Good morning internet cretins. Happy Friday. Happy Valentine’s day (to you CSFMB ladies.... hey. How you doon?) Welcome to the 10th week of the Douchebag 2009 season. Last week's big winner, by a very wide margin, was Chas n Nas. These two Message Board goons have been douchebagged for a major fighting and a game misconduct. Congratulations, men. This week we have some All-Star 3rd basemen, All-Star Tribune Columnists, a guy who had to cancel his All-Star performance, an All-Star CSFMB poster, and Christina Raines. So get your voting mouse warmed up and get ready to vote for the Douchebag of the Week!
Mary Schmich: Nominated by Ex-Media Guy for her lousy article about people who fantasize about working at a local Starbucks, as if that profession were laid back, fun, and introspective, a release from everyday stress and responsibility and anxiety. Most times I'm in Starbucks they baristas are sweating balls trying to fill 200 yuppies up on these wacked out frappe late mocha jobbers. If they were just pouring coffee, maybe, but these drinks take forever to make. Anyway, Mary's own poll shows up that well over 7 of 10 never considered working in a Starbucks, which means that 7 of 10 readers at minimum had no clue what the hell she was talking about. Plus she looks like a dude on meth. Do these things make her a Douchebag?
A-Rod or A-Roid???????: Mr. Belvidere tried to take Alex Rodriguez down a peg by telling us about how A-Rod failed a drug test in 2003. He further admitted to using performance enhancers for several years. Now, previous steroid figures were finger jabbers or refused to speak of the past or suddenly lost the ability to understand and speak English, but Alex Rodriguez went ahead and admitted the truth. On the other hand, he is a fraud. His admission cast a shadow of doubt across much of the sport. So, for cheating and cashing those big checks as a result, is A-Rod a Douchebag?
Chris Brown: CB DB WB: Porterhouse douchebagged Chris Brown for his actions the night before the Grammy awards. It seems that Rihanna gave him a booty call, then he ended up either beating her or making criminal threats to beat her. We don't know if Rihanna might have stepped out of line and deserved a correction or not, but Brown missing the Grammy gig is Douchebag worthy to me. The good news is that he's hired former Michael Jackson attorney Mark Geragos, so there ought to be a really fun trial. So is CBDBWB a Douchebag?
Christina Raines II: Walt Williams Neck brings us the sad tale of a young lady with kids and daddy issues who just can't quit Drew Peterson. Sure she admitted that her affair with him was a publicity stunt and she looks like a Fullerton and Cicero prostitute but does that make her a Douchebag? What about her apparent suicidal tendencies? I mean, living with this guy is dangerous; people are dead. Is she an attention whore? A media whore? A whore whore? Vote today if you think she a Douchebag!
Nadya Suleman and her Dr (14 kids...0 income): This story from rogers park bryan gets weirder and weirder all the time. Nadya is an unemployed mother of 6 who just had 8 more kids. She's a professional student who somehow had time to undergo plastic surgery to look more like Angelina Jolie. She says she hopes to live without public assistance sometime in late 2010. How could this woman have more kids when she was unemployed and couldn't support the 6 she had? Also, this raises questions on the responsibility of the "village" to raise these children. Also, this woman might not be alone in her doucheness; the doctor who implanted 6 more embryos than called for might also be a douche. So is this lady who admittedly cannot care for her children a douchebag?
Irish Boy: SteveSarley nominated Irish Boy for his Broheim like antics of Wednesday night. Irish got liquored up, and got one Hooters girl's number, then "dryfingered" another in the back of a Taxi. Did we mention that IB is engaged? This particular thread also featured chaspoppcap demanding some restraint and decorum, which was absolutely delicious. This thread also brought out bunt wad, and nut nut references, which also added to the nonstop hilarity. Anyway, if Irish was being a douche, was it his behavior, his bragging, or both that brought you to this conclusion? Please vote today.
Well there are your top 6 nominees for this week’s award. If yours didn't get nominated, it's because it was a sucky nomination. So make sure you vote today for the Week 10 Douchebag of the Week!
_________________ "Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014 bigfan wrote: Many that is true, but an incomplete statement.
|