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 Post subject: Coaching youth sports
PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 10:54 am 
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I was asked on Friday evening to help a friend who is coaching a junior high basketball team. They practice M-F from 3:15 - 5:30. I have never
coached a sport in my life, only played. I don't really have much of a rapport with kids in general but I base that off of my relationship with my
step son mostly and we have zero things in common so it is difficult and strained. Maybe it would be better with kids that have common interests,
in this case basketball. The time commitment to me initially seems like an awful lot, especially for kids that aren't mine and I don't know, but the
other part of me that my wife is trying to convince me of, is that this could be something good for me. I know some of you have or are currently
coaching. What made you take the plunge? Were you happy you did it? I am considering offering this guy 2-3 days a week and just see how it
goes, I am not being forced to stay if it doesn't work out or isn't my thing. Looking for some common sense advice for a coaching newbie. My
friend told me the kids never even won a game last year so it isn't like it is a high pressure situation or big expectations. Maybe helping a rebuild
of the program would be satisfying. I really value my free time outside of work so I am really on the fence.

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 10:57 am 
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Being able to coach up a kid and see their joy is a very rewarding experience. Don't buy the shit that "winning doesn't matter". Of course it matters. No kid wants to be on a losing team. In terms of parents, tune out the noise. Many will provide useless/snotty feedback during games claiming they can "do better". Just ignore it.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 11:00 am 
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Tough one, T-Bone. Good luck.

A buddy asked the same of me about 25 years ago. Both our boys were in soccer for a park district thing.

Long story short - the parents were a nightmare. Said I would never do it again and I didn't.

Total respect for people who do these coaching gigs. As for me - "Can't do it."

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 11:01 am 
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I think you should do it and see how it goes. I've helped out coaching a few times and I loved it. The parents were great which was helps tremendously. Also the no great expectations for the team is a plus. When the wins come, it will be awesome to have been a part of.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 11:03 am 
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Every day for 2 hours is a lot.

We do 3-4 days in a 7 day week, sometimes 5-6 if we have make ups. You better hope you like it if you're doing it that much.

I very much enjoy it. Seeing kids get better and how excited they are is worth it for sure.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 11:05 am 
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I coached my son in youth football and it was sometimes hard but extremely rewarding. He is now in college and to this day his buds are always around that I coached and they call me by my coach name.

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 11:09 am 
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pittmike wrote:
I coached my son in youth football and it was sometimes hard but extremely rewarding. He is now in college and to this day his buds are always around that I coached and they call me by my coach name.

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 11:14 am 
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T-Bone wrote:
I was asked on Friday evening to help a friend who is coaching a junior high basketball team. They practice M-F from 3:15 - 5:30. I have never
coached a sport in my life, only played. I don't really have much of a rapport with kids in general but I base that off of my relationship with my
step son mostly and we have zero things in common so it is difficult and strained. Maybe it would be better with kids that have common interests,
in this case basketball. The time commitment to me initially seems like an awful lot, especially for kids that aren't mine and I don't know, but the
other part of me that my wife is trying to convince me of, is that this could be something good for me. I know some of you have or are currently
coaching. What made you take the plunge? Were you happy you did it? I am considering offering this guy 2-3 days a week and just see how it
goes, I am not being forced to stay if it doesn't work out or isn't my thing. Looking for some common sense advice for a coaching newbie. My
friend told me the kids never even won a game last year so it isn't like it is a high pressure situation or big expectations. Maybe helping a rebuild
of the program would be satisfying. I really value my free time outside of work so I am really on the fence.


First thing I would do is teach them how to paragraph.


not reading wailing wall of text.

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 11:38 am 
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I started coaching the same way many parents do, my son was playing "house league" baseball and they needed volunteers. The last 3 years I've managed my daughters softball team. I love doing it, but I have my own kids on the team. It would be way too much of a time commitment if my daughters weren't there. Best part is seeing them improve over a long period of time. By the time we are done, will probably be 6ish years with a chunk of the team staying together the whole time (like franchise mode on a video game...)

You said Junior High team, but is it an actual school team, or a travel team with that age kids? The travel teams might practice those days, but they typically also have a lot of weekend games. If you think you would enjoy teaching them, I'd say give it a try. The kids will probably be great, and as an assistant, any really big parent issues would be dealt with by the head coach.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 11:50 am 
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Definitely do it but remember you're not Johnny Coachemup because you watched a basketball game or read a blog. Just try to make practice time as much fun as possible so it doesn't seem like a chore.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 11:51 am 
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Coaching has been one of the best things i have done. I say go for it.

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 12:05 pm 
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Keyser Soze wrote:
Just try to make practice time as much fun as possible so it doesn't seem like a chore.


