Hey. It's a rhetorical question. Dont tell me about your prostate or diarrhea when I'm doing a call and I ask how ya doing as I introduce myself.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

Everything gets messed up. Stick to hello.

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Elections have consequences.

Did you hear the bank on the corner is offering a hundred dollars if you go in there and they don't greet you with a hello?

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How about moving this thread to a section where it won't be seen?

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this is why I don't ask my clients how they are doing when I call them on the phone. Just a hello and then get right to the point.

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Bingo. "Hello, I am returning your call. How can I help you?"

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How about i move you to a section where you won't be seen.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

How about I put a wig on you and force you to cohabitate with IMU?

Oh wait, some other dude already took that job. My bad.

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I'd rather hear about a prostate then get the millennial "fine, thank you for asking."

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"I honestly don't see a good bet on the board here."

No. No, man. Shit, no, man. I believe you'd get your ass kicked sayin' something like that, man.

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Ahoy-hoy.

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"All crowds boycotting football games shouldn't care who sings or takes a knee because they aren't watching." - Nas

wtf

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Power is always in the hands of the masses of men. What oppresses the masses is their own ignorance, their own short-sighted selfishness.
- Henry George

Totes.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

When asked this question I respond with a simple "hello". Then I start talking about the reason for the conversation.

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I'm with LYK. If you're not looking to start a convo but want to avoid getting to the point immediately then don't ask a question. A simple "hey, nice to see you, how can I help" will suffice. I'm not gonna tell you my life story if you ask how I'm doing, but if someone else does then that's on you for asking the question. Not on them.

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Successful calls:

Kyrie Irving will never win anything as a team's alpha: check
T.rubisky is a bust: check
Ben Simmons is a liability: check
The Fields Cult is dumb: double check

2013 CSFMB ROY

Well it's kinda my way of saying "why did you call for service?"

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

It seems like there might be a more clear way of saying it than “how ya doing?” but I can’t think of another phrase that implies “why did you call for service?”

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“Mr. Trump is unfit for our nation’s highest office.”- JD Vance
“My god, what an !diot.”- JD Vance tweet on Trump
“I’m a ‘Never Trump’ guy”- JD Vance

Any call I make or answer is someone who is already pissed off. Sadly, no one ever calls me to say how happy they were with us. So if I ever say "hi, how are you?", it's always met with "well, I was pretty good until you guys came out here and fucked me over." So I just skip that part and try to see if there's a solution to whatever their issue is without getting into a 20-minute recap of the whole story.

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"All crowds boycotting football games shouldn't care who sings or takes a knee because they aren't watching." - Nas

How can I help you

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Plenty of people have suggested the following: "how can I help you?"

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Successful calls:

Kyrie Irving will never win anything as a team's alpha: check
T.rubisky is a bust: check
Ben Simmons is a liability: check
The Fields Cult is dumb: double check

2013 CSFMB ROY

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You know me like that.

Then stop asking a question you don't want answered.... Worse, is having having the saying thrown back at you.

Doesn't matter if it "How you doin" "Thank you" "What's up" etc.

When I ask what's up, don't tell me what's up!! ITS THE WORST !!!!

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CSFMB: Home of the small minded

It was rhetorical.

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“Mr. Trump is unfit for our nation’s highest office.”- JD Vance
“My god, what an !diot.”- JD Vance tweet on Trump
“I’m a ‘Never Trump’ guy”- JD Vance

At least as annoying as people talking Bears when they see me wearing my Bears jacket.

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"All crowds boycotting football games shouldn't care who sings or takes a knee because they aren't watching." - Nas

No, I was just asking if you needed help with anything.

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Pointing and laughing is more appropriate.

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“Mr. Trump is unfit for our nation’s highest office.”- JD Vance
“My god, what an !diot.”- JD Vance tweet on Trump
“I’m a ‘Never Trump’ guy”- JD Vance

Talking on the phone in general is on par with being waterboarded. The only thing I think about the whole time is how to get off the phone.

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Being fucking civil is the worst.

I mean you gotta try to get some kind of friendly report with people you're gonna sock with $1000 worth of repairs or replacements.
I try to be like "how we doing?" Or "so what do we have going on here?" Expecting to hear "well my furnace is making a weird noise" or "the air is coming on but it's not cold" which I get 90% of the time but dude I'm clearly asking about your heat not your hemorrhoids.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014