac Chung at lunch recess. I don't remember why. But miss lunetta, the head lunch mom who reaked of ninja perfume called my dad who beat the living shit out of me.


I hope Isaac deserved it. Cause I shit blood that night.

_________________
"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014