Finally pulled the trigger on kitchen remodel and new flooring and paint for entire upstairs.

A fairly costly project, but one the wife has been working with a contractor and kitchen designer with for the better part of two years, never want to look at another kitchen cabinet, color, or floor sample again.

The problem is that the contractor who promised at most a two week project has significantly underdelivered on timelines.

Decided to take a Monday off so I could be there to talk to the contractor and his foreman. I am used to fairly direct and pointed questions given my profession, but these guys seemed shocked that I wanted to see some of the work and was not happy about the delays. There was one thing that was supposed to be done that I asked the foreman about and he said it was done, I showed him that it had not been done and he kind of went into a panic and started saying I need to talk to his boss, to which I said was fine, I will be here today and would welcome an opportunity to talk with him.

The foreman then gathered his tools and said he would not be back until I talked with his boss, I said that was fine and he could stop by or call me.
I did not get a call or visit, so I called the guy and he became very defensive and said I had intimidated his foreman and that he was scared to be at the house with me there. Seemed a bit extreme for a dude asking for proof of work. The contractor said I was too direct and his crew was physically intimidated by me and that he wanted only to talk to my wife about the project, was shocked at how fragile these guys were, expected construction guys to be much tougher.

Am I just a bad guy? Maybe some of the contractors out there can point out where I went wrong.

Of course you're not a bad guy. Your contractor sounds shady as hell.

I was in the business for awhile and here's a general truth. Women buy home improvements. Men try to stop them. Of course he wants to deal only with your wife.

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

Was looking for accountability.

Deal with this every day where family members directly question if a particular drug was given, or have a problem with a staff member, so have pointed, direct, and sometimes heated discussions with people every day, but always working toward getting and answer, have no problem going into a medical record and looking up meds, and then calling an RN or doctor to address issues. Kinda thought that's how things get done.

The painting guy did tell me that the fact they asked for upfront money was a bad sign. I told him if I ever do this again, I will pay him to help project manage the project and use guys he trusts to do the work, just wish I had found him earlier.

He wants to deal with your wife because he thinks he can deceive or intimidate her.

I grew up in a single-parent household and saw this kind of thing happen frequently with my mom. Since she was a psycho, that stuff didn't fly.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

I don't think a requesting a deposit or some upfront money is evidence of a shady operator. Looking at it from the contractor's side, sometimes you do a perfect job and it's tough squeezing the money out of the customer. A guy will make up picayune problems with the way you did the job and use that as a reason to refuse payment.

But it seems like you were asking normal questions. Those pussies preferred to be able to pat your wife and her head and "Yeah, yeah, yeah" her.

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Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

Did you have pants on while questioning the foreman?

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i sat and pondered the possibilities of who this thread was going to be about for a few minutes before i opened it

You could be just a gay guy, but you are definitely not a bad guy.

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Hawaii (fuck) You

I did not

Stole if from Uncle Terry who would sometimes out of the blue say, "He's just a bad guy", usually way before it got out there that the dude was in fact a bad guy.

The intimidation part is kind of strange but they may be concerned that you and your wife have a different opinion on what the job should be. If she was the one who was primarily telling them what she wanted and the scope of the project then they would want to talk to her. However, all of that should be documented. All the work we have done has had clearly documented expectations.

You may also be dealing with the COVID staffing issues that many businesses have dealt with. The lack of quality may be because they've had to hire people they wouldn't otherwise hire for things like this.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

Nobody and I mean nobody is going to take on any remodeling job, kitchen, bath etc without a down payment.

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Installing a new water line has been a sticking point, the foreman assured me it was done, and I pulled the fridge back and showed him it was not done. That seemed to throw the dude into some type of panic.

I also was asking for a firm timeline on when they would finish as I had painter and kitchen countertop guys that had already been pushed back lined up, the counter top dudes said if they didn't get there by early next week it would be quite a period of time because they were booked up.

Given the fact that the project was already 4 weeks behind schedule, I did not think those were unreasonable questions, but then again, I could just be a bad guy or apparently a scary guy from what they told my wife.

Yeah, we had given him a down payment 9 months ago, but he asked for most of the project cost after spending a few days on the project which my wife cut him a check for, he then said it would be a bit more than he thought and asked for even more, the guy was at the house four times in the bidding process and I pointed out everything that needed to be done.