Very good advice.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 1:04 pm 
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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 1:16 pm 
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Try it. You might take to it. Besides, all the stress is on the head coach. You can murmur under your breath that his offensive sets are shit.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 1:21 pm 
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KDdidit wrote:
After a loss take them to Culvers and eat frozen custard in front of them.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 1:21 pm 
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About twenty years ago, my friend Jerry who died was set to coach his grandson's team in Norridge Little League. The guys that ran the league had ranked all the players. Jerry's grandson was ranked as an eighth round draft choice which meant Jerry would lose his pick in the eighth round. Jerry was simultaneously miffed that his grandson was ranked so low and excited that all he would lose was an eighth rounder.

Jerry had previously coached his grandson at Hiawatha Park and a bunch of kids from Hiawatha were going over to play at Norridge because it was an actual Little League organization. I used to go watch the games sometimes before we would go out to the racetrack. Jerry and I figured we knew the Hiawatha players better than the goofs at Norridge did.

Anyway, Jerry had another guy from Hiawatha set to be his assistant coach. That meant Jerry had to draft his kid because you only got one protected player per team. There was a hard throwing motherfucker named Billy Rasch and Jerry and I agreed that he should be his first pick. Jerry planned to take the guy who was going to be his assistant's kid in the second round. I told him there was no way he should do that as the kid wasn't good enough to blow his second pick on. I insisted the kid would still be there for the third pick.

So they held the draft. It's all this cloak and dagger shit. Only one coach per team allowed in the room. Afterward I get a call from Jerry. He says, "Guess what, Branch Rickey. Somebody took my coach's kid in the second round. Now I have no fucking assistant. Practice is at 3:00 on Monday. I expect you to be there." :lol:

By the end of the season, I pretty much hated every one of the kids on that team.

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 1:24 pm 
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:lol: thankfully he has said if it isn't for me that I can walk. I guess I have nothing to lose really. Gotta get a few things squared away with my
wife and then I will probably jump in for 3 days a week and see how it goes.

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 1:44 pm 
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The younger the kids the worse the job is. Because of the parents. Coaching your own kid also is tough on you and also tough on him or her. Again, because of the parents. The least fun I ever had in coaching was little league baseball and the equivalent in basketball.

It won't be so bad if you are the assistant, though. YOu can maybe find a few kids that actually want to learn something in their time with you. But if you are in charge, some advice.

1. Set some rules and boundaries such as: No coaching from the stands; no criticism of players from the stands including their own kids; no temper tantrums; etc.

2. Have a regular organized practice with set warm up exercise time adhered to. Make sure players get to practice and games on time with reduced playing time in games if they do not.

3. Do NOT transport players to practices or games. Too much liability at stake.

4. Have a mother attend all practices. Again. Too much liability at stake.

5. Sit players down if they act up. One alternative is to send them to their parents if they act up in a game. I am talking here about fighting with other guys, or throwing equipment, etc.

6. Have a parents only discussion early on in which you lay out the rules of both parental and child behavior. In other words, treat this like you were a teacher which in essence you really are.

7. Prepare for your practices and games. The more organized you are the better.

8. YOu can't do everything. Tell the kid what he needs to work on to get better and the parents also. Be honest. Some parents think that their kid is God's gift to the sport. Nothing wrong with that, I guess, but every kid can get better.

9. Don't take everything serious but don't take shit from anyone. You VOLUNTEERED for this right? Fuck em if they don't understand this! :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink:

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 1:51 pm 
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The Hawk wrote:
The younger the kids the worse the job is. Because of the parents. Coaching your own kid also is tough on you and also tough on him or her. Again, because of the parents. The least fun I ever had in coaching was little league baseball and the equivalent in basketball.

It won't be so bad if you are the assistant, though. YOu can maybe find a few kids that actually want to learn something in their time with you. But if you are in charge, some advice.

1. Set some rules and boundaries such as: No coaching from the stands; no criticism of players from the stands including their own kids; no temper tantrums; etc.

2. Have a regular organized practice with set warm up exercise time adhered to. Make sure players get to practice and games on time with reduced playing time in games if they do not.

3. Do NOT transport players to practices or games. Too much liability at stake.

4. Have a mother attend all practices. Again. Too much liability at stake.

5. Sit players down if they act up. One alternative is to send them to their parents if they act up in a game. I am talking here about fighting with other guys, or throwing equipment, etc.

6. Have a parents only discussion early on in which you lay out the rules of both parental and child behavior. In other words, treat this like you were a teacher which in essence you really are.

7. Prepare for your practices and games. The more organized you are the better.

8. YOu can't do everything. Tell the kid what he needs to work on to get better and the parents also. Be honest. Some parents think that their kid is God's gift to the sport. Nothing wrong with that, I guess, but every kid can get better.

