It's big. People wander aimlessly. There is literally an aisle for olives. That's not made up. An aisle. My wife loves the cheese aisle. She's so excited that there is a whole aisle of cheese. If you've ever talked to her about woodman's she just goes nuts about the cheese aisle. But shes been there like 20 times and she's only bought those 1 pound bricks of lucerne mild cheddar. People walk around with blank children of the corn expressions muttering to themselves which cracker should I buy do the Jones like Ritz or water crackers or triscuits or maybe these wheat things but does anybody even eat saltines anymore or is that too 1985 and what goes good with lucerne mild cheddar? There are two cases of frozen pizzas. And fruits I've never seen or could possibly pronounce the name of. You have to do two separate lines if you need to buy your 3 or 4 bottles of scotch a week and then truck that shit around the store only to check again once you figure out which of 12 brands of blue cheese olive jars to buy that might go good with a brand of locally sourced responsible organic sustainable gin. I spent $230 there and came home and realized there was nothing to eat in the house and ordered a calzone with bacon and bacon.
And all they take is cash and discover. I mean that cool.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

Sounds like the Menards of grocery stores. If there was one near me I would check it out.

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Sherman remarked, "Well, Grant, we've had the devil's own day, haven't we?" Grant looked up. "Yes," he replied, followed by a puff. "Yes. Lick 'em tomorrow, though."

I'd plan on about an hour to fine each of the 4 items on your list.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

I went to the one in Pleasant Prairie once and absolutely hated it. Disorganized, kinda grimey, don't take real credit cards (who the fuck still has a Discover card?).

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"When people want their version of the truth, they go find it, no matter how baseless their beliefs." -- Ken Rosenthal

Discover? They know who shops there lol!

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I do. I've had it for like 20 years. I'm afraid to close the account because I live close enough to Riverwoods that I think they'll send over my doppelganger here to kill me with my own socks.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

I agree SiniSide.

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2018
#ExtendLafleur
10 More Wins

I have two Discover cards.

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Oh need one on the coast too richie rich?

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

I didn't see anything in there about being homeless or about a wannabe rap career

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

Their liquor store side of the store is the shit. The only thing confusing to me is how the fuck the 350lb albatrosses that are clearly on government aid can come in there with 2 CARTS full of absolute garbage and drop at least 500? Ive never minded shopping at the North Aurora branch by my parents, but the one by Hawg....fuck that.

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That's my purse! I don't know you!

But the length of the post is definitely there.

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2018
#ExtendLafleur
10 More Wins

One business and one from my wife.

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Stay on your side of town!!!

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2018
#ExtendLafleur
10 More Wins

I prefer to think of it as girth.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

Woodman's is wonderful. I'm sorry grocery shopping is too confusing for you.

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Power is always in the hands of the masses of men. What oppresses the masses is their own ignorance, their own short-sighted selfishness.
- Henry George

Bruce
Tucker
Lyle

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Woodman’s is great. They have an amazing amount of sku’s.

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Hawaii (fuck) You

I too am a BIG FAN, frequenting Kenosha but also occasionally stop at Madison, Janesville and Buffalo Grove. I especially enjoy the liquor department. Good prices and MANY sizes and selections.

But the stores are big and I do see way more mobility scooters there than I do at Jewel.

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"I honestly don't see a good bet on the board here."

When my job takes me to Rockford I always hit it if I have time. Pretty much if they still make it , they have it. Only place I know of that still carries cans of Del Monte tomato wedges. I also hit the refrigerated pickle section for Nathans sweet horseradish pickles that I can't even find in the QC or Peoria.

Great store. Darko should be happy. It's about the only reason to be in Lakemoor.

Let Us Now Praise Woodman's Commercials

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jyCtB9jaVDY - wherein Phil is late on his cue to enter, very Tim and Eric

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D90zOTxgoHU - canes of Spaghetti-O's and a little kid wanders into the shot

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sd7mOp0rDLA - galens of vinegar and galens of bleach

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The one in sun prairie is always so busy it's not worth the hassle. Yes, it's the cheapest and best produce... But you get a headache every time. That said, the pick and save never employs more than 2 fucking checkouts at a time so you can go there at 9pm on a Sunday night and still wait in line for 20min. (Pick and save, FUCK YOU.)

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the world will always the world. your entire existence is defined by your response.

I sometimes go to the one in Carpentersville. They have a pretty big selection in both the grocery and liquor sections that you don't see at other stores, and the ShurFine house brand cracks me up. I really hate how some parts of the store have tile with grout joints that causes the carts to make a very loud BANG BANG BANG noise. I don't know why they did that.

"We want to see you in Lakemoor" is a phrase no one wants to hear...ever.

Woodman's liquor store...solid!

Woodman's everything else...kinda gross and sad.

I've never been to a Woodman's, but the impression that I get (I'm a Mighty Mighty Bosstone) is that it's essentially an Aldi on steroids: pallets upon pallets of off-brand canned beans and toilet paper that are just as good as the name brands but still make you feel a little weird about buying them, like someone must be cutting some corner somewhere. As far as Wisconsin-based grocery stores go, it still has to be better than Pick 'n' Save, which, other than the one in Mukwonago, always seemed to be bare-shelved and filthy.


This is the Costco Experience

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They have literally everything. Off-brand, name brand, no brand...that's what makes the place so weird and creepy. The store is like 85% packaged food. It feels so wrong.

never understood that, even when i was like 10 years old i thought the same thing. its really annoying and a lot of stores have it.

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the world will always the world. your entire existence is defined by your response.

every grocery store is 85% packaged food... thats what people buy. to woodmans credit, their produce is the freshest and the cheapest. and usually the best quality too.

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the world will always the world. your entire existence is defined by your response.