Really wanted to bid it out, but wife liked the dude because his company had done some basic handyman stuff for us in the past and he assured me the project would not be too big for his company to handle. The dudes showed up at 1030, took an hour lunch, and cut out at 230, so maybe 4-5 hours on the job site, they also did not come back for days on end leaving the house torn up.

Don't sound good, take that check book away from your old lady.

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I think most of these guys juggle multiple jobs at once, rather than working on one job continuously until it’s done. So while frustrating, it’s not necessarily a red flag. The cost estimates and asking for most/all of the money in advance is more concerning.

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It sounds like they know they have messed up. Prepare to be mad but there isn't much you can do besides be insistent on either getting your money back or getting the work done as specified in the documents.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

It may be that they cannot get the material to complete your job for another month or two. Lead times of 8-10-12 weeks are not uncommon these days. It sucks, but there is nothing that can be done about it. Now if they aren't giving you honest information, thats a different story.

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When we had our kitchen done I think we put down about 25-30% then paid as large amounts of work got done in maybe 4 or 5 other chunks. Never keep giving them money if work is not completed. Have somebody supervise at least on the big days that knows and understands the project. The guy we hired had a good rep but was a complete asshole once in and you should never feel bad about trying to get good work on your house.

Our house was a pit when we bought it and we have done a ton of projects. There are a few people that I've really liked everybody else was kind of a dick. Trying to cut corners, not really working, poor communication, poor planning, trying to cover mistakes, it's all a big headache.

Has anyone returned since Monday?

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Had already buying stuff in segments for past 6 months, already had the flooring, cabinets, and new appliances/toilets either in my garage or in what used to be the office.

I had also already torn out the old carpet myself.

Shockingly after my intimidating and frightening interactions on Monday they came back out with a full crew and suddenly got moving.

Decided to take a self help trip to Wisconsin because they had told the wife they were scared of me being there, but have my retired next door neighbor updating me along the way.

Very difficult on the old marriage because I am beyond pissed at the wife right now for having to come in and make this happen after being assured she had it under control, and did not share the owners direct contact with me until I insisted.

Guess the only good news is the good people of the Ho Chunk nations are paying for my hotel via the Madison casinio.

If it's a total gut job and replacing stuff in the kitchen I would expect a reasonable timeline to be about 2 months or so. It takes every part a couple of days to complete their job with a few days of no work or scheduling in between. It's like something gets done once a week and if the contractor is doing some of it himself it takes a little longer, at least that has been our experience.

I would reconsider being there if I were you. They don't listen to women typically and on lots of it we don't know what we are looking for. That's why they don't want you there.

You are a bad guy and should feel terrible. Time to check your Rockford White Privilege.

That isn't just women. I sold a job for a basement remodel and my partner drafted the plans. We sent our crew out to do the work and the customer and the foreman put their heads together and rejiggered the entire job. I didn't really mind because it was bumping up the price and the profit but they came up with shit that was just idiotic. When it was done the basement looked stupid and the customer didn't like the job and started whining like a b!tch. I had made him sign off on the plans that HE came up with but he was still mad at me. He actually had the balls to say, "Well, I didn't know it would look like that." Hey pal, you should have taken the job the way my partner and I designed it. Fuck you. Pay me. And the foreman of the crew was a dope too. Don't think so much. Just pound the fucking nails.

_________________
Anybody here seen my old friend Bobby?
Can you tell me where he's gone?
I thought I saw him walkin' up to The Hill
With Elon, Tulsi, and Don

The foreman will try to get you to change things based on issues they encounter, if they screwed something up, or what makes their work easier.

There was a solid wall that now has about 4ft of cabinets on it next to a doorway. When the wall was taken down and the doorway was framed they took out a heating duct that was in the wall and it made the doorway bigger than it should have probably by about 6-8 inches. I'm looking at it and then measured it as they were framing it and said that's not right. They ignored me and built the wall. The contractor later tried to say no that's going to be okay. Really buddy? My cabinets sticking out 6 inches into the doorway is the work you want to put your name on, sure sure. Then he asked if I could change the cabinetry. He was a dope like that and then would act as if his clients were unreasonable. His foundation guy was a boob and unprofessional, the floor guy was terrible, and I think his painter was drunk all the time.

Glad to see Caller Bob and a group from Keokuk Iowa in the bleachers today.

Was he vaccinated?

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

Best thing you can do these days is to threaten them with a horrible review on any of the social media sites, Angie’s list etc.

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Proud member of the white guy grievance committee

It aint the six minutes. Its what happens in those six minutes.