Bon Jovi is very easy to hate. Aside from Wanted Dead or Alive almost all their stuff sounds like it was made in a lab. It doesn't sound like music that was created organically. It wounds like Jon spent thousands of hours in the studio layering shit over shit over shit until he had his perfect song. The Young Guns 2 soundtrack isn't that bad but that was kind of a side project. I had all the albums though and rocked my face off to them back in the day though.

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That's my purse! I don't know you!

I just YouTube'd this and I don't think I've ever heard this song in my life.

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You know me like that.

I've had a couple drinks and have been knocked out of the poker tournament (flush to a set) so here goes.

Heaven- Warrant
Love Song- Tesla
Paradise- Tesla (Very underrated. I actually sang this to a girl and she loved it.)
I Won't Forget You- Poison
Angel- Aerosmith
I'll be there for you- Bon Jovi
Never Say Goodbye- Bon Jovi
Love Bites- Def Leppard

Does "One" count? That's a great fucking song but we don't consider U2 a hairband.

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Lay off that whiskey and let that cocaine be.

I thought you were going to say Faithfully by Journey.

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Ever makeout to that song? I did. Lots of times. I love that song.

Dream On qualifies.

When you say Power Ballads, I don't include Journey or REO Speedwagon but that is just me.

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Lay off that whiskey and let that cocaine be.

Does a monster ballad have to be by a bunch of hair band pussies? What about Tom Waits's "Downtown Train"?

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

Listen here Boomer.

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

There is something really cute about a guy singing to a girl. I don't know if it's literature or pop music that sets it up and it doesn't matter if it's good or bad. About a year ago I was in the car with my family and a song came on my first boyfriend sang to me. I said omg my first boyfriend sang this to me all the time on the phone and I pictured myself in the kitchen with the long cord or in my room hearing it. My whole family looked at me like I was a complete idiot. My son said that is so stupid I'd get ripped apart if I did that. My daughter laughed and agreed and said she'd laugh at a boy if they did that. My husband laughed and asked if we had a song.

Yeah. Seriously. It's all hair band pussies. Don't ruin this with musical talent or credibility or whatever you artists conjure up in your heads.

This is the best youtube video ever https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M41i2ogcT50

Love it. We should hang out.

Definitely a great one, how is it possible that doc has never heard that song.

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

Looks like it came out 2nd semester of my Freshman year of college. Couldn't afford cable and I was studying.

Got cable the next year.

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You know me like that.

I had been dating this girl for a short amount of time. We had been watching a movie, having some drinks, with some light fooling around when she asked me to sing her a song. I am usually more reserved but that song just popped in my head so I went for it. She just about melted into the couch as I sang it to her. Definitely one of my finer dating moments.

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Lay off that whiskey and let that cocaine be.

Yeah if you were of junior or high school age and went to a dance in 1990 you definitely heard that song. They played it a lot on MTV as well which was the primary reason for the power ballad. Even Guns 'n Roses were relegated to Headbangers Ball when Welcome to the Jungle was released then they released Sweet Child o' Mine and blew up.

Are they pussies because of their hair and make-up? Most of them partied hard and threw it around often.

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Lay off that whiskey and let that cocaine be.

Styx - Babe was my first girlfriend's and my song.

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Of course...

Dont be stupid.

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That song takes me back to school dances at Miraleste Intermediate. The power ballad was a young dudes best friend. Slaughter's Fly to the Angels was also a good one. Wait by White Lion was another one but a little uptempo in spots for my purposes.

Yes that is part of the formula. By definition a power ballad is a song by a hair metal band which is of a noticeably slower style than most of their fare. They are usually done to increase exposure of band on MTV or top 40 radio. Can also be be done to showcase their singer's voice.

A typical power ballad will open with a solo keyboard or acoustic guitar, with more instruments and more elaborate melodies brought in as the song progresses, building up to a dramatic finale. An electric guitar solo close to the halfway point is obligatory. The lyrics usually talk about love, but not always. If done wrong, power ballads are very susceptible to being considered "cheesy" as a result. If done right, they can be powerful tear jerkers and be considered "epic".

You’ve thought about this.

Because, I’ll be honest, I don’t think there is a “definition”.

You are the Dr. Fauci of Monster Ballads.

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You know me like that.

Or a big sigh! then we both lie silent and still in the dead of the night. Jorr won't get it.

What's Miraleste Intermediate?

But Mongo and RFDC are experts. They are picking up what I am throwing down. They are monster Ballad experts. They unnerstand steelheart I'll never let you go and they know it's for hairbands slowing songs down and being kinda terrible but good n terrible.

It's like you with "my bank".

I think what she is trying to say Doc is that you are like Alex P Keaton while Mongo and I are more like Nick. And of course Spaulding is Mallory.

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

I was complimenting them.

And lots of people have banks. I'm not the only one.

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You know me like that.

Poison's "Fallen Angel" is definitely not a ballad of any kind. It is, however, their 2nd best song after "Ride The Wind".

Has anybody mentioned "Honestly" by Stryper yet?

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Just chillin' like Garret Quillin.

MJF was my biggest celebrity crush for years. Nick made me laugh though.

I'm pretty sure that I'm Alex's Uncle Tom Hanks.

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You know me like that.