My wife lived near the Swiss border for over a year working as an au pair right after college. Her French is very strong now and I'm sure it was really good back then. But it always takes some time to pick up actual colloquial speech rather than what you learn in your school texts.

My wife was in an ice cream shop in Lyon and when she ordered she didn't do it like a native, for example, "chocolate, sugar cone". She did it as if she were reading from a book: "One scoop of chocolate ice cream on a sugar cone, please." A group of teenage girls giggled and one of them said "Si mignon."

_________________
Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

Just three blocks west of the Kennedy Expressway.

_________________

It always intrigued me that a certain word or phrase misplaced could derail an entire conversation while overseas.

Growing up in a heavily influenced Italian-American home, I knew MANY words and phrases. When I got stationed in Italy, I was a bit cocky but soon got knocked down a few pegs trying to communicate.

I was there for four years and learned a lot. Slang and regional dialects dictate much of the speech pattern and phrases. I imagine this is the same with France, Spain, Greece, etc. After four years in Italy, I got by rather easily and was comfortable communicating.

Fluent? Not by a long shot. Honestly, I never really put in the commitment or work. I just wanted to be able to get by with ease and took my lumps when I said something wrong or was corrected.

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"This is Chicago, my friend. Anything can happen."

_________________
Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

Yep - something like that.

"Commendatori!"

_________________
"This is Chicago, my friend. Anything can happen."

That's the one. I think we went by the Light Bulb Depot on our other jaunt.

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I don't remember half the time if I'm hiding or I'm lost

The French are way more accommodating and understanding of intermediate American francophones than they are French Canadians. Fluency is a tough nut to crack, I can talk, listen, read and write in French but I still wouldn't consider myself fluent. I am not sure one can ever really achieve fluency in adulthood, like even if I lived in Angers (or somewhere were English skills are zero and there is zero infrastructure for English speakers whatsoever) for years and never used my English I dont think I would ever really have the working mastery of French that I have of English.

My wife says that speaking Quebecois is sort of like speaking "English" with one of those guys on Swamp People. But she does say that one thing that is nice about Quebecois French from a native English speaker's standpoint is that the sentence structure subject/predicate order is often done English style.

_________________
Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

Not that I am an international man of mystery like you guys but I always feel like I get credit for trying even if I botch it up.

Last year in Barcelona it was a bit of a rough ride. My Spanish is rural Mexican and at times they looked at me like I had two heads. But I never felt like anyone was insulted.

I did find other ways. You can't be in that town for more than an hour without figuring out that soccer player Lionel Messi (good ole #10) is their guy. One night we were in a bar and a BIG match was on TV. I asked the cute millenial server in my worse Michoacán Spanish if this Lionel Messi guy is any good. I got a really cute "he's the best in the whole world." So after paying sufficient homage to him (including singing "Chelsea's Dagger" after each of his two goals) we were treated like royalty for the rest of the night, including some comped wine and appetizers

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"I honestly don't see a good bet on the board here."

It would be like a swamp person's accent speaking Victorian English. It sounds kinda ridiculous.

I studied Spanish in school for ten years. Michoacán Spanish seems to be the default for Chicago conversational Spanish. Most every Spanish speaker I ever worked with was from Michoacán. I'm pretty used to it and I picked up most of my colloquialisms from them. But I have to admit it's nice talking to city people from D.F. as they speak much more like what I learned in school.

_________________
Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

Oops:

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/woman-sex-paralysed-claire-busby-suing-lawsuit-defective-bed-a8597146.html

Woman paralysed during sex suing furniture company over 'defective bed'

_________________
Hawaii (fuck) You

I was finishing up a sales call in the lobby of a office building and when I went to leave, I walked into one of the windows instead of through the door. Needless to say, I never called that account again.

_________________
"I give you my word as a Biden"

Most embarassing - getting caught having sex in public twice.

C Howitt Exhibitz

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Sex isn't dirty, sex isn't a crime. It's a loving act between two or more consenting adults.

-Hank Kingsley

Submitted for one's bathroom reading pleasure .....

https://www.dnainfo.com/chicago/20150508/south-loop/how-many-times-have-you-heard-not-stock-for-tile-outlet-actress-tons/

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Power is always in the hands of the masses of men. What oppresses the masses is their own ignorance, their own short-sighted selfishness.
- Henry George

Actually got a ticket for being parked on a parkway just after. Since I was away at school for the court date, my dad appeared on my behalf. He didn't realize what was unsaid on that ticket. The laughter he had to endure got me one REALLY angry phone call.

He didn't realize that a sitting judge would laugh so heartily when dismissing the ticket with an admonition to have his son to take his extracurricular to a private location next time.

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There are only two examples of infinity: The universe and human stupidity and I'm not sure about the universe.

Back in the late 90s you could go to the hill in the forest preserve in Bloomingdale and nobody would be around. My girlfriend and I were up there for a while - and my best friend's father happened to ride his bike to the top of the hill. Lovely. Looked up, saw him - but what could I do? He left and didn't say a word.

Second time was down in Mexico in my ex's hometown.