9. Don't take everything serious but don't take shit from anyone. You VOLUNTEERED for this right? Fuck em if they don't understand this! :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink:


If you tried talking to me like that on day 1, I would roundhouse your ass.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 1:54 pm 
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The Hawk wrote:
4. Have a mother attend all practices. Again. Too much liability at stake.
The Hawk hates single fathers. SMH

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 1:59 pm 
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T-Bone wrote:
I was asked on Friday evening to help a friend who is coaching a junior high basketball team. They practice M-F from 3:15 - 5:30. I have never
coached a sport in my life, only played. I don't really have much of a rapport with kids in general but I base that off of my relationship with my
step son mostly and we have zero things in common so it is difficult and strained. Maybe it would be better with kids that have common interests,
in this case basketball. The time commitment to me initially seems like an awful lot, especially for kids that aren't mine and I don't know, but the
other part of me that my wife is trying to convince me of, is that this could be something good for me. I know some of you have or are currently
coaching. What made you take the plunge? Were you happy you did it? I am considering offering this guy 2-3 days a week and just see how it
goes, I am not being forced to stay if it doesn't work out or isn't my thing. Looking for some common sense advice for a coaching newbie. My
friend told me the kids never even won a game last year so it isn't like it is a high pressure situation or big expectations. Maybe helping a rebuild
of the program would be satisfying. I really value my free time outside of work so I am really on the fence.

Junior high is strange because it's when the games start being at least somewhat competitive as the players become decently skilled. It's probably a lot like coaching in the WNBA.

I'd still say the most important thing is to make sure the kids are having fun and be worried about skills development. The goal should really be to prepare them for a higher level of basketball even for the kids with less skill currently. You never know who will have a growth spurt or suddenly figure out how not to trip over the free throw line. It's probably a lot like coaching in the WNBA.

Since you said they didn't win a game last year I think you can avoid the pressures of overzealous parents living and dying with the results. Most will probably be happy that their kids get to do a sport and hopefully improve on the low level of skill they have. It's probably a lot like coaching in the WNBA.

I really did enjoy my time doing it in the summer. Even if you only really seem to help a few kids it is a nice feeling to know you had even a minor impact. Just remember the scores really don't matter and no one is going to care about the results even a few months later. No one would ever brag about the accomplishments at that level in life. It's probably a lot like coaching in the WNBA.

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 05, 2018 2:02 pm 
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Joe Orr Road Rod wrote:
About twenty years ago, my friend Jerry who died was set to coach his grandson's team in Norridge Little League. The guys that ran the league had ranked all the players. Jerry's grandson was ranked as an eighth round draft choice which meant Jerry would lose his pick in the eighth round. Jerry was simultaneously miffed that his grandson was ranked so low and excited that all he would lose was an eighth rounder.

Jerry had previously coached his grandson at Hiawatha Park and a bunch of kids from Hiawatha were going over to play at Norridge because it was an actual Little League organization. I used to go watch the games sometimes before we would go out to the racetrack. Jerry and I figured we knew the Hiawatha players better than the goofs at Norridge did.

Anyway, Jerry had another guy from Hiawatha set to be his assistant coach. That meant Jerry had to draft his kid because you only got one protected player per team. There was a hard throwing motherfucker named Billy Rasch and Jerry and I agreed that he should be his first pick. Jerry planned to take the guy who was going to be his assistant's kid in the second round. I told him there was no way he should do that as the kid wasn't good enough to blow his second pick on. I insisted the kid would still be there for the third pick.

So they held the draft. It's all this cloak and dagger shit. Only one coach per team allowed in the room. Afterward I get a call from Jerry. He says, "Guess what, Branch Rickey. Somebody took my coach's kid in the second round. Now I have no fucking assistant. Practice is at 3:00 on Monday. I expect you to be there." :lol:

By the end of the season, I pretty much hated every one of the kids on that team.



:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

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PostPosted: Tue Nov 06, 2018 10:32 am 
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Caller Bob wrote:
The Hawk wrote:
The younger the kids the worse the job is. Because of the parents. Coaching your own kid also is tough on you and also tough on him or her. Again, because of the parents. The least fun I ever had in coaching was little league baseball and the equivalent in basketball.

It won't be so bad if you are the assistant, though. YOu can maybe find a few kids that actually want to learn something in their time with you. But if you are in charge, some advice.

1. Set some rules and boundaries such as: No coaching from the stands; no criticism of players from the stands including their own kids; no temper tantrums; etc.

2. Have a regular organized practice with set warm up exercise time adhered to. Make sure players get to practice and games on time with reduced playing time in games if they do not.

3. Do NOT transport players to practices or games. Too much liability at stake.

4. Have a mother attend all practices. Again. Too much liability at stake.

5. Sit players down if they act up. One alternative is to send them to their parents if they act up in a game. I am talking here about fighting with other guys, or throwing equipment, etc.

6. Have a parents only discussion early on in which you lay out the rules of both parental and child behavior. In other words, treat this like you were a teacher which in essence you really are.

7. Prepare for your practices and games. The more organized you are the better.

8. YOu can't do everything. Tell the kid what he needs to work on to get better and the parents also. Be honest. Some parents think that their kid is God's gift to the sport. Nothing wrong with that, I guess, but every kid can get better.

9. Don't take everything serious but don't take shit from anyone. You VOLUNTEERED for this right? Fuck em if they don't understand this! :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink:


If you tried talking to me like that on day 1, I would roundhouse your ass.


Guarantee that you wouldn't, dipshit. Life's too short to put up with assholes like you.

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PostPosted: Tue Nov 06, 2018 10:38 am 
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Joe Orr Road Rod wrote:
About twenty years ago, my friend Jerry who died was set to coach his grandson's team in Norridge Little League. The guys that ran the league had ranked all the players. Jerry's grandson was ranked as an eighth round draft choice which meant Jerry would lose his pick in the eighth round. Jerry was simultaneously miffed that his grandson was ranked so low and excited that all he would lose was an eighth rounder.

Jerry had previously coached his grandson at Hiawatha Park and a bunch of kids from Hiawatha were going over to play at Norridge because it was an actual Little League organization. I used to go watch the games sometimes before we would go out to the racetrack. Jerry and I figured we knew the Hiawatha players better than the goofs at Norridge did.

Anyway, Jerry had another guy from Hiawatha set to be his assistant coach. That meant Jerry had to draft his kid because you only got one protected player per team. There was a hard throwing motherfucker named Billy Rasch and Jerry and I agreed that he should be his first pick. Jerry planned to take the guy who was going to be his assistant's kid in the second round. I told him there was no way he should do that as the kid wasn't good enough to blow his second pick on. I insisted the kid would still be there for the third pick.

So they held the draft. It's all this cloak and dagger shit. Only one coach per team allowed in the room. Afterward I get a call from Jerry. He says, "Guess what, Branch Rickey. Somebody took my coach's kid in the second round. Now I have no fucking assistant. Practice is at 3:00 on Monday. I expect you to be there." :lol:

By the end of the season, I pretty much hated every one of the kids on that team.


:lol: :lol: :lol:

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PostPosted: Tue Nov 06, 2018 10:53 am 
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T-Bone wrote:
I was asked on Friday evening to help a friend who is coaching a junior high basketball team. They practice M-F from 3:15 - 5:30. I have never
coached a sport in my life, only played. I don't really have much of a rapport with kids in general but I base that off of my relationship with my
step son mostly and we have zero things in common so it is difficult and strained. Maybe it would be better with kids that have common interests,
in this case basketball. The time commitment to me initially seems like an awful lot, especially for kids that aren't mine and I don't know, but the
other part of me that my wife is trying to convince me of, is that this could be something good for me. I know some of you have or are currently
coaching. What made you take the plunge? Were you happy you did it? I am considering offering this guy 2-3 days a week and just see how it
goes, I am not being forced to stay if it doesn't work out or isn't my thing. Looking for some common sense advice for a coaching newbie. My
friend told me the kids never even won a game last year so it isn't like it is a high pressure situation or big expectations. Maybe helping a rebuild
of the program would be satisfying. I really value my free time outside of work so I am really on the fence.



Take the plunge T-Bone.

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PostPosted: Tue Nov 06, 2018 10:58 am 
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Still on the fence. Told my wife this morning that I was likely going to back out and she told me to hold out until I talked to her about it. She
seems to really think this is going to be very transformational for me. I'll let her make a final pitch before I decide. :lol:

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PostPosted: Tue Nov 06, 2018 10:59 am 
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T-Bone wrote:
Still on the fence. Told my wife this morning that I was likely going to back out and she told me to hold out until I talked to her about it. She
seems to really think this is going to be very transformational for me. I'll let her make a final pitch before I decide. :lol:

Just tell the guy you cant commit to be at every practice but you'll make what you can. Then go as much as you want.


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 06, 2018 11:09 am 
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I would coach baseball if I had a son...but since I don't, I'm good.

I would think golf would be your cup of T....Bone.

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PostPosted: Tue Nov 06, 2018 11:11 am 
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doug - evergreen park wrote:
I would coach baseball if I had a son...but since I don't, I'm good.

I would think golf would be your cup of T....Bone.


Not a bad idea. Especially if a school near you has no program or a shitty one. I have been told many times that the key to scholarships is golf more than many other sports. Especially girls. You can change some lives.

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PostPosted: Tue Nov 06, 2018 11:16 am 
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doug - evergreen park wrote:
I would coach baseball if I had a son...but since I don't, I'm good.

I would think golf would be your cup of T....Bone.


Or fencing, apparently...